On Friday of this week, Give Us This Day, shared a poem written by Sr. Macrina Wiederkehr (d. April 2020) from her book, Seasons of Your Heart, as the daily reflection. Macrina is one of my favorite Benedictine poets and authors. It brought back found memories of an Oblate Conference in Arkansas in 2015. We listened to many speakers share their thoughts on the conference theme of “Nurturing Benedictine Spirituality: From Theory to Practice”.

We visited several local attractions such as, Mount Magazine, this highest point in Arkansas and a winery. We traveled to Fort Smith, Arkansas, to attend prayer and have dinner with the sisters of St. Scholastica. I had the great pleasure of being at the dinner table with delightful and joyful women. One of those women said her name quickly and then bantered throughout the dinner with Sr. Karen from the monastery in Ferdinand, Indiana. She was silly and frivolous, almost flighty. The conversation was full of laughter and joy.

It wasn’t until the next day, when a woman came on stage to offer a keynote presentation that I realized it was the same woman I heartily laughed through dinner with. Macrina spoke about Benedictine spirituality and elements that are an essential part of integrating this spirituality into our lives; living awake, living more simply and the daily practice of Lectio Divina (sacred reading of scripture). She talked about being mindful in every moment of our lives, a theme you will find in her books. Her talk moved me, not only because of the key points that she invited and challenged us to consider, but because I saw that she embodied what she spoke about. She was joyful, spontaneous, astute and wise. She was completely genuine and had no desire to make herself the center of attention. She personified the aspects of Benedictine spirituality to which I aspire, especially humility.

I am sure the wisdom she radiated was gained from a lifetime of integrating the elements of which she spoke and that this poem voice. I will share a few lines of the poem below that I have been sitting with since Friday.

The God I was trying to love was too demanding

And so I looked for other gods who would ask less of me…

Possession, recognition, power!

I bowed before them but my hunger only deepened…

But my true God never lost sight of me and in that lies my salvation

for in one desperate moment

smothered by gods who couldn’t save me

I prayed for a God would fill my lies with truth…

God heard that prayer and loved me

I was given back to myself,

and taught how to answer my own prayer

so that with other believers I might again proclaim:

Jesus Christ is Lord!

Peace, Deena

Photo: from my photos taken during the Oblate Conference in Subciaco, Arkansas. This photo is the Coat of Arms/Logo of St. Scholastica Monastery in Arkansas. Macrina made her home there with the Sisters of St. Scholastica.