Featured

On the lookout for peace

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, A life worth living, a school of God's service, Benedictine Oblate, Coming home to myself, contemplation, Life of purpose, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeking Peace, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Women Mystics2 Comments

During the Covid pandemic years I took several online classes, retreats and programs. One of those was a Women’s Mystics School offered by Spiritual Wanderlust, an online community supporting aspects of the interior life and exploring wisdom teachers in the contemplative tradition, modern psychology, philosophy and spirituality. It was always my favorite Saturday of the month to listen to and learn from the speakers invited to present to us. In 2022, we looked at the life and writings of modern mystic, Etty Hillesum.

Etty was a Dutch Jewish woman killed in the concentration camps in 1943. Etty was a well-educated woman who suffered from severe depression and sought help from her analyst, Julius Spier, who became her mentor, friend and lover. Spier encouraged her to keep a journal or diary. Those writings were published after her death in “An Interrupted Life and Letters from Westerbork.” Etty wrote reflections on things she read by Carl Jung and Rainer Maria Rilke. She wrote about her relationship with Spier. She wrote of her inner world. During the German occupation, Etty refused to go into hiding. She was forced to go to Westerbork, one of the transition camps, for Dutch Jews. From June to September 1943 she writes from Westerbork before being transferred herself to Auschwitz before being killed in November at the age of 29 years old.

What I found striking during our study of Etty’s writing was how she attempted to look at the situation she was facing, the trains and the faces of those being boarded on them, the German guards, and her own perspective and relationship to a God who dwelled deep within her. She tried to find and give love, build community, in the little ways she could while helping others in the transition camp. She focused on living fully, holding suffering and beauty simultaneously, despite the conditions she was facing. She didn’t focus on a God, external, in the midst of the turmoil in her country and the world. Rather, she experienced God in the deepest, richest parts of her being, and found rest and shelter there.

I was reminded of this study a couple of weeks ago, reading an article on Hillesum by Richard Rohr and the Center for Action and Contemplation. Rohr shared several of Etty’s writing in his reflection. They seem relevant for me today.

Etty reflects on the war she is seeing around her and writes, “Why is there war?… Because I and my neighbor and everyone else do not have enough love. Yet we could fight war and all the excrescences by releasing, each day, the love that is shackled inside of us, and giving it a chance to live.” We don’t have to look to war torn countries. All we need do is look to our current government and how our legislative representatives interact with each other and those they disagree with.

In today’s Gospel for the Eighteenth Sunday in Ordinary Time, (Matthew 14: 14-21) Jesus is “moved with pity” seeing the crowds following him, seeking guidance and his teaching. In the famous scene, the apostles are concerned for the thousands gathering around them, needing food, and asks Jesus to spend them away. Jesus initially responds to their request by saying that the apostles don’t need to send them away, but to feed them. They, of course, resist and say what they have is not enough. Jesus then feeds the crowds and abundant leftovers are gathered.

How often do we resist and say that we are just one person, we don’t have enough (time, resources, confidence) to make a difference in the world?

Even on a smaller, more personal level, Hillesum writes that we fight so many small battles, within, each day, that sap our energy. She offers instead that we must “not allow ourselves to become infested with thousands of petty fears and worries, so many motions of no confidence in God…. Ultimately, we have just one moral duty: to reclaim large areas of peace in ourselves, more and more peace, and reflect it towards others. And the more peace there is in us, the more peace there will also be in our troubled world.”

Silencing those small voices that insist on promoting unrest within can be challenging. Add social media to the mix and the voices seeking to drown out peace get louder and louder. So, I might be missing out on an update from a friend, or local area news, but reducing the amount of time I spend on social media, or on the news, saves the little bit of peace I can control.

Hillesum writes, speaking to God, “One thing is becoming increasingly clear to me: that You cannot help us, that we must help You to help ourselves. And that is all we can manage these days and also all that really matters: that we safeguard that little piece of You, God, in ourselves. And perhaps in others as well… You cannot help us, but we must help You and defend your dwelling place inside us to the last.”

This week I choose to be more on the lookout for peace than unrest and for small ways that I can make a difference with my humble fish and loaves.

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Image: St. Francis statue, a garden in Assisi.

Featured

Calming the mind

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, a life of joy, Benedictine Oblate, Coming home to myself, contemplation, creative well-being, mental wellbeing, mindful breathing, mindfulness, monastic prayer, ora et labora, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, toolkit for the spirit2 Comments

Last weekend was the most delicious pause to stitch and learn from designers, and those with a presence, in the stitching world. It was filled with lots of laughs and mutual support, which I am finding to be the hallmark of the stitching community. Last September I saw a Halloween chart and decided I was going to learn to cross stitch. I had never purchased a piece of fabric or floss for stitching. I have become obsessed with my new hobby. I love learning tips and tricks, of course. But more than anything else I love hearing the journeys of stitchers and creators that I follow. The husband and wife team of Artsy Housewife, Gigi the designer, delight me with their stitching and stories. Stephanie, a competent designer and owner of Lindy Stitches (an online store for all things stitching), shared a self-deprecating video of her 10 biggest design flops this week, not to solicit support or sales, but to share her thoughts for those who might be trying their hand at designing charts. As usual, she had me laughing! I am constantly amazed at the wisdom of Jacob de Graaf, a designer from the Netherlands, who is an expert on antique samplers. His own designs are influenced by Quaker samplers and designs from the Netherlands and Scandinavia. I have selected two (what am I thinking?!) designs for my August birthday stitch and as part of a stitch along he will be leading. The list of designers, makers, and regular stitchers like me, who share their insights, journeys and projects, that I watch and learn from is endless.

But, the best part of stitching is the quiet, steady, peaceful flow state I enter each and every night as I work on projects. Other concerns, or mindless chatter, fall into the background. Each stitch becomes a tiny win for the day. They are little victories that release feel good hormones like dopamine. Knitting and crocheting do the same for those engaging in those crafts, also said to support emotional regulation and good brain chemistry. As our brains lock into the single task at hand, the brain gets focused and feels safe. I am changing and growing with each project I stitch, not only in confidence but also a sense of who I am as a person. I began learning about the neurological reactions of crafting, journaling and drawing, and the impact on our overall well-being, when I began experimenting with and studying neurographic art last year. By focusing on the process of drawing simple lines and curves, we calm down and relieve stress. This alone can help us find solutions to issues we might be dealing with.

My prayer and contemplative practice has slowed down and become more centered as well. It has become easier to quiet the mind when it is racing. I can pray as I stitch – each stitch, each breath, clear a space to listen more attentively.

Another practice I was introduced to this summer was helpful as well. As I have shared, and written, I am a Benedictine Oblate. Generally each day, besides praying the psalms, I try to read The Rule of St. Benedict, which guides our daily living in the principles of stability, mindful work, and hospitality to others (welcoming the Christ in all persons). The Rule is broken down into small nuggets, or chapters, for each day of the year. There are many excellent commentaries on The Rule, which studying as an Oblate, help us find relevance for living in the modern world.

I was gifted a version of The Rule, “Suscipe me, Domine” compiled by a men’s monastic community in Norcia, Italy. I read one of the reflections on “Unceasing Prayer in the Rule of St. Benedict” that has significantly transformed my prayer life. Many of us are familiar with the “Jesus Prayer” prayed by the Desert Fathers and early Christian monks as a way to practice continuous prayer. It is certainly a version that I could have chosen. The reflection stated that St. John Cassian, who had a significant impact on St. Benedict’s writing of The Rule, advocates one prayer, “an all-purpose invocation” that can and should be prayed by monastics at all times, as transition from personal prayer to communal prayer, for those in an abbey or monastery. Cassian’s recommended verse was “O God, come to my assistance. Lord, make haste to help me.” This is a typical verse recited, or chanted, as the opening line for specific “hours” of prayer, such as Morning and Evening Prayer, in the Liturgy of the Hours. I began using this verse at various times of the day – when I sat down to pray but didn’t want to pray standard prayers or intercessory prayers, when my mind was racing with a concern that I wanted to quiet, during weekly Adoration in front of the Blessed Sacrament, and at 3 or 4 a.m. when I wake and sense that my mind wants to begin to spin out of control. Breathing slowly and repeating this simple prayer has been powerful! I would encourage anyone with “monkey mind” to give it a try. I’d love to hear your experience after practicing it awhile.

Lastly, finding ways to slow down and tune into our breath can be an amazingly simple practice to bring calm into your day. Whether stitching, praying a simple mantra, or sitting quietly in a chair paying attention to the breath, I am confident you will introduce more moments of peace into your day.

If you would like to learn more about breath practice, my friend Kate Brown, and her teacher, Valerie Sorrentino, will be offering a free live Zoom experience this week, Room To Breath, on Thursday, July 30th at 6 p.m. CT. You do not have to have previous breath work experience to participate. You will learn more about intentional breathing and two simple practices from Valerie’s program. I hope you will join me there! I will provide the link below (for those on social media, you may have to click the link to my website to access it).

I wish you a week that is steady, calm and full of peaceful moments, Deena

Click here for link to Room To Breathe

Today’s image: One of my 9-month patriotic stitch alongs, Remember the Ladies as part of America the Beautiful, by designer, Teresa Kogut.

Featured

Taking a Sunday pause

On By dpavinatoIn Coming home to myself, creative well-being, taking a pauseLeave a comment

I hope you are having a great weekend. I am attending a virtual stitch event and trying to keep up with watering the plants in all this heat. I have been contemplating different topics for this week. As I was looking through my photos for an image to match, I saw this one and it just said “pause” to me.

Stay safe if you are being impacted by the air quality from the fires in Canada. Please keep all those more directly impacted and fighting the fires in your thoughts and prayers.

Wishing you a peaceful week, Deena

Featured

Cultivating growth

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Cultivating growth, Every day Catholic, Life in the Spirit, nurturing growth, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Tending the garden, Trust the journey2 Comments

I planted a new shrub this Spring. I was looking for a full sun plant, for the flower bed in the south of my duplex, that gets direct sun morning until late afternoon. The Potentilla fruticosa ‘Jefman’, or Mandarin Tango Potentilla, was a vibrant green when I planted it and I anxiously awaited the vibrant orange-yellow flowers promised during the summer. I know there is some adjustment time but began to be concerned as I noticed signs that it was not thriving as well as the Japanese Pieris I planted at the same time on the West side of the duplex, protected from the sun by neighboring building. As the weather warmed I decided to move it to the West side, to a section shaded even more than the Pieris. I hoped that the new environment would be the right place to flourish and grow. You can see in today’s image that it seems much happier in this new location.

Some of the flowering plants I have in pots love the hot days and direct sun. My favorite summer plant, Ruellia brittoniana (also called Desert Petunia, Mexican Petunia or Purple Showers), recommended by Tad, owner of Seatonville Greenhouse a few years ago, will produce and drop gorgeous purple flowers every day. While it loves the heat and sun, it requires daily watering, sometimes twice. Gardening experts will advise to water deep but not daily, but I have learned that it depends on the plant. Each variety requires different care.

Today’s Gospel, for the Fifteenth Sunday in Ordinary Time, is the familiar gospel of the sower and the seeds. Jesus shares the parable of the farmer that scatters seed, seeds falling on the path with no soil to sprout, rocky soil not deep enough to establish roots and encourage growth, thorny soil that choked out the tender seed growth, and rich soil that allowed for growth and abundant crops. Of course, it’s a lovely analogy for our spiritual lives and the soil we tend to allow a vibrant relationship with Christ.

We are the gardeners of our lives. We choose, consciously or not, the environment that will allow for growth or choke it off. The things we think, the content we consume (online or written word), the people we choose to spend our time with, and the time and energy we allow for learning new things become the garden of our future. Some days might feel like nothing is progressing, circumstances might look and feel like failure, but perhaps we just need to tend to the “soil” to encourage growth, like my Potentilla needed a new area to allow for growth.

We need the right soil, sunlight, mindset and circle of friends to support us on our journey of becoming who we want to be and what we hope our lives will become. I have always been an introvert (at the heart of who I really am, regardless of activities and involvements) and I know people perceive that I am becoming even more so. But as I reflect on it, I believe it is just being more selective about the things and people I spend time with. I want to do things and be with people that add value on my journey, and allow me to do the same for them.

I am carefully watching some weeds creeping up on some flowers in a flower bed. I hurt my wrist, after a fall in the flower beds earlier this week, so I have to tend to healing but I know that if I don’t get those weeds removed soon they will choke off the other plants. What are you spending your time on? Are they activities that inspire you and lift your spirits? Take stock of the people you are surrounding yourself with, are they supporting and encouraging you?

Seeing the results you want in your life takes attention, time and daily care. Check in on your “garden”, how’s it doing?

Wishing you abundant peace and growth this week, Deena

Featured

An ongoing hope

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, America's Semiquincentennial, Every day Catholic, Fourth of July, Freedom for all, Ongoing hope and dreams, Spiritual JourneyLeave a comment

I have been so inspired this weekend by services, celebrations, and writings regarding our nation’s 250th anniversary that it seemed more fitting to write my “Sunday blog” today, Saturday, the 4th of July. As I drove on the highway Friday evening, traveling home in the rain, watching nature’s fireworks in the form of lightening, I reflected on the Interfaith Service that I watched on Friday morning. I was so moved by the content I wanted to revisit it this morning, sharing thoughts on it, as well as Pope Leo XIV’s letter to the American people. You can watch the entire service from Washington National Cathedral on YouTube. It is worth the time to watch, as you are able. I will provide the link, along with one to Pope Leo’s letter, below.

Today on July 4th, Pope Leo XIV, issued a letter to the American people on the semiquincentennial. He said this anniversary “marks that defining moment in the history of the United States of America, July 4, 1776, that gave enduring voice to the ideals of liberty, equality, the pursuit of happiness, justice and democratic self-government. For two and a half centuries, generations of Americans have worked together to carry these principles forward — through sacrifice, service, innovation and civic participation. This anniversary stands as an invitation not only to celebrate the nation’s remarkable journey, but also to reflect upon the responsibilities that the sons and daughters of this country bear to one another, and to the generations who will inherit the nation that is being shaped today.” Pope Leo spoke of the importance of our many rights and freedoms, the right to religious freedom, the right to and support of the dignity of all human life, and continued efforts in support of the common good, building a world where there is a “commitment to the promise of freedom, justice, opportunity and democracy.”

Pope Leo also said, “Defending human life also includes welcoming, protecting and assisting immigrants, whose hopes, sacrifices and contribution have formed part of the history of this country from its very beginning. In every generation, those who have arrived seeking freedom, opportunity and a place to belong have helped to shape the nation’s character. To receive them with compassion and generosity is not only an act of charity, but also a recognition of the dignity that belongs to every human person.”

I am not naive to the fact that there have been issues with open borders in our country. I respect the fact, and the process, that allowed my grandparents and great grandparents come through and register at Ellis Island. But I cannot comprehend situations like the Venezuelan couple, who both worked at Amazon, whose son learned martial arts last summer, being detained and deported. They applied for asylum in the US and complied with the US Immigration check-in and processes. In June, they were advised to leave, by August 15, or be detained. They opted to leave but then were detained anyway during a check-in last week. The husband was sent to a separate detention facility than his wife and son, in Venezuela. That building was destroyed in the earthquake and he was killed. We must continue to fight for a more just and charitable way to support those seeking a better life in the United States. We are so much better than this!

Reverend Randolph Marshall Hollerith, the Dean of the Washington National Cathedral, said in his opening of the Interfaith Service on July 3, 2026, that the service seeks to celebrate 250 years of the American experiment, “to lift up the hope and promise of our nation, and to remember those who have given so much for the freedoms we now enjoy but to be honest about the promises of this nation that are still unfulfilled.” He said that “the American experiment is an ongoing project and that all of us together have work to do.” The entire service was a commemoration of good as well as less than desirable moments in our country’s history and treatment of others. It reflected with hope on the dreams that we began with and the goals that we continue to fight for.

I was moved by the opening entrance with a woman playing a moving Native American flute composition. It was acknowledged that the Cathedral was built on land that belonged to Native peoples and the Great Spirit prayer was offered that we “seek strength, not to be superior to my brother, but to fight my greatest enemy, myself.”

The majestic Star Spangled Banner, along with other prayers and speeches or written documents by Americans over the course of 250 years were poignant, not avoiding difficult topics in our history, but by remembering them celebrating our constant pursuit of justice and a better way for all in our continual quest for life, liberty and pursuit of happiness.

I was moved deeply by segments of the speech by Lyndon B. Johnson to Congress, on March 15, 1965, called “The American Promise.” I remember vividly this time in our history, my young moral and social conscience being formed by what I was hearing in the news. But I did not have a sense of the depth of the change that President Johnson was calling for in our country. President Johnson began, condemning the violent acts in Selma, and said, “Our mission is at once the oldest and the most basic of this country: to right wrong, to do justice, to serve man. In our time we have come to live with moments of great crisis. Our lives have been marked with debate about great issues; issues of war and peace, issues of prosperity and depression. But rarely in any time does an issue lay bare the secret heart of America itself. Rarely are we met with a challenge, not to our growth or abundance, our welfare or our security, but rather to the values and the purposes and the meaning of our beloved Nation.”

It reminded me that in our 250 years we have had many times of upheaval, times of despair and hardship, and yet, a call to seek a nobler way of living together and living up to the ideals on which we were founded. What we do, together as a nation, has so much more to do than personal gain, national economic success, or superiority over other countries. We set a standard for others, personally and internationally. Johnson said in this speech, “For with a country as with a person, ‘What is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?'”

The founding words of our country still stand as a test for us today. We may have moved past the (to some degree) of North/South, black/white problem of the 1960’s that LBJ was addressing but we must move beyond right/left and Democrat/Republican, hostilities of our own day, in support of “a promise to every citizen that he shall share in the dignity of man. This dignity cannot be found in a man’s possessions; it cannot be found in his power, or in his position. It really rests on his right to be treated as a man equal in opportunity to all others. It says that he shall share in freedom, he shall choose his leaders, educate his children, and provide for his family according to his ability and his merits as a human being. To apply any other test–to deny a man his hopes because of his color or race, his religion or the place of his birth–is not only to do injustice, it is to deny America and to dishonor the dead who gave their lives for American freedom.”

If we each desired to live our lives to the ideals that we remember today, to each of the goals that President Johnson ended his speech with (“I want to be a President who…”), and with a continued hope in freedom for all, I hope and believe we will see a change in the mood in our country and a unity that we have experienced in the past. Idealistic? Perhaps. But I would rather live my life with that hope and dream. I hope we can join together in that pursuit.

Happy 4th of July! Deena

Link to Interfaith Service at Washington National Cathedral: https://www.youtube.com/live/zunAWyeyYVw?si=8FuB3nkZ9LORe1ds

Link to Pope Leo XIV’s letter to the American People: https://www.vatican.va/content/leo-xiv/en/letters/2026/documents/20260625-lettera-anniversario-usa.html

Image: One of my finished blocks in a 9-month patriotic stitch-a-long project, designed by Teresa Kogut. I am currently working on the Liberty Bell.

Featured

Embracing the questions

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, A life worth living, a school of God's service, Benedictine Oblate, Coming home to myself, creative well-being, Every day Catholic, hope and healing, lifelong learning, mental wellbeing, mindfulness, Personal call and vocation, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, seeing beauty around me, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, Trust the journey, visionary faith2 Comments

A couple of years ago while pondering the persistent question, “what am I going to do with my life”, I finally realized I should stop asking and start living. I laughed and told myself, approaching 70 years of age (not nearly as close to it as I am today), it was time to stop trying to figure that out! Maybe there isn’t an “it” to actually discern in life. Over time, and considerable contemplation, the question morphed into “what am I being called to do, right now – this year or this day?” It’s a minor shift in wording but a huge shift in perspective.

It has felt like a shift to embracing the questions, rather than struggling with them. A fiber artist that I follow shared some thoughts on her own questions and reminded me of a quote by poet, Rainer Marie Rilke, “Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms and like books that are written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given to you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now.”

Deanne concluded her own pondering by saying that she thinks we are all “wonderers”, and that she had yet to meet someone who doesn’t ask questions of life. She said, “And we are all a wonder. And that is what life itself is. It is a wonder too. And so now nearly each day I remind myself to ‘Let the mystery be’ and to ‘Love the questions'”.

I couldn’t agree more!

In a movie, “The Gardener”, that I watched this week, the protagonist facing illness and her mortality, begins to open to beauty around her and to seeing life with new eyes. She is mesmerized by a snake that has shed its skin. She gazes on an agave type plant that only blooms once then dies. She mentions to a mysterious teacher that shows up on her journey, that she feels that death looms around her, she questions when the mortal fear stops. He responds, when you are ready for it to.

It’s easy to get caught up in the struggle and miss the mystery unfolding around us each day. If we are ready to release the grip and tight hold on the questions, then perhaps we are able to see things with curiosity instead. We can find wonder and awe in life unfolding around and for us. As I shared some thoughts on the book, The Practice of the Presence of God by Brother Lawrence, last week, it seems more fitting to be present to what we are called to in each moment. That is what brings peace and contentment in life.

The image I selected for today’s post is a tile of the shell marker pilgrims see on the various Camino paths on “the way” toward Santiago de Compostela. The shell serves as a directional guide letting pilgrims know they are on the right path. For medieval pilgrims, a shell would be a purposeful tool, to drink or eat from. For those of us who follow a Christian path, a shell vessel is often used during the sacrament of baptism, to pour water on the infant or individual being baptized. It is a sign of rebirth and divine protection. I purchased this tile, as well as a sterling shell to wear on a necklace while visiting Santiago de Compostela. They both serve as good reminders to watch for “markers” and continue on “the way” each day.

Wishing you abundant peace, wonder, and awe this week. Deena

Note re the movie The Gardener: before you search for the movie directed by Dabney Day, it was a special online release this week. It was a little bit Devil Wears Prada in the beginning, Hallmark throughout but a few lovely spiritual reflections throughout.

Featured

The practice of peace

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, A life worth living, a school of God's service, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, contemplation, Every day Catholic, hope and healing, lifelong learning, mindfulness, ora et labora, Our unique call, Pope Leo XIV, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Saints as Models & Guides, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Teachers and Guides on the journey, visionary faith1 Comment

Have you found yourself irritated with others, or with life/the world, because events weren’t turning out as you had hoped they would? Maybe it’s more than a hope, but an expectation, that circumstances should be different. We (me!) can stress and worry about situations in life, but frequently find we have little control over it. As a reaction I often retreat, inwardly, or even physically, to my inner being, and home, preferring silence and solitude. My desire is to keep a constant connection with Spirit, throughout the day, focused on the things that really matter instead of the mundane and passing concerns that can consume so much time and energy. Some days are easier than others.

I have to catch myself when the repeated tape of a conversation, or of the behavior of someone else toward me, begins to rewind over and over again. I laughed out loud this morning reading a post by personal development author, life coach, and speaker, Cheryl Richardson, as she described the thoughts going through her mind as she took a shower. She stopped herself and said “Cheryl, come back, there are too many people in this shower with you!” I replied, “Girl, I hear you!” I laughed thinking of the countless times I have been in the same situation.

I have been encouraged in my practice of being in the presence of God, more mindful of Spirit and connection, as an alternative to mindless worry over past or future events, as I have been rereading a book by Brother Lawrence from the 17th century, Practice of the Presence of God. I was encouraged to read this small book in the 1990’s, along with Abandonment to Divine Providence, written in the 18th century, by one of my parish priests. Both have been helpful books on my spiritual journey. Lately, I have been using an updated translation by Ascension Press, which has been much easier than reading the original book I have. The book has gained much popularity after Pope Leo XIV wrote an introduction to a Vatican edition of the book, indicating that this book was one of the books that has shaped his spirituality and awareness of knowing and loving God. Pope Leo has advised that the journey of practicing the presence of God, is an arduous one because we have to renounce all of the other things that seek our attention, so that we can keep our focus centered on God.

And isn’t this the goal of Christian mindfulness, and a practice of centering prayer and contemplation? We desire to turn away from the clamor and noise of the world seeking inner peace and union with the Divine.

Brother Lawrence advises that we turn away from everything that distracts from that union, so that we can be in constant conversation with God. We pause, we turn to and rest in the Divine Presence. Simple but challenging. We seek to empty ourselves of the things of the world, from anything that does not lead to God. Brother Lawrence approached all his duties and responsibilities within the Carmelite monastery in this way, as an opportunity to practice the presence of God.

Just as Brother Lawrence had his tasks to complete, so do we. Practicing the presence of God does not mean we quit work, give up enjoyable hobbies and activities, or retreat to a monastery. I do find it is easier having fewer responsibilities outside of the home, but even those activities become opportunities to serve and be aware of God’s presence as we undergo them and encounter others in the process of doing them. It brings a different perspective to our engagement in them.

While the “practice” Brother Lawrence speaks of reminds me of Ignatian spirituality, finding God in all things and seeking only those things that bring us closer to God, he did not seem to be concerned with guidance from others, except in sacramental confession, or considering consolations and desolations in spirit. He simply returned his gaze to God and to the things that would be pleasing to God, despite any suffering or distraction.

With a similar message, Pope Leo XIV, in his video message to the 50th Summer Youth Conference in Steubenville, Ohio this weekend, encouraged youth to look for peace, for “true and perfect joy”, in the love of God instead of from others, or from social media and other electronics. He pointed to the life of St. Francis, and the peace Francis found, and shared with others, that looked different, and less appealing, to others, until they encountered him. They experienced the peace that he found within, in his relationship with God and a focus on lasting joy and happiness.

I hope that as I continue to practice the presence of God, less concerned with the opinions and actions of others, I will find that same level of peace and joy experienced by Brother Lawrence, Francis, other saints and mystics, and those who have followed them. I pray that this peace is experienced by others who I encounter. It’s a lofty goal to be sure, but one worth remaining committed to.

As always, I wish you abundant peace this week, Deena

Today’s image: a small wall hanging I purchased in Assisi, Italy. Pace e Bene means “peace and all good” or “good peace”.

Featured

Wistful summer memories

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, A life worth living, Coming home to myself, contemplation, creative well-being, Doing what we love, Every day Catholic, mental wellbeing, Our unique call, Pause and rest, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, savor the days, Spiritual Journey, Trust the journey6 Comments

Last night I noticed the first firefly (we called them lightening bugs growing up) of the season. I paused and watched, there was another, and another. I moved to a different window, opened it wide and watched them as they moved around the back yard, around the tree and plants in my flower beds. Soon, my cat, Butters, jumped in the screened window and watched them too. His head darted back and forth as each one lit in the landscape below.

I watched in delight. I inhaled the balmy summer evening air with birds still chirping, but more quietly than earlier in the day. The evening was calm, fewer cars and noise than usual. It was a picture perfect summer night.

I began to reflect on summer evenings of my youth. Nights on the front porch, growing up in a neighborhood where it was common to sit outside and visit. On occasion, after our baths, and dressed in pajamas, we would go for a ride to The Root Beer Stand for an ice cream treat, bugs buzzing under the canopy lights, as a car hop would bring a tray to the car window.

We vacationed in Wisconsin many summers while I was growing up. I can recall only a handful of memories from those summers. I remember the deer we fed by hand. Or the firetruck my father insisted my brothers and I got on so he could take a picture. I exclaimed the leather seat was too hot but he wanted a picture. I still have the photo, legs tucked up near my chin and dress pulled down over my knees. Funny how the picture takes me right back to the feelings I was having.

I attended a local summer camp, Camp Saint Claret (I think we called it Camp Claretknoll). It was a historic summer camp operated by the Claretian Missionaries on the Claretknoll property. The camp was literally a few miles from home but I felt as though we were transported to a different world. I had no idea at the time it was a missionary founded organization. I really can’t recall what we actually did there but thinking of it brings back to memory nights of campfires and scary stories.

I remember my Noni’s garden. Besides her vegetable plants, the garden border was always full of peonies and roses. She loved her garden and I know she planted those seeds in me as well. We would pick dandelion from the yard, so that she could eat the greens in salad, long before the days of chemical treatments on lawns. She taught me about picking and sautéing zucchini flowers.

I love my flowers and adding new varieties to the flower beds each year. But, I gave up gardening vegetables. After my mother died, I lost the joy. I carried on the tradition of planting vegetables, after my father died, which he took on with gusto after my grandmother passed away. Mom and I planted tomatoes, peppers, zucchini and cucumbers. Dad’s garden was always much bigger, priding himself in the lettuce, onions, garlic and sweet corn. Thinking of the garden also evokes lovely memories with my mother, grating zucchini for bread and cooking tomatoes for sauce to use all winter. Perhaps the spark will return one day.

Do you have a favorite summer memory? Or perhaps a summer tradition you grew up with and still share with your family today? I would love to hear it. You can reply in the Facebook or Instagram post, or on my website, so others can enjoy reading it.

Wishing you summer days to savor and that bring you peace. Deena

Image: With my “Noni” in her garden.

Featured

Becoming who I am

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, a life of joy, A life worth living, Benedictine Oblate, Coming home to myself, contemplation, creative well-being, Doing what we love, Life of purpose, lifelong learning, mindfulness, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spirituality, Teachers and Guides on the journey, toolkit for the spirit, Trust the journey4 Comments

Earlier this week I listened to a vlog “The Elegant Haiku” and read the accompanying blog by Michael Kroth. In his video he said something that immediately caught my attention. I stopped the video, backed it up and played it again. I wrote it down in my journal and it’s been on my mind ever since.

Michael said: “What we practice becomes who we are.”

His feature article this week was regarding his journey, learning about and writing haiku, as a daily practice. He began in 2019 as a result of attending a workshop by poet, author, and friend of ours Judith Valente (you have seen her name here in this blog many times). It may have been about the same time that I attended a retreat given by Judith at the Monastery and was also introduced to haiku. Michael decided to make it a practice. I have tried multiple times but give up. I judge, criticize, and analyze. (Frankly it surprises me that I continue to write this blog each week.) Michael’s haiku poetry is very good. He and friends even published a book, Framing the Moment; Haiku Conversations, together after sharing their haiku with each other.

Haiku is a form of Japanese poetry, consisting of three lines, in a format of 5-7-5 syllables. I have seen multiple variations or adaptations but most use this format. It sounds simple but I would invite you to look outside, or at an image, and capture the essence of it, or how it makes you feel, using that format. It challenges us to find just the right words to express a feeling or insight. It calls us to slow down, choose carefully and purposefully. It is way to be present and mindful.

In one of Judith’s latest books, How to be a Contemplative (also mentioned by Michael in his blog), she shares her wisdom about slowing down in our hectic, often distracted, lives. If you are challenged to wind down at all, much less write a three-line haiku, I invite you to explore Judith’s book.

In addition to incorporating a practice, or desire to learn something, in our lives so that it becomes more closely aligned with who we are, I believe it also creates some sort of magnetic attraction to bring more of the same to us. Since reading Michael’s post I have seen and read so many compatible posts, poems, and book titles that encourage me to pursue and stay focused on the things that point me in the direction of who I am becoming and what I desire to have more of in my life.

I have a long list of things that I would love to be better at, that feel like they express who I am or who I want to be. So, I must ask myself why I am not pursuing them more enthusiastically – fear of failure, fear that I can’t ever be those things as proficiently as I want to be, that I will be judged…? If there is one gift of rapidly approaching 70 years of age, I have noticed that I am more easily gravitating toward not caring what other people think. But, there are moments. When I sense that feeling of doing something for approval, versus authentic desire, I think I have to grab myself by the shoulders and say “move on, let it go.”

Michael might be surprised to know that I have saved a little stack of his delightful pieces of mail, that he calls Haiku Drops (today’s image of the envelopes, not his poetry), since “meeting him” at a workshop with Judith. I pull them out from time to time if I need to take a peaceful pause during the day. Other times they just make me smile when I open the drawer I have them in, and see them. My point of sharing that is that our desire to learn and share something with others might be just what they need on any given day. So, if it makes you happy, continue to pursue and practice it, and share it with others!

Wishing you endless moments of being really happy with who you are, and who you are becoming, this week! Deena

Featured

A seed is just a seed

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, a life of joy, A life worth living, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, discernment, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, Gifts of the Spirit, Holy Trinity, Life in the Spirit, lush life in the spirit, Our unique call, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Saints as Models & Guides, toolkit for the spiritLeave a comment

This is my favorite time of year in the Illinois Valley. We had late cold and rain this Spring, so it may appear to be a bit behind the last couple of years, but the baby corn, like the field in today’s blog image, are starting to sprout. I just love these little green leaves emerging from the ground. They make my heart happy!

Inside each tiny seed, the embryo of the plant has everything it needs to grow and transform into a mature plant. But each seed remains dormant until it has the right conditions of sun, oxygen, the right temperature and warmth, and moisture to activate and cause the seed to germinate. The seeds have a life force within them, that is dormant, until the right conditions appear to cause growth. (Farmers and scientists, please forgive my overly simplistic explanation.)

Seeing these plants beginning to grow this past week, I reflected again on the spirit, or life force, within all things. This life force is “viriditas”, or “greening power”, coined by St. Hildegard of Bingen, that I mentioned in last week’s blog. My reflection and study led me to review several articles again, especially one by Nameeta Renu, theology scholar and author of numerous articles on consecrated life, “Why St. Hildegards’s spirituality of ‘viriditas’ is so extraordinary”, on a site I follow, Global Sisters Report (see note below on GSR).

Hildegard, Benedictine abbess, mystic, healer, artist and scholar, saw the living power of light, from God, in all of creation. Her art and writings reflected this “greenness” in all things. But Hildegard’s concept of greening power wasn’t a study of ecology. She wrote that the soul within each person is the green life-force of the flesh. If we, as human beings, neglect our “inner greening”, if we lose the “sap of life”, carelessness about the things that are important in life, or if we experience the “drought of our indolence,” our soul power begins to “fade and dry up”.

Today is Holy Trinity Sunday. We reflect on the dynamic Love between Father, Son and Holy Spirit. We attempt to grasp how that Love is then shared with us. Hildegard would talk about the Holy Spirit as this green “sap” within us. Like trees, the Holy Spirit is the juicy green, moist, creative life within us. Is it alive or dried up?

So a seed is just a seed, or is it? It is pure potential. It is potential waiting for the right conditions to nurture it so that it can develop in a way that it becomes what it was made to be, in the image and likeness of the plant that created the seed in the first place. Or as Hildegard wrote, “Every creature is a glittering, glistening mirror of Divinity”. We were created in the Divine image of God. We are beloved sons and daughters.

So I pause to ask myself this week if I am nurturing and watering that seed within? Am I living to my potential, daring to declare who I am (also a thought from Hildegard)? What else does my spirit need to become fully alive, lush and green? I hope my thoughts prompt you to consider the same.

Wishing you a week, and a new month, that is thriving, vibrant and full of growth! Deena

Note: Global Sisters Report is an independent, nonprofit source of news and information about Catholic sisters and the critical issues facing the people they serve. They send daily email updates or you can visit their site, Global Sisters Report. You can also find a direct link on National Catholic Reporter.

Featured

Spiritus Sanctus

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, a life of joy, Benedictine Oblate, care for creation, Catholic faith, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, Gifts of the Spirit, Holy Trinity, Laudato Si, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Spiritual Journey, spirituality2 Comments

Most of us have an image of God the Father that we grew up with, for some, a kindly grandfather, and for others, a stern judge. Jesus is even easier to imagine because of countless gospel stories, movies or even series, like The Chosen. But as soon as we think we understand either one of them, we are wrong. Our mental depictions are limited and cannot possibly grasp the entirety of who God is and the Love poured out for us. So we cling to ideas that are helpful or move us in some way. Describing the Holy Spirit is even more difficult. I once heard a priest admit that preaching on Holy Trinity Sunday is one of the more challenging theological concepts to preach on.

The Church teaches us that we only come to know and believe in Jesus because of the Holy Spirit. The Catechism of the Catholic Church tells us that the Holy Spirit is the soul of the Mystical Body of Christ (i.e., the Church, each of us as believers). The Catechism says that the Holy Spirit is “the principle of every vital and truly saving action in each part of the Body” (CCC 798)

But if you are like me, that is too lofty. I need images, analogies, music and poetry to help me grasp more difficult constructs. Each year on Pentecost Sunday, which we celebrate today, I find myself in a familiar place, with a deep desire to know and understand the Holy Spirit better, asking the Spirit to help me grow in knowledge and wisdom.

I would like to share some of the thoughts, shared in prayer or written word, that I have found helpful for this Solemnity in the Church. I can’t promise that they will guide you to a better understanding of the Holy Spirit. I believe we have to ask and pray for the gifts of wisdom, understanding, knowledge and counsel. But maybe, just as Jesus entered the locked upper room in which the apostles, and the women close to him waited and prayed, the door will be unlocked and we will emerge with a bit more peace, faith and courage to see where and how we are being guided in life.

St Augustine’s Holy Spirit Prayer: Breathe in me, O Holy Spirit, that my thoughts may all be holy. Act in me, O Holy Spirit, that my work, too, may be holy…

Pentecost Prayer from Days of the Lord for the Easter Season: “Open your hearts to the breath of God, his life is grafted to the souls that he touches; May a new people rise from the waters over which hovers the Spirit of your baptism! Let us open our hearts to the breath of God, for he breathes in our mouths, more than we do ourselves!

St. Hildegard’s writing on the Holy Spirit and viriditas, or “greening power.” For Hildegard, the Holy Spirit is the divine life-force that breathes into the universe. It is the ultimate source of energy which brings spiritual and physical health, creativity, and helps us as spiritual beings grow and flourish. Looking at her art, or listening to her chants, help me as I try to connect with this life-force. You can listen to her beautiful Spiritus Sanctus chant as sung by the Benedictine Nuns of the Abbey of St. Hildegard by clicking here.

St. Teresa of Avila (another of my favorite women wisdom guides) said that the Holy Spirit is the “living water” that helps satisfy our thirst and longing for God, the “interior master” that teaches us, guiding our prayer and helping to transform our will to align with God’s.

Litany of the Holy Spirit: “ray of heavenly light, author of all good, source of heavenly water, consuming fire…Holy Spirit, inflame us with the flame of your love…teach us to pray well.”

Pope Leo XIV, Angelus Address today, May 24, said that the Holy Spirit acts like a “mighty wind” to open doors that send us out into the world. He described three doors that the Spirit helps us open. First, faith in God himself, who grants faith and understanding in holy Scripture, which allows us to have a personal encounter with Jesus. I reflect on my experience with Lectio Divina and Imaginative Prayer, which help me hear and respond to Jesus. Second, Pope Leo said that the Church helps us with our fears and anxieties in the face of today’s challenges in the world. It invites us to be open, hospitable and loving to others in the world. Finally, the third door that the Holy Spirit open is the “the door of our heart, helping us to overcome resistance, selfishness, mistrust and prejudice, while enabling us to live as children of God and brothers and sisters to one another. Where the Spirit of the Lord is, fraternity is born among individuals, groups and peoples of the Earth, and all speak the same language of love, which unites and brings harmony despite our differences.”

This week I pray that the Spirit descend upon all of us, like dew in the early morning, refreshing our spirits and souls, helping us to grow in wisdom and understanding. I pray that the doors of fear and worry to be thrown open and replaced with a spirit of trust in God’s abundant love for each of us. I pray that the Spirit, in each of us, help us to be a people of love and care, each with a spirit that cares for the common good and well-being of our neighbors and our planet.

Come Holy Spirit, Come!

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Today’s Image: a photo taken in the Vatican of a dove with an olive branch.

Featured

Choosing joy

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, a life of joy, Coming home to myself, creative well-being, Doing what we love, mental wellbeing, mindfulness, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, Teachers and Guides on the journey2 Comments

This weekend I am participating in a virtual cross-stitch event. This is my second virtual event, hosted Lindy Stitches, and I am hooked! It includes classes, talks, virtual rooms to join to stitch together and chat, and of course, a shopping area.

I began stitching last Fall, with a free Halloween chart I have never completed. But I fell in love and wanted to learn more, so I began researching, watching YouTube videos (stitching video updates are called Flosstubes), immersed myself in the language (yes, there really is a whole lingo that tells people what you are doing and what stage of the process you are in with a project) and began buying designs, and fabrics, created by more notable names in the stitching world. I have finished some small pillows and I probably have 6 current projects in process (called WIPs) at the moment and a created a whole system of organizing the paper charts that I purchased and will begin stitching one of these days. I have a daily Book of Days that journals my stitching, purchases and wish lists. I won’t begin to tell you how many downloaded PDF, digital, files I have saved! Right now there are lots of patriotic charts available for America’s Semiquincentennial, so many of us are working on those along with other projects. I think I have three started at the moment! Yes, I got passionate about stitching! Every single day includes something related to stitching.

Saturday, listening to a “meet and greet” session with Jacob de Graf, designer and owner of Modern Folk Embroidery, and an expert in a variety of quaker, traditional, period and Frisian samplers, I heard the most insightful advice that I have been reflecting on since hearing it. While Jacob offered the advice to stitchers, I thought it is was wise counsel for us as we journey through life.

Stephanie, of Lindy Stitches, asked Jacob what advice he had for stitchers. He quickly said (and will discuss further in his class on Sunday, which I am very excited about), “don’t feel bad about your stitching, you are doing fine!” His suggestion is not compare our stitching to other stitchers or to work we have seen online. He adamantly told us not to apologize for our work, for errors we make, but to be happy with what we are doing. As a new stitcher, constantly judging the speed at which I am stitching compared to others in Facebook groups that seem to produce finished projects overnight, his perspective was encouraging. He said the important thing to ask is whether we had fun stitching and whether working on our projects is bringing us joy. He concluded by saying that if anyone attempts to make us feel bad about our work, then they really aren’t our friend, so move on and keep stitching!

I can think of countless times this week I judged my efforts, not just in stitching or other creative projects, or endlessly berated myself for making a mistake, saying something I wished I hadn’t, or for not accomplishing a task the way that I think someone else has.

Stitching, drawing or journaling, making cards, or even, gardening are things that I do to relax and that bring me joy. Jacob’s sage advice reminds me to keep my focus there. Research tells us that creative projects can reduce stress (I still have to share some thoughts from my talk on neurographic art!), which is why I continue to make time for these things each day.

Why then would I diminish the benefit of those endeavors by judging my work or comparing it to others?

Society and social media brainwash us to do so, for sure. But those of us who have sought to find our personal worth and value in the things we do, or produce, have a history of that behavior to alter and replace. I think it is time to turn that thinking around. It is time to simply find joy in the creative acts we participate in each day, whether it is drawing, stitching or other needlework, arranging flowers or making a meal. Add a garnish, make it over the top even if no one sees it. Share it with friends, real friends who support you. The image I chose for today is an art journal page I created in a class last year. It has been the cover for my Creative Well-Being page on Facebook, a page to encourage others to express themselves in creative practices.

Wishing you abundant joy in all you do this week. I hope some of it will be creative! Deena

Featured

Offline and in tune

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, a life of joy, A life worth living, Coming home to myself, Doing what we love, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, lifelong learning, mental wellbeing, mindfulness, Our unique call, Personal call and vocation, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Teachers and Guides on the journey, toolkit for the spirit, Trust the journey, visionary faith4 Comments

This weekend, as we begin this new month of May, I am on the team and participating in an aromatherapy retreat – Rooted in Wisdom, Rising in Light, hosted by my friend, Kate Brown. The speakers are skilled in their individual areas of expertise and are offering insightful and compelling insights. We are learning and experiencing many interesting new concepts and tools/processes for grounding, balancing, and raising our energy. My talk, Thursday evening, was using an experiential process of drawing neurographic art, which can help create new neural pathways to reduce stress, alter ingrained and rigid thinking, reduce stress, and promote more flexible thinking. It was entitled, Shaping your Future: Using Art and Creativity to Vision the Life You Desire. (Kate and I created a blend of Orange, Peppermint and Geranium essential oils which help with openness, clarity, harmony and heart-centeredness which we used while drawing.)

The retreat participants are staying at a lovely venue in Northern Illinois, a little over an hour north and west of my home. I opted to drive back and forth for a couple of reasons, so the days have been pretty long. As a result, I have only been online long enough to check in, create posts for the parish social media pages, Kate’s business page and read a few that pop up while I am logged in.

In all of our sessions we are talking about honoring our energy and boundaries, respecting our needs (like sleep!) and reclaiming parts of ourselves that we have have set aside while we were attending to other things and people.

As I got home Saturday evening, with a vast array of topics I could write about swirling around in my mind, I decided that taking a break this week was what I really needed.

I invite you to think about times that you keep going when what you really want to do is pause, take a break and attend to your own needs. Once you are of those situations, consider whether you could go offline, take that pause, and just tune in to your own spirit and well-being.

Take a moment, you deserve it!

Wishing you rest this week in whatever ways you need it, Deena

Image: Peace hope and love at Stronghold Retreat Center, Oregon IL

Featured

A listening heart

On By dpavinatoIn a school of God's service, a season of hope, An example of faith and hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, contemplation, discernment, Every day Catholic, growing in faith, hope and healing, Life in the Spirit, ora et labora, Our unique call, Personal call and vocation, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual desolation, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, surrender novena, The Spiritual Exercises, waiting and reflectingLeave a comment

The problem with getting hundreds of emails from authors and speakers that I follow is keeping up with them all. The amount of compelling content to read can be overwhelming each week, so I read some, scan some for the highlights, and then save for later. I recently stopped to read a blog I had saved, written by Eric Clayton, author and Director of Communications for Jesuit Conference of Canada and the United States. I met and began reading Eric’s book and blogs during my time at Ignatian Ministries. He’s a wonderful writer and I am often inspired by his essays in his weekly “Now Discern This“.

The email that I re-read was regarding a trip to the bookstore and advising his daughters that they could pick out one book, not a toy or game. Eric made a selection of three books, from all of their choices, that he thought they might like. The youngest, unamused with the concept of making a decision declared they should get them all. Eric used this as a lesson in making a choice.

Eric goes on to write, to each of us, the beauty of the tools of discernment given to us by St. Ignatius of Loyola. We must understand our limitations, he explains, and understand that we can’t have it all. We use the tools of discernment to help us align our gifts and talents with God’s will for us.

I am grateful for my time at Ignatian Ministries and our use of the Ignatian Discernment tools in every decision we made. The tools of discernment taught by Ignatian Ministries founder, Becky Eldredge, as well as authors such as Eric Clayton, Fr. Timothy Gallagher, Fr. Kevin O’Brien, Fr. Mark Thibodeaux, Fr. William Barry, and countless others, help us tune in to the thoughts and feelings we are having as we pray and make decisions. These tools, first considered by St. Ignatius of Loyola as he was convalescing from a battle injury, help us to identify “good” and “evil” spirits impacting us in our daily lives, as well as movements of consolation and desolation, we are feeling as we consider decisions or ways of responding to particular situations.

These don’t have to be used in huge life changing decisions, such as what job to take, where to move, or whether we are being called to a vocation. They can be used practically, such as Eric’s example of helping his daughters make a book purchase or in our daily prayer.

This past week I began a novena for a specific intention. It wasn’t an intercessory intention for someone in need or as stately as world peace. It was something more closely related to my life. By the third day I began to feel a sense of desolation about my prayer. I brought it to reflection during Adoration and quickly realized I had the plan all figured out. I had my request and the outcome all set. I began to “feel” God respond to me and say, “that might be the right outcome” but “let go, let me handle it. I can see far wider than you can.” At that point I changed my intention to “whatever is best…” I almost immediately felt the desolation change to consolation, and accompanying feelings of peace, calm and a willingness to hand over my request to God.

Becky Eldredge has frequently shared her insights on “Testing Desires” in her workshops. The first step Becky suggests for us helped me this week: Check the source – did it come from God, from my humanness, or from a false spirit? Next, where did the desire leave me?

I could feel in my spirit that my specific prayer was not leading me closer to God. I knew I had to let the outcome go and trust the process. I may not understand completely what I may be led to, but I feel better praying for what is best and for an outcome that will help me be the person God created me to be, rather than what I think is best for me in this moment.

If you would like a free resource on the Steps of Discernment, you can download it from Ignatian Ministries (IM) website or search the IM blog, Into the Deep, for articles on discernment, consolation or desolation. Another amazing resource, for all things Ignatian, is IgnatianSpirituality.com.

I wish you abundant peace and calm as you go forward into this new week! Deena

Photo: prayer candles at a church in Orvieto Italy.

Featured

Guides on the journey

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, A life worth living, a school of God's service, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Compassion, contemplation, Easter Hope, Every day Catholic, grounded in faith, hope and healing, Life in the Spirit, lifelong learning, ora et labora, Personal call and vocation, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Saints as Models & Guides, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Teachers and Guides on the journeyLeave a comment

Our Oblate group met this weekend for our monthly prayer and discussion group. One of the questions in our reflection guide was a quote by Esther de Waal (Spiritual writer, Benedictine and Celtic author and scholar) from her book, Living With Contradiction. The quotation referred to respecting our own solitude, revering our identity and recognizing the mystery each of us are, so that we can then recognize that in other people. The reflection question pertained to all the tools (art, music, nature, prayer, meditation, etc) and individuals that have helped us understand who we are and helped us find our direction in life.

One of our Oblates shared a lovely story how being baptized in her childhood, right before receiving her first Communion, gave her greater appreciation for the sacrament, her faith and the journey that she was beginning. It was touching, as we each shared how all of those “tools” helped us in the past and continue to nurture us today.

I left the gathering continuing to bring to mind all those individuals who at different times, and in different ways, have helped shape me as a Catholic, an Oblate, and a devoted follower of Jesus. I pondered how this Lent and Easter Season I have been growing deeper in my understanding of myself as a beloved daughter of God. It’s easy to say the words, listen to them, and read them on paper, but it’s a different story to begin to believe it at a deeper level, at a soul level. To really “know” it.

Eleven years ago today I was beginning a pilgrimage journey to Spain and Portugal. I recall fondly how my friend, and our spiritual director for the trip, shared love and concern for us, desiring that we each grow closer to God spiritually. as we journeyed physically through the beautiful sites we visited. Visiting the sites of favorite saints, such as St. Teresa of Avila, St. John of the Cross and St. James helped me connect on a deeper level with them because it was felt emotionally as well as physically by being in the places they walked, taught or are buried. Those guides, physical and spiritual, forever changed me.

These journeys we take in life, physical, emotional, and spiritual, shape us, for better or worse. I wonder how I might have altered the experience of different times in my life if I had recognized more fully the love that God has for me. How might life have been different if I had a better understanding of the depth of that love, respected myself in my actions because of who I belong to and was more amazed at the mystery of who God created me to be?

It’s easy to get caught up in, or distracted by, all of the events of the world around us. I spotted this in the disciples on the Road to Emmaus in today’s Gospel reading from Luke. Of course, they were surprised when it seemed that Jesus, who they weren’t recognizing at the moment, didn’t seem to be aware of all “the things that have taken place” in Jerusalem over the past three days. As they walked, he taught, guided and then opened their eyes to who he was and how everything in scripture pointed to the fulfillment of centuries of prophecies.

Isn’t it true that when we encounter a true teacher and guide on our journeys that our hearts burn in the same way as they did for the disciples listening to Jesus? Aren’t we stirred to the core when we hear the truth of who we are being called to be in life? Isn’t there a thrill of recognition when we see and hear more than we believed up until that moment? Hopefully we are moved beyond that current place we are in life and desire more, are changed to act in a different way, and desire to live life more aligned with this new way of thinking.

Spend a moment today and reflect on who one of those teachers might have been for you. How have you been transformed as a result of their guidance and care?

I hope and pray that I recognize those teachers presented to me along the way, that I listen and am transformed into being a better person as they guide and inform me. I pray this for you as well.

Wishing you abundant peace this week, Deena

Image: A garden and walkway in Santiago de Compostela, Spain.

Featured

Reasons to hope

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, A life worth living, a school of God's service, An example of faith and hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Daily Prayer, discernment, Divine Mercy, Easter Hope, Every day Catholic, hope and healing, Life in the Spirit, Our unique call, Pope Leo XIV, praying for peace, Sacred Heart of Jesus, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, Teachers and Guides on the journey, visionary faithLeave a comment

Yesterday morning my friend Kathy and I visited a couple of our favorite nurseries to look for a few of the plants that we enjoy in our gardens and pots each year. We are a bit early this year (or weather has us a bit behind here in IL) and, at one of the garden centers, there were not as many plants as we had hoped for but it was a lovely trip nonetheless. They have beautiful paths and gardens to wander, there were signs of life everywhere! Little straight shoots of hostas emerging from their winter rest, an awakening canopy of flowering ground covers, and budding branches on trees, and of course, spring blooms of bluebells, hyacinths and tulips! It’s a magical visit there every time but is a reason to hope as all new growth begins to come to life.

Because I was gone most of the day on Saturday I did not attend Prayer Vigil for Peace called for by Pope Leo XIV in the morning US time. I am immensely grateful for the coverage and that I had the ability to listen to, and pray with, the Vigil on YouTube on Saturday evening.

As a Catholic I believe in the inspiration and guidance of the Holy Spirit, enlightening the cardinals, in their selection of a new Pope. I still recall my delight and surprise last year to learn of our first US pope. Each and every day since then I pray in thanksgiving for the selection of Pope Leo. I can’t imagine a better choice for this time in history. He has, especially in recent weeks, been a voice of reason on the world stage, calling for diplomacy over weapons and force. Given his first words to each of us, last May from the balcony of St. Peter’s, were “Peace be with you all” we might have imagined this tone for his papacy.

I found his words yesterday, April 11, to be courageous and needed, given the current state of tensions in the Middle East and other war impacted areas of our world. But I also found them poetic, profound and emotionally stirring as I listened and then read them (you can read the full reflection here, or if reading on social media, click my blog for the link).

“Prayer teaches us how to act. In prayer, our limited human possibilities are joined to the infinite possibilities of God.“

“True strength is shown in serving life.“

“We are an immense multitude that rejects war not only in word, but also in deed. Prayer calls us to leave behind whatever violence remains in our hearts and minds. Let us turn to a Kingdom of peace that is built up day by day — in our homes, schools, neighborhoods, and civil and religious communities. A Kingdom that counters polemics and resignation through friendship and a culture of encounter. Let us believe once again in love, moderation and good politics. We must form ourselves and get personally involved, each following our own calling. Everyone has a place in the mosaic of peace!“

“Brothers and sisters of every language, people and nation: we are one family that weeps, hopes and rises again.“

Pope Leo’s words lifted my heart and gave me hope. His words don’t change the current state of the world but I pray that as our voices and prayers for peace rise and become stronger, we plant those seeds around us. We cannot lose hope that together our prayers and voices make a difference!

On this Divine Mercy Sunday, Jesus entered the upper room and said “Peace be with you.” May our voices and our lives share that same message to those we encounter.

Wishing you abundant hope and peace this week, Deena

Image: a cute frog statue in one of the emerging beds at Hornabaker Gardens, Princeton IL.

Featured

We will rise again

On By dpavinatoIn a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, care for creation, Catholic faith, Divine Mercy, Easter Hope, Every day Catholic, hope and healing, Our unique call, praying for peace, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, surrender, surrender novena, Trust the journeyLeave a comment

Our Lenten observance is over, the days of the Lord’s Passion have drawn to a close and we celebrate the joy of the Risen Lord today. My heart is full and I celebrate this day with great gladness.

This Lenten Journey to the desert was a powerful one for me. I faced sadness, grief, and anger. I found the edge of my limits with certain things and was able to accept them. I stood at the cross and sat at the empty tomb of this world and what it offers us. But I found immense comfort in knowing that these things do not matter, they are not eternal.

During the Easter Proclamation, the Exsultet, at the Easter Vigil, the priest sings that Christ breaks the prison-bars of death and rises victorious from the underworld. That great and glorious victory gives us our hope today. No matter the state of our world, the moral failure of prioritizing conflict over diplomacy, war over peace, and the neglect of those in need, we have hope that it will not endure. The empty tomb gives us that confidence.

My Lenten studies helped me desire greater surrender. My journey with the Desert Fathers in A Different Kind of Fast helped me embrace “the call of the desert to let go, let go and let go some more”, knowing full well that it is a lifelong quest. As our pastor, Fr. Paul Carlson assured us in his profound homilies this Easter weekend, the worries and fears we have in life may not go away, but we can endure and move on with overflowing joy of Mary Magdalene and (“the other”) Mary as they encountered our Risen Lord and then carried that victorious message out to the world.

This morning I was reminded of a song by Peia Luzzi I heard several years ago, We Will Rise Again. I will share the link here but for those reading on social media, you will have to click the link to my blog to listen. It’s lovely. I have pasted a few verses below:

So many times I’ve looked out across the ocean, wondered what is it all for?  

So many times I’ve raised my hands to the sky, I’ve prayed for more.

(and that)  And we will rise again, we will rise again.  My people will rise again, We’ll rise.

I wish you abundant joy and peace on this glorious Easter Day, Deena

Image: A photo of prison bars taken during my pilgrimage to Venice, Italy

Featured

Go deeper

On By dpavinatoIn a school of God's service, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Christ the King, contemplation, Daily Prayer, discernment, Every day Catholic, Lenten journey, ora et labora, Our unique call, Personal call and vocation, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, toolkit for the spirit, Trust the journey, waiting and reflectingLeave a comment

At one point this past week I had the thought, a typical one for me toward the end of Lent, I would like to start Lent over, or I could have done more. But, here we are at Palm Sunday and the beginning of Holy Week. It’s the most solemn and holy week of the liturgical year and gives us the opportunity to enter more deeply into the mysteries of our faith.

Whatever we did, or didn’t do as well as we would have liked, our Lenten practices of increased prayer and devotion, fasting and sharing our resources with those in need, aren’t something that have to stop after Easter next weekend. I might not choose to be as rigorous with fasting and some of the extra devotions, like Stations of the Cross, that may no longer be offered in our parishes, but there are opportunities to continue to let these daily practices open my heart to God and consider the attachments in my life that are a hinderance in my relationship with God.

The Lenten practices that we chose have the intention of clearing away the noise and distraction, in hopes of opening my heart more fully to God. It isn’t a race to simply cross a finish line and congratulate ourselves at the end for a job well done. If I was able to create a space to enter more deeply into relationship with God, why would I close the door now?

Over the past few weeks we have listened carefully to ways in both the Old and New Testaments that people heard and responded to the word of God. To really hear it, versus just listen to it, we internalize it and let it begin to shape who we are and how we show up each day in our encounters with others and in the choices we make in life.

This week gives us further opportunity to reflect on Jesus’ message and the immense sacrifice given in complete love for us. No matter how Lent went for us, we can allow this week to be one of a little more silence and reflection. Attend your parish or church services recalling the Lord’s Supper, Passion and Death on the Cross, and then after sitting in the silence of Holy Saturday, wait to celebrate the joy of Easter Resurrection. Slow down, enter into the holiness of this week. Listen to the scripture readings and reflect on the gifts you have in life and how God has showered love on you and those you love. Reflect on how you can share that Love with those you encounter.

If Lent has not changed us, it’s not too late. This week is our chance to go deeper.

Wishing you abundant graces this Holy Week. Deena

Image: A Station of the Cross on the grounds of Subiaco Abbey in Subiaco, Arkansas visited during a Benedictine Conference.

Featured

A cry before God

On By dpavinatoIn Benedictine Oblate, care for creation, Catholic faith, Compassion, Daily Prayer, Every day Catholic, Lenten journey, ora et labora, Our Lady of the Way, Our unique call, Pope Leo XIV, praying for peace, Sacred Heart of Jesus, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Saints as Models & Guides, Spiritual JourneyLeave a comment

This week my 4th Week of Lent journey with a Different Kind of Fast by Christine Valters Painter was to fast from holding it all together and embrace tenderness and vulnerability. I don’t know about you but when you are not feeling 100%, that kind of openness and sensitivity comes even easier. It seemed that no matter where I turned there was a story that resulted in an easy flow of tears. Our practice this week was to resist the demand to keep pushing through when your heart (and in my case this week, also my body) is crying out for a pause.

It seemed this openness attracted even more stories that pulled at my heartstrings and resulted in a pause of compassion and benevolence. A concerning personal update, reasons to stop and assess my all too frequent judgements, a friend’s family member hospitalized and on life support after a fluke accident, prayers for the daughter of a social media friend who became ill while studying in Italy, endless stories of children and families impacted by the war, a cat that was returned to a foster home after the traveling pet owners decided they couldn’t properly care for him (who is expressing his displeasure and fear openly), and another one, locally, who was placed in a shelter due to military relocation. If it wasn’t for the recent death of Bela, I might have considered bringing her home, but tears at PetSmart quickly helped me realize I don’t want to open myself to that kind of attachment again.

Christine Valters Painter shares in our Lenten study, a statement by Orthodox Christian theologian John Chryssavgis: “Tears and weeping indicate a significant frontier in the way of the desert. They bespeak a promise. In fact, they are the only way into the heart.” St. Ignatius of Loyola, Christine states, told us that the tears make us more attentive to the longings of our hearts. In other studies I have learned that St. Monica was known to weep daily for the conversion of her son, St. Augustine. Those tears obviously bore much fruit. St. Catherine of Siena, a personal favorite, was known for her gift of tears that were seen as a sign of her sensitivity and compassion.

I found myself pausing on the verse, as I prayed our Lectio with John 11:32-35, crying with Mary, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” It was a fitting passage for this week because today, the Fifth Sunday of Lent, we heard this gospel of the death and raising of Lazarus. Pope Leo XIV reminded us, today during his Angelus message, that this gospel is an invitation to hear the Lord’s call to new life, reminding us we get lost looking to the world in things that will never bring true happiness, that we are longing, in fact, for the infinite.

After this Angelus message and prayer, Pope Leo once again called for an end to violence, reminding us we cannot remain silent. We cannot ignore, he said, that what is harming those who are impacted by war and violence is harming us all. He urged us to persevere in prayer, reminding us that war is “a scandal to the entire human family and a cry before God.”

It might feel safer to pretend it isn’t happening and imagine that life is just fine, ignoring the news and tragedies occurring in the lives of our brothers and sisters. Or we can risk the compassion of Jesus, weeping at the death of his friend, embracing tenderness and vulnerability for those in need. We share our tears with those shed by others and make a cry before God for peace in our lives, personal and global.

I pray for peace in our hearts and in our world. Deena

Image: A photo I took of a stained glass window of our Lady with the body of Jesus being removed from the cross, in the chapel above the Holy Stairs, Scala Santa, in Rome. These stairs are believed to be the stairs leading up to the praetorium of Pontius Pilate in Jerusalem that Jesus had to climb several times before his death.

Featured

Pray for peace

On By dpavinatoIn Benedictine Oblate, care for creation, Catholic faith, Daily Prayer, discernment, Every day Catholic, Lenten journey, Our unique call, Pope Leo XIV, praying for peace, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Saints as Models & Guides, UncategorizedLeave a comment

I begin by stating that I understand and support the notion that we create internal peace by staying out of negative and political social media posts, staying away from the news except to remain informed, or worrying about a war that we have absolutely no control over.

I get it, I really do. I am trying hard to create peace internally and in my small sphere of influence. I continue to write in my journal, as I have for months, that each day is going to be my peaceful day and I focus on that goal each day.

But when I see a little boy crying in a Lebanese hospital because he was bombed and saw his father in pieces before him, I also know we cannot hide from the reality of what this evil war is doing to innocent people. There are times we must speak out and defy what is happening. It is not making our country safer, richer or better off. I don’t need to share all the information about what is happening each day and how much it is costing our country. You can read that on your own.

I join Pope Leo XIV appealing to “those responsible for this conflict: cease fire!” I join him in asking each of us to look at what is happening with the eyes of Jesus. In today’s gospel for the Fourth Sunday of Lent Jesus cures the blind man. We can open our eyes or keep them shut. Pope Leo also said, “It takes a vigilant, careful and prophetic faith to open eyes to the darkness of the world and bring the light of the Gospel to them through commitment to peace, justice and solidarity.”

Speak up when you can. Support those in need in whatever way you are able. Vote to make a difference.

Most importantly, let us pray for peace in our world.

Deena

Featured

Go sit in your cell

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, Benedictine Oblate, Coming home to myself, Daily Prayer, discernment, Lenten journey, mindfulness, Our unique call, Pause and rest, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, visionary faithLeave a comment

When asked for a word of wisdom, Abba Moses, one of the early desert fathers, told the seeker “Go sit in your cell, and your cell will teach you everything.” The journey of Lent is one of going within, engaging in disciplines that help us see, hear and respond more freely to the call of the Christ. This week I was called deeper into the desert.

After picking up the remains of my cat, Bela, on Tuesday, I felt a desire, and an inner call, to greater solitude. I needed space to process grief on many levels, not just losing Bela. I picked up some groceries, advised a couple people who needed to know that I wouldn’t be participating in “normal” activities for the remainder of the week. I turned within. I did have some text or phone conversations as needed, did some required social media posts on sites I post for, but spent the week reading, reflecting and journaling. I created a personal and private retreat in my home. Just like entering a silent retreat and questioning whether I would be able to gracefully encounter the time in silence, Wednesday morning I questioned what I was doing, I “should be…” Fortunately those temptations were met quickly and I easily fell in the rhythm of my self-created retreat.

When we set aside time and space for reflection, it’s amazing what shows up. Or perhaps, the quietude invites greater attention to the world as it always is around us, without a blur of motion, internal and external. For most of us the mind is a turbulent ocean, or sea, waves crashing and distracting us all of the time, but when the waves calm down we can see into the depth of the sea more clearly.

I was invited again this year to imagine receiving an empty clay bowl from Abba Arsenius, another of the early desert fathers, (Retreat: A Different Kind of Lent) as I had been given in the past. In the bowl we can visualize all the activities that fill up the bowl each day, distracting or addictive behavior, and then intentionally empty the bowl to create a spacious place to receive what is more life-giving.

Not everything I read or encountered was spiritual or faith reading. Most was. I also listened to a discussion by an author and life coach, Cheryl Richardson, who I followed more closely several years ago, but have been tuning into more frequently lately. She offered simple self-care wisdom during these challenging times we are experiencing. (These were offered in a quite humorous and sarcastic way, such as eat more sugar, make sure you always have your phone so you don’t miss a social media post, read every comment on them, and of course, stay up late each day!) I felt a longing for activities, or information, like that from my past. Things that were authentically me, things that inspired, shaped and formed me. Somehow they became “less spiritual”, a bogus assessment of where one is capable of experiencing God or Spirit.

I stitched – if you have stitched, crocheted, knitted or maybe even done puzzles or diamond art, you know it can become a method of quieting the mind. A stitch in, and a stitch out, can shape a slow pace for mindful breathing. It can become a way to let go, creating a framework for a quiet pause.

St John of the Cross said, which was often shared and made popular by Trappist monk, Thomas Keating, “Silence is God’s first language. Everything else is a poor translation.” In stillness we can hear what is more essential. Nothing I “heard” or read this week was an earth-shattering revelation, but I was awed, and grateful for, the insights that did form throughout the week. Like the Samaritan woman in today’s Third Sunday of Lent gospel, I have been at the well thirsting for a drink. This week, during my quiet pause, I was given a long, cool, refreshing drink.

It’s not practical for me to be able to retreat completely like that every week but I can certainly create more quiet spaces each day. I also want to continue to assess that my daily activities are done from a place of desire or service, not expectation. If any of this sounds inviting to you, perhaps you can consider some time in your day for a sacred pause to turn within and listen.

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Image: my purple bowl, a visual to remind myself to fill it more consciously and lovingly with things that matter.

Featured

A fragrant, pleasing offering

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, a thin veil, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, contemplation, Every day Catholic, Lenten journey, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, visionary faithLeave a comment

I have seen the cloud of incense, representing our prayers, burn and move in interesting ways around the altar in our church. During the incensation, after exposing the Blessed Sacrament, the incense rises to the great high ceilings, lifting our prayers. Impacted by heat or air conditioning, air coming into the sanctuary from opening doors, etc. it can often create a cloud around the altar and monstrance.

The other night, during Adoration, the incense took on a life of its own, and a symbolism, that was quite moving for me.

The cloud hovered around the altar and the monstrance, creating a thin veil, inviting me to see beyond the physical to the reality of what was present before me. It sanctified the space for the Divine Presence with us. It slowly moved to the ambo, the pulpit, where the Word of God is proclaimed, as if to say, as the apostles heard in today’s Gospel, Listen to him. Then, it turned and drifted to sanctify our presence there. The cloud drifted out toward the pews, at the perfect height of those of us present and kneeling in this sacred space. It moved slowly from the altar, over each of us, as it moved towards the back of the church.

The Jewish Tabernacle, or Mishkan (dwelling place), initially portable, moved to more permanent structures with the building of Jewish synagogues. The scrolls are now housed in the Ark, the Aron Kodesh, while the building itself can be viewed as the Mishkan. In Exodus, the Jewish people were instructed to build an altar of acacia wood in the Mishkan which would create a pleasing altar for the burning of incense. Everything in the Tabernacle, each piece of furniture and the way it was constructed, represented intimacy with God. The altar of incense then represented the prayers of the people rising, in intimacy with and love of God.

The large thurible, or Botafumeiro, at the Cathedral in Santiago de Compostela was not swung during my visit to Spain but I have seen videos of it during special liturgical feasts. It is swung to purify the air, participants and symbolize the prayers of the people rising to God. If pilgrims happen to arrive to the Cathedral on these special holy days, after walking the Camino, I envision the incense sanctifying their journeys, lifting and receiving all the intimate and personal prayers said during their pilgrimage.

In the book of Revelation we also hear of bowls of incense. The angel was “given much incense to offer with the prayers of all the saints on the golden altar before the throne and the smoke of the incense, with the prayers of the saints, rose before God from the hand of the angel.” It’s a beautiful image to consider the continual burning of incense, representing the prayers of the communion of the saints, small “s”, each person in the eternal presence of God.

As I reflected on the background of incense, and the scriptural references of our prayers like incense, I thought about our Lenten prayers and practices as fragrant and pleasing offerings to God. I pray to become a more pleasing “Mishkan”, a dwelling place, and enter into greater intimacy and union with God.

I pray that your journeys continue to be fruitful and meaningful as we begin this Second Week of Lent. Deena

Image: A picture I took of the great Botafumeiro in the Cathedral in Santiago de Compostela, Spain, visited during my pilgrimage.

Featured

Led into the desert

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, a thin veil, Coming home to myself, contemplation, discernment, hope and healing, Laudato Si, Lenten journey, Life in the Spirit, mindfulness, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, Trust the journey, waiting and reflecting1 Comment

In life we are led to places we don’t want to go. I have struggled with a thousand questions this week, none of them with life-giving answers that help me in my grief. The desert provides a vast and stark landscape, with few distractions, so we have room for answers to emerge. I am learning that the answers will have to emerge, in their own time, they do not break through as a result of my willing it. Perhaps that is why we are given the symbolic period of 40 days in our own Lenten journeys to mirror the days that Jesus was led into the desert to pray, fast and be tempted. We need time to “rediscover what our hearts truly desire when the distractions fall away” as so beautifully stated in the opening of the Laudato Si’ reflection for the First Sunday of Lent.

What I desired for Lent was to enter a desert time to be free of the distractions that were filling my time with things other than prayer and reflection. Now the distraction of all my questions is consuming my time, impacting the desire for prayer and reflection, even more than going out for coffee would have done.

Given the temptation of changing this situation, just like a rock into a loaf of bread, I would probably say “yes”, change it. I would not be strong enough to resist the temptation. I want Lent to be different than it is.

If you are finding you have a similar mindset as you look at the distractions in your own life – wishing to change circumstances to be a person more centered in prayer and meditation, to be a person of peace and lovingkindness and more compassionate towards others, to want to give more of your time to those in need – you are not alone. I hope for each of us that the desire for these good works is in itself a grace. As also stated in the reflection by Laudato Si’, the distorted desire for the things (my add – of the world, more fleeting in nature) that are pleasing becomes a distraction, they fragment us, not free us.

This weekend in my journaling and reflection I read something written by Rainer Maria Rilke that I am trying to sit with. He invites us to “have patience with everything unresolved” in our hearts and to love the questions. “Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given now, because you would not be able to live them. The point is, to live everything.” I must have hope in that, to live with the questions so that the answers slowly emerge as part of living into them. Just as I have hoped by writing my “peaceful day” statement every day for months is a slow drip of water smoothing the jagged edges of my heart, I have hope in this guidance by Rilke.

Let each day be what it is. Lean into the questions. Hold hope that they are all part of a larger transformation taking place.

Wishing you a week of peace and hope, Deena

Image created in Canva

Featured

Lenten solitude

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, Catholic faith, contemplation, Lenten journey, Life in the Spirit, mindfulness, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, surrender2 Comments

When I started this post last weekend I had decided that journeying to the desert, both spiritually, and physically was a way to grow closer to God. Spiritually Lent is full of images of the desert and of turning away from the temptations of the world. Physically I had decided to “stay in” during these 40 days, to not spend money on coffee or dinners out, in the hopes to clear more time and space for prayer. Never in my imagination did I think the beginning of Lent would also be an emotional journey of emptiness, exposure and piercing loneliness.

As I said goodbye to my sweet boy, Bela, yesterday, I have been in a place where the sun is scorching and there is no protection from the winds of grief as they stir up minute upon minute. There is no cover and no place to hide. The ashes this morning certainly had a different symbolism and reminder of how fleeting life can be. For some, the (almost) 18 years I have cared for Bela may not seem fleeting. For others, the grief may not be understandable for “just a pet”. But from the first moment Bela chose me and this home, he has been so much more. But that may be a story for a different day, when I can find the joy in telling it.

Preparing for Lent initially, I reflected on the Covid pandemic and how sheltering in place was like a journey to the desert. We had to leave behind our routines and stay home. We ordered judiciously, or ventured out rarely, to prevent unnecessary trips to the store or for delivery people. I helped set up our online parish evening litanies and live-streamed Masses. I attended other virtual retreats and prayer events. It became a time, for me, full of the richest spiritual blessings and graces, at a time of so much pain and fear for others. I was not blind to the difficulties for others, but as an introvert (yes, really!) I relished staying home and participating in virtual events. I had the cats for company. I had more time to contemplate life and my faith and I treasured the depth of experience that I was having.

Like the Desert Fathers and Mothers who opted out of normal activities and retreated outwardly to the desert so that they could retreat inwardly toward God, I desire the same kind of solitude during these 40 days of Lent. It’s not a complete withdrawal because I can and will attend Masses, Stations of the Cross, as well as other Lenten prayer and scripture groups in person. I will be facilitating a Lenten group discussion as we read and pray with Crux, by Ascension Press (see note below). But, what began as a desire to be more intentional in that quiet time changed dramatically yesterday. It is a different quiet time that I am receiving than what I desired. What remains though, is time for personal prayer and reflection, a space to lean into scripture searching for words of comfort, and to practice mindful breathing and being present to each moment, even if that moment is filled with grief and a call to surrender to the crashing waves of those feelings.

If you choose to be intentional about the experience of Lent, I would ask what one thing you would like to retreat from during these 40 days? Would it be possible to do that, by carving out the space for more personal time for prayer and reflection? How might you change Lent from simply focusing on the discipline of “giving something up” to a change in your relationship with the distractions of world? I would love to hear from you and how it goes for you during Lent.

Also, a word of thanks to all of you who took the time to reach out via text or to comment on my post about Bela this morning. I haven’t been able to read them yet, but just seeing the updates has brought comfort. I think I will be able to read them tomorrow, until then, I am so grateful!

Wishing you a holy Lent with time to be open and receptive to the voice of the Spirit, Deena

As a note, Crux is available on the Ascension Press app with a discounted rate of $4.99 for 90 days of access. There are daily videos with Fr. Columba Jordan, Lenten challenges, prayers and reflections.

Image: a bird that Bela and I were watching from the window on Saturday. He seemed so peaceful by himself, a fitting image for my Lenten journey.

Featured

A pause, with love

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, a thin veil, care for creation, Compassion, mindfulness, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Spiritual Journey2 Comments

I was preparing my post, focused on Lent today, and the day has required a different focus. My oldest cat, Bela, is not well today. It seems it may be getting closer to his transition. So my attention is on him and not writing. I am quiet and attentive, as I hope I will be this Lent. Since Lent begins Weds., with Ash Wednesday, I will finish my post and publish at that time.

I am so grateful to Kate Brown (Kate Brown Healing Essentials), taking time during her Sunday rest, for her Healing Touch for Animals work on him today. He is more relaxed and attempting to rest in the sunshine.

I wish you peace and love on this lovely Sunday. I hope it’s as beautiful where you are as it is in Illinois today.

Photo taken during a visit to Muir Woods in California

Featured

Start with a dream and dream big

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, a life of joy, A life worth living, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, discernment, Doing what we love, Dream big, Every day Catholic, Ignatian prayer, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, mindfulness, ora et labora, Our Lady of the Way, Our unique call, Personal call and vocation, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, savor the days, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom2 Comments

I love the Opening ceremonies of the Olympics, and the Winter 2026 Opening Ceremonies did not disappoint (ok, it’s in Milan and Cortina, so I might be a bit biased). I loved it all – Andrea Bocelli, the dove image and message of peace, the adorable Italian hand gesture lesson, the all female color guard in Armani suits, the colorful flowing paint tubes, dancing composers and, (seriously? How creative and representative of Italy!), giant colorful moka pots, I was thrilled.

Beginning with a sequence of the winter athletes watching their younger selves practicing their sport was an inspiring first segment for the Ceremonies! Having watched young people grow into adulthood, in my own family, with their specific goals and ambitions, and achieve those dreams is equally inspiring. I paused to reflect how some people are so inspired at a young age to pursue a goal, and the relentless practice to accomplish it. It’s a gift to be so confident and determined.

On Friday I was reminded that we are all encouraged to dream big. A reflection by Monk Mindset challenged me to consider that we would never tell a young child to dream mediocre dreams, to aspire to goals that are “less than” what they might desire. We don’t tell a child, or at least I hope we don’t, not to dream big because it is grandiose or presumptuous to want to accomplish something in life. My niece’s 7 year old has mentioned she wants to be a Lego Master. So why not?! She’s immensely talented at it and there are such individuals called Lego Masters in the world. Whether that comes to pass or it morphs into some other creative, and equally talented, skillset of planning, designing and creating, it doesn’t matter. I want to encourage her to believe in that dream! I would not dare to tell her to focus on something less exciting!

Fr. John of Monk Mindset continued to suggest that we might spend some time in prayer and discernment about the deepest desires in our hearts. It reminds me so much of Ignatian Spirituality and the notion that God is discovered when we spend time reflecting on the desires of the heart. In true discernment, we explore those desires that are ordered toward God, that lead to greater faith, hope and love of God. In that discernment we will uncover something that God might intend us to desire and pursue. When we have identified a spiritually noble and ambitious dream, then we have to courage to ask God to aid us as we run confidently toward it.

These dreams would not be petty desires or visions of grandiose and self-promoting accomplishments. Fr. John reminded that we need to be open to and allow room for purification and alteration of those desires toward the will of God in our lives. In prayer and contemplation, we weed out the disordered attachments and desires and seek those that best use our gifts and talents to serve God and others. I always thought, why would God want me to be an accountant when my heart does not move in that direction. So I don’t have to fear asking God what ways I can best serve.

I was also reminded, seeing a recent post from Hay House, that Louise Hay, an author and founder of Hay House Publishing, began her life’s work late in life. After a divorce and cancer diagnosis she began to write and at the age of 62 opened her publishing company, which remains a leader in the world of self-help and personal fulfillment publications. Do I desire to open a publishing house or author several books? No, but perhaps some of the other ideas that I lay in bed and dream of deserve a bit more reflection, prayer and discernment.

We can all make a difference in the world by using our gifts and talents. What are your dreams that lay dormant? Spend some time this week and reflect on ways that your future might be as grand as God imagines for you.

One of the best commercials I have seen so far is by Toyota with young girls repeating positive affirmations from their father in a car. The tag line is “Every destination has a beginning.” What’s your destination?

Wishing you abundant peace and joy this week, Deena

Image: created in Canva

Featured

The journey of peace

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, A life worth living, a school of God's service, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Compassion, Daily Prayer, discernment, Every day Catholic, hope and healing, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, mindfulness, ora et labora, Our Lady of the Way, praying for peace, Sacred Heart of Jesus, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Teachers and Guides on the journey, Trust the journey, visionary faithLeave a comment

In today’s Gospel from Matthew (Matthew 5: 1-12a), Jesus gathers his apostles, and the growing crowd of disciples and followers, and shares the familiar Beatitudes with them – these words shared are a radical blueprint for the heart for those of us searching for answers. Although I’ve heard these verses many times, they spoke to me with a new weight this year. Ever since the Vigil Mass on Saturday, words like ‘peacemakers,’ ‘persecuted for righteousness,’ and ‘hunger and thirst’ have been nudging me to spend more time with them. What am I being called to do? How might I move beyond hearing the words and make them become a part of my life? What is my role to help embody the words at a time when our world needs more light and peace? I don’t have the answers, so I have gathered a few favorite quotes from many that I respect and turn to for wisdom, with a prayer that they might help me understand the words Jesus is calling us to live. I also share a personal example at the end of how we are invited to reflect on our own journeys.

As a Benedictine Oblate, I begin with St. Benedict and the peace he advocates in our daily living of The Rule, from the Prologue: “Let peace be your quest and aim.”

Pope Leo XIV, yesterday in his address to participants at the “Political Innovation Hackathon: One Humanity, One Planet” Conference, said “there can be no peace while humanity wages war against itself—by discarding the weak, excluding the poor, and remaining indifferent to refugees and the oppressed.” He said “Only those who care for the least among us are capable of accomplishing what is truly great.” He urged the young people to seek peace always.

Dorothy Day: “If peace is to be built, it must start with the individual. It is built brick by brick.”

St. Mother Theresa: “If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.”

Anthony deMello: “Peace is not the absence of conflict, it is the ability to handle conflict by peaceful means.”

Thomas Merton: “We are not at peace with others because we are not at peace with ourselves, and we are not at peace with ourselves because we are not at peace with God.”

Thich Nhat Hahn: “Peace in every step.”

Lastly, I share the personal experience from my reflection during Adoration this past Wednesday on the Buddhist monks walking for peace. I prayed to let their walk continue to plant seeds of peace in my heart. That they might encourage me to spread a message of peace in my own way. I contemplated the number of people they are influencing by their walk and their daily messages. I continue to write in my journal each morning, “Today is going to be my peaceful day.” I paused and thought about others, like the Peace Pilgrim, who have journeyed for peace. Then God reminded me he has a sense of humor and is listening to all these silent prayers and yearnings.

I reached down and picked up my copy of the new book, Encounter Grace: Moments of Hope, Joy and Peace, by mentor and friend, Becky Eldredge. I opened and turned to pages 36 and 37 and read the two reflections “A Call” and “Healing Power”. In “A Call”, Becky wrote that we are invited to pray for the grace of getting to know Jesus more intimately as we journey through the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius of Loyola. “It means not only hearing the call to follow Jesus but also to WALK with him and be there working with him.” Then in “Healing Power”, Becky reflected on the ways that Jesus healed others and the impact it had on her. She invites us to consider that it is through our connection with Jesus in our “inner chapel” that “his power moves from him to us.” When we do that, we “encounter Jesus the same way Jesus encountered people tangibly when he was WALKING around the earth.” (Using caps for both quotes here is my emphasis.) I laughed out loud, quietly because I was in Adoration, but I thanked God for reminding me of Jesus’ constant effort to be and share peace. I can turn to scripture just as easily as I can turn to YouTube to see where the monks are walking today.

So today, in whatever way is most helpful for you, consider how you are and might be sharing a message of peace to those around you. We all need it so desperately.

Wishing you abundant peace this week, Deena

Image: A photo of a banner at Subiaco Abbey in Subiaco, Arkansas taken during an Oblate conference.

Featured

Make me an instrument of your peace

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, A life worth living, a school of God's service, a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Compassion, Every day Catholic, hope and healing, praying for peace, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, Trust the journey, visionary faith, waiting and reflecting2 Comments

It’s hard to find words. But I have one, Enough! I saw a post this morning that calmly pleaded, if you have a platform use it. Mine is a small platform but I want to share my prayers and hopes.

I pray for peace. I pray for the people of Minnesota and an elimination of the fear and injustice they are experiencing. I pray for children, like 12 year old Max with a soccer medal around his neck, crying to his mother that another boy told him he was going to be arrested, because they look different even if they were born in the US (and I share Max’ tearful sentiment, “it’s just not nice”). I pray for other states that are beginning to experience the same insane use of discrimination. I pray for our country and a restoration of the values we have held dear for so long. I pray for the honest police, military and elected officials who desire to uphold the laws of our country. I pray for leaders, religious and civil, to step up and do what is right. I pray for a restoration of respect between other countries and the United States. I pray for each of us as we struggle to find a balance between staying informed, knowing what and when to speak up, and still maintain respect, peace and hope in our hearts and minds and with each other.

Please know that this is no longer, if it ever was, about legal deportations. We’ve had those conducted by past administrations and not heard about them. Why? Because each person was given due process. This is also not about legit law enforcement and military doing their jobs. I watched law enforcement calmly arrest clergy and interfaith leaders who were protesting at the Minneapolis-St. Paul airport on Friday. I did not see guns drawn, pepper spray or harassment. This is about unlawful and unjust discrimination and bigotry. It has to stop.

So, today, I turn to one of my favorite prayers, attributed to St. Francis of Assisi. I pray it so that the words make a home in my heart and mind so that then I can, in turn, sow love, pardon, faith, hope, light and joy in my small way.

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace:
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
where there is sadness, joy. 

O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console,
to be understood as to understand,
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive, 
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned, 
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.
Amen.

Please dear God, hear our prayers.

I wish you abundant peace, hope and calm this week. Deena

Image: art of St. Francis taken during my pilgrimage to Assisi.

Featured

In the beginning

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, A life worth living, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Compassion, Daily Prayer, Every day Catholic, grounded in faith, hope and healing, Life of purpose, mindfulness, Our unique call, Personal call and vocation, praying for peace, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, seeing beauty around me, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, Teachers and Guides on the journey, Trust the journey, visionary faithLeave a comment

The Center for Action and Contemplation in New Mexico, published a series this past week on Creation. Each week, Fr. Richard Rohr’s (Franciscan priest and founder of CAC) writings, as well as those of other writers, poets and theologians, are shared in a daily blog. Each day, this week, has challenged me to reflect on creation as an ongoing act of God’s love. Recent events have weighed heavily on some of us. Yet, in the midst of turmoil, there have also been moments of great peace and tranquility, solidarity and hope. Those stories might be harder to find, but they are there.

If you read the Bible, especially the early stories in Genesis, it’s a mess! Lies, deception, betrayal, thousands of Israelites defeated in battle, and exile. We know these stories were passed down to preserve an ancient heritage and the wisdom gleaned through that history. These words carry a truth that despite all of the sin and error committed by our early families in faith, an ultimate truth remains. As Fr. Richard wrote, this story shared through generations “is saying that everything is grace, everything is gift, everything comes from God. God is the one who makes something out of nothing and gives it to us, not only then, but now. God created both the natural universe and our own human nature, and all of it is good. All of it is to be enjoyed, if we can receive it as a gift.”

Brian McLaren’s article in the series invited us to remember that all of creation is good and that in that creation, all matter and each person, are part of the story and are different branches on the tree of life. Later in the week, theologian Elizabeth Johnson shared a more poetic perspective, that existence itself is an ongoing act of God’s love, and that “without the ongoing creative power of God at every moment, all would collapse into … an unimaginable no-thing.” She stated the “Creator gives with great affection; creatures receive. Nothing in the great world would exist but for this constant relationship.”

We are rereading the newer (2010) translation of Sr. Joan Chittister’s commentary on The Rule of St. Benedict in our monthly Oblate gatherings. Sr Joan, in the section on the Prologue of The Rule, which has guided monastics for well over 1,500 years, proposes that in “failing to respond to God everywhere God is around us, we may lose the power of God that is in us.” We have all been failed by the things of this world, the people in our lives, leaders both personal, local and national, security in our work and our homes, things that will not ultimately satisfy us. God is the only “lifeline” when nothing else fulfills and satisfies, and when the world feels to be imploding, it is comforting to remember the source of all goodness continues to create out of love for us.

I do not suggest that a solution is ignorance of current events. I am inspired by those who choose to more actively represent, and speak out for, the just and equitable principles that our country was founded and has been guided by. But when I feel myself reacting with rage and condemnation, I remember the words I reflect on each morning and evening, from the venerable monks walking for peace, unless we have peace in our hearts, we will never have peace in the world. So I pause, mindful of the present moment, and turn inward. I reflect on the warmth of the sun through the window, the tea in my mug, and I send a silent prayer, a prayer for peace in my being and a peaceful solution to what is happening in our country.

I can’t think of a better way to pray for and reflect on the drastic change needed in our country today, than on the eve of Martin Luther King Jr. Day, to share one of his most famous quotes, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that.”

May we be light. May we embody peace. May we be a seed in the ongoing act of creation. May we be a source of inspiration to those seeking answers in a world that will never provide them at the deepest level. Amen.

Wishing you abundant peace and hope this week, Deena

Photo: A recent sunset, a visible sign of the glory of creation.

Featured

Guide our feet into the way of peace

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, a life of joy, A life worth living, a school of God's service, a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Christmas Peace, Coming home to myself, Compassion, contemplation, Daily Prayer, Every day Catholic, hope and healing, Life in the Spirit, mindfulness, Our unique call, Personal call and vocation, praying for peace, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, Teachers and Guides on the journey, toolkit for the spirit, Trust the journey2 Comments

In the very first paragraph of the Introduction of Joan Chittister’s book, The Monastic Heart, she asks “Where do we go now as individuals to find our way out of the shadows and toward a new light?” She says that each of us have within a desire to be more of ourselves, to figure out what is being asked of us when the “pressures of our time seem insoluble and our inherent energy begins to fray.” Her answer to these problems of the world, or the unsettled spaces within our spirit, is monastic living. “Monasticism is the single-hearted search for what matters in life.”

But don’t despair, you don’t have to run off to a monastery to live a life guided by monastic principles. You do it where you are, as you are, but guided by different values.

Granted that isn’t always easy. As a Benedictine Oblate, I have promised to live by monastic values and The Rule of St. Benedict. But, this week has tested my ability to see Christ in the other, to allow solitude to bring calm and clarity when inside my thoughts and feelings are tumbling, and to be thoughtful in speech, knowing what to say and when to say it. Thankfully support comes from many places, most especially during this Christmas season.

Christine Valters Paintner, author and online abbess of Abbey of the Arts, described the “inner monk” in her weekly email this morning. Christine said “The ‘inner monk’ seeks God as the source of all being, searches for a mystical connection to the divine source, longs for what is most essential in life, and cultivates this through a commitment to spiritual practice. The monk is nourished through silence and a commitment to see everything as sacred.” Reminders such as these, to see the world from a contemplative perspective, to find mystery, wonder and awe in daily life, are critical for me, as I attempt to maintain a balance of being informed but not being pulled down in a pit of despondency and hopelessness.

I don’t have blinders on by any means. As a monastic, a Benedictine Oblate, we aren’t called to that. But, I can only watch a limited amount of news (or videos as the case was this week) before I feel it getting too heavy for my spirit. I have chosen updates from sources I trust. I prefer these updates from political historians, like Heather Cox Richardson, or award winning journalist, who worked for 60 Minutes and National Geographic, Jeff Newton. People that have the experience to back their perspective. Although I will also admit to enjoyed the clever, daily updates from Pasture Politics, a farm from Upstate New York. I have no idea of his background, (will admit it’s closer to my political views and not unbiased), but it’s innovative and captivating.

Joan Chittister, in The Monastic Heart, says that “every moment of social tension needs a peacemaker.” But the “truth is that only one thing can really bring peace: the commitment not to destroy other people’s sense of self, of dignity, of value in the name of truth.” That makes keeping up on social media difficult. Every post brings deep and cutting responses, full of malice, contempt and an attempt to demean versus state an opposing opinion. It’s sad. It’s uncalled for. It will not bring peace.

This past two months I found another source of inspiration for compassion and peace, besides my daily prayer and reflection. My friend Maribeth shared with me the journey of the Buddhist monks (@walkforpeaceusa on Facebook) walking a 120 day, 2,300-mile journey from Fort Worth, Texas (the home of their monastery) to Washington D.C. Their only goal is to raise awareness of peace, loving kindness and compassion. It is not to raise money, to convert people to Buddhism, or to mention any specific national event or ideology. I listen to their talks daily and have never once heard an unkind or judgmental statement. This week I had a deeply personal involvement with their journey. Two weeks ago, when Mari and I saw that they would be nearing her home in South Carolina, I asked her if she was going to attend. We began following their daily schedule. I encouraged her to attend, and hoped she would. I said given more time to plan, and care for my cats at home, I would have picked up and flown to make the journey with her. She did attend and after capturing videos and special moments at the Saluda County Courthouse, and accepting a peace bracelet for me from a monk, she admitted to me that the only reason she attended was for me, but was glad that she did have the opportunity to be with them. My heart was overflowing with gratitude for the gift of her friendship and for the ability for both of us to encounter the monks, even if my presence with her was virtual.

It hasn’t altered my Christian beliefs, but it has enriched them. Venerable Bhikkhu Pannakara suggests a practice, in his daily teachings, that I have incorporated into my daily journaling. It is a simple practice. It is to begin the day by writing (with pen and paper, not just thinking or typing it), “Today is going to be my peaceful day.” It is simple, easy but powerful. It helps me desire peace before being exposed to or consuming the thoughts of others or letting thoughts of worry or fear hijack my day.

Imagine if our first thoughts were of peace and if we wished for others what the monks wish for all in each and every post they make on social media; May we be mindful in everything we do throughout the day. May you and all beings be well, happy and at peace.

By the way, a local news channel recorded the Saluda talk. It’s a bit soft and hard to hear at the beginning but well worth sticking with it. It is a wonderful summary of all they are sharing on their journey. You can find it by clicking here. This was the event that Maribeth attended.

As I pray each morning in the Benedictus, I wish and pray “In the tender compassion of our God, the dawn from on high shall break upon us, to shine on those who dwell in darkness and the shadow of death, and to guide our feet into the way of peace.” Amen.

Wishing you abundant peace and happiness this week, Deena

Featured

Go by another way

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, a life of joy, a school of God's service, a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, contemplation, discernment, epiphany, Every day Catholic, Ignatian prayer, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, Our Lady of the Way, Our unique call, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, Trust the journey, visionary faithLeave a comment

I sat down this morning to do social media work I have been hired to do, before starting this blog, and I heard a bird calling. It wasn’t the typical wrens or sparrows of the morning. It was clearly not cardinals or blue jays I hear in adjacent neighborhood trees. It’s too early for robins. It was distinct, different. I immediately got up to find it, in the front yard, or in my backyard tree. I couldn’t find it but I kept looking as it kept calling out. It stopped me from doing anything else, I couldn’t resist the invitation.

I wonder, as I reflect on the wise men in today’s Epiphany story, if these magi had the same urgency to respond to the unique star they were seeing, seeking the important event it was foretelling. It’s easy to ignore those inner promptings, whether as simple as the little bird I heard, or as illuminating as a distant star. We pass them off as impractical ideas or a passing flights of fancy.

Sometimes the way will find you, even if you go another way.

This Fall I listened to a talk, either by Fr. Bonafice Hicks or Sr. Miriam Heidland (my journal notes weren’t clear as I looked back), and a reference to a new book by Bishop Eric Varden on Chastity and how chastity, and Bishop Varden’s description of chastity, speak of a reconciliation of senses and a love of beauty. I had listened to Bishop Varden online in the past, and enjoy his teaching, so I ordered it immediately. Once it arrived, and I attempted reading, I quickly realized I was in over my head. I set it aside. I picked it up again at a later date and came to the same conclusion, I was not going to get the point so easily captured by the review I listened to.

During a recent homily, my pastor spoke of Bishop Varden, so Friday I dropped off the book, thinking he might enjoy reading it and would certainly be a better student of the concepts than I was. I consider myself fairly adept at spiritual literature and theological teaching. Not an intellectual, but also not completely amateur to spiritual reading. After all, St. Teresa of Avila, St. Catherine of Siena, St. John of the Cross aren’t kindergarten reading and I enjoy spending time with their writings. I handed over the book as well as any hope of being able to understand it.

Friday night I was listening to a daily session of Minute Monk on the Hallow app, led by John Cannon, founder of Monk Mindset (a website but also a paid app released in 2025). The reflection was given by Fr. John on the Feast of Saints Basil and Gregory. He began talking about the Tools of Good Works in the Rule of St. Benedict and the love of chastity. He described chastity, not as an absence of sin, but as a good desire, a virtue, a mark of a human being fully alive. He then referenced Bishop Varden’s book on Chastity. I literally laughed out loud given that I handed over the book earlier in the day.

Ok, God I am listening, I exclaimed. Where are you leading me?

The summary was an excellent one, much like the one that led me to order the book in the Fall. Fr. John continued to describe chastity not as a list of do’s and don’ts but as an re-establishment of wholeness. It restores our senses to see and truly love, is a marker of integrity and allows us to see the world in truth, to have a contemplative spirit. It leads us to be more clearly attuned to our ultimate purpose of loving God and others.

For clarification for those who might be confused about chastity versus celibacy (a vow or state of being to remain unmarried and chaste), chastity is a broader virtue of having fidelity, sexually, to one’s state in life, whether being married or unmarried.

The instance wasn’t for me a reminder of living a chaste life, but instead was a reminder of living a contemplative life, focused on love and compassion for others (Compassion is my chosen “word” for 2026). It was a reminder that being free of other responsibilities, I have desired a life dedicated to prayer, contemplation and monastic virtues. But lately I have questioned how I have been living that commitment. How deep is my love of others when I react harshly, with judgment, to those I encounter? Am I seeing Christ in the other?

This morning, the USCCB social media pages, released a reflection on the Feast of the Epiphany by the Most Rev. Ronald Hicks, Archbishop-designate of New York and Bishop of Joliet. Even though he is Bishop in the nearby Diocese of Joliet, I have learned more about him recently as he has been introduced to the people of New York. He talked about how his experience of living in Central America transformed him, his experience of the people and the culture, changed him. He said that when he encounter Jesus and his word, in scripture, and the sacraments, when we care for others, we go home by another way. We are changed and we are challenged to carry that Light, that we have experienced, out to others.

Let it be so.

Wishing you a week of abundant hope and joy, Deena

Image: a photo of a sunset, a moment of beauty.

Featured

The story of our families

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, A life worth living, a school of God's service, a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Christmas Peace, Daily Prayer, discernment, Doing what we love, Every day Catholic, Family Stories, grounded in faith, hope and healing, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, Our Lady of the Way, Our unique call, Personal call and vocation, Pope Francis, Pope Leo XIV, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, savor the days, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Teachers and Guides on the journey, Trust the journeyLeave a comment

I have been reflecting this morning on the journey of my grandparents from Italy to Ellis Island, then on to Illinois. My grandmother was born, on this day, December 28, in 1898. She met my grandfather during the war. He traveled here first to get a job and then my grandmother came after. They had three children here. My grandmother lived, caring for her young children after my grandfather’s death, by first working in a factory and then in later years sewing for others. My other grandparents lived in the area as well, after migrating from Slovakia. My great-grandfather died in the Cherry Mine Disaster in 1909, when my grandfather was a young boy. The family name was changed for ease of describing who people were and where they came from while they worked, so the last name on one of the few tombstones in the Cherry Cemetery represents the area in Slovakia that he came from and then the name that became our family name here in the United States.

During the holidays I also recalled so many wonderful family occasions with aunts and uncles that are no longer with us. All families with struggles and accomplishments, just like any other family. My mother and father worked hard, in a variety of occupations, to provide for us. We moved from Illinois to upstate New York then back to Illinois again as my father followed his career and then desire to open his own business. My mom, a nurse, ceased her career to work alongside my father for over 25 years.

I am sure you have similar stories and history. Parents trying to provide for and do the best that they can for their children. Perfect? No, not by any means. But the family that we are one with and come from, the families that make us who we are, for better, or motivated to change. If you don’t know, or haven’t shared your family story, make a point to do so. There are so many details that I wish I had now, but they are gone with the memories of those who held them. But I am grateful for countless images captured in photos, like the one I share today, before we stored everything on our phones.

Today we celebrate the Feast of Holy Family, a young family also journeying in life, with Joseph doing his best to care for his little family. December 28 also recalls the death of the Holy Innocents, the young boys massacred because of a cruel and jealous king who couldn’t stand the thought of someone having more authority than him. The message that Joseph received, to flee to Egypt, saved Jesus from this horrible persecution.

Today, Pope Leo XIV reminded us that the world “has its ‘Herods,’ its myths of success at any cost, of unscrupulous power, of empty and superficial well-being, and it often pays the price in the form of loneliness, despair, divisions and conflicts.” He asked us to pray for all families suffering due to war and violent conflicts. We can pause and pray for all those families who, like our own families, are trying to find a better place in the world to live and flourish.

So today, reflect on the family that helped form you into the person you are today. Tell stories and share memories, so that they are passed on. If you are lucky enough to have them, spend time with old photos and recall family celebrations and gatherings.

Then as Pope Francis wished in his 2020 encyclical, Fratelli Tutti, “Let us dream, then, as a single human family, as fellow travelers sharing the same flesh, as children of the same earth which is our common home, each of us bringing the richness of his or her beliefs and convictions, each of us with his or her own voice, brothers and sisters all.” (No. 8).

Wishing you abundant joy and peace with the family memories that you hold, Deena

Featured

Christmas Peace

On By dpavinatoIn a season of hope, Catholic faith, Christmas Peace, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, Pope Leo XIV, praying for peace, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, Teachers and Guides on the journey, The birth of Peace, waiting and reflectingLeave a comment

On this blessed morning I wish you peace. This morning in his Urbi et Orbi Christmas address and blessing, Pope Leo XIV spoke of peace bringing to our minds and prayers so many places in our world in need of peace. But giving us hope, Pope Leo reminds us that Christ is peace because he shows us the way to overcome all conflicts proclaiming that “today, true peace has come down to us from heaven.” “The Lord’s birth is the birth of peace.”

Let it be so in our world and in our hearts.

I wish you abundant peace and hope on this holy morning, Deena

Featured

We wait in love – Fourth Sunday of Advent

On By dpavinatoIn a school of God's service, a season of hope, advent, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, contemplation, Every day Catholic, Ignatian prayer, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, Our unique call, Pause and rest, Rest for the weary, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, savor the days, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Trust the journey, waiting and reflectingLeave a comment

Our theme this Fourth Sunday of Advent is Love. We listen to the story of Joseph’s dream and his response, with love, to take Mary into his home. We reflect on the coming Solemnity of Christmas and the love God demonstrates for all of us by sending his Son into the world. As we prepare to celebrate the coming of Christ into the world, by remembering his birth over 2000 years ago, we are invited to birth that love to others in our words and actions.

We’ve arrived, in just a couple of days, we end our Advent waiting and join the angels singing songs of praise for the birth of Jesus in our world. Do you feel prepared? Not just with all the activities of preparing for Christmas, but in your heart? Have to tried to make room each day to welcome the Christ?

I have certainly tried but each year I ponder whether I have prepared adequately, instead being too focused on all that needs to be done. So, today I will slow down the pace a bit. On this first day of Winter, I will accept the invitation to savor the longer night and reflect on my Advent preparation for the 8-day Christmas Solemnity, reflecting on the Incarnation of Jesus.

I offer these suggestions for you today as you prepare for Christmas this week:

Listen to this soothing musical Taize chant meditating on the coming of the Lord at Christmas, Wait for the Lord.

Contemplate the Incarnation of Jesus using the Ignatian prayer method written about by Becky Eldredge.

Continue our Advent daily prayer of the ancient and poetic O Antiphons (recited each day, from December 17 to December 23, as part of evening prayer in the Catholic Church) by listening to the Benedictine Sisters of Mary, Queen of the Apostles sing O Come O Come Emmanuel. Listen to it as prayer, rather than a familiar Christmas hymn, reflecting the longing in our hearts for a savior. Listen to each title for God as a plea for help, which one would you ask God for the grace of assistance this year? Perhaps O Wisdom – for guidance when confused or have a decision to make, or O Key of David – if you feel stuck or in need of a way where there feels there is none, or today’s verse, O Dayspring – help to clear the clouds of confusion, depression or grief that you might be holding in your heart.

We have a few days left. Let’s use them to prepare for this amazing gift of Love. Spend time pondering the source of every gift in life, consider the Spirit’s prompting us to share the love of Christ, and reflect on the real reason we celebrate Christmas Day, the coming of Christ into our world.

Wishing you abundant Love this week, Deena

Featured

We wait in joy – Third Sunday of Advent

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, a season of hope, advent, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Daily Prayer, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, savor the days, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality1 Comment

We have the opportunity during Advent to immerse ourselves in the poetry of the Prophet Isaiah. Today, the Third Sunday of Advent, Gaudete (“Rejoice”) Sunday is a special treat. We listen to the prophecy of a time when the desert and parched lands exult and the land rejoices and blooms in abundant flowers. The earth will be an exuberant display of the glory of God. We hear that the ailments of our human condition, being feeble, weak, blind and deaf, will be annihilated. We will sing in everlasting joy and gladness.

In a world with so much turmoil and bad news, it sounds heavenly to me! This Third Sunday of Advent reminds me to pause and realize that there can be moments like this in each and every day. Also, the Letter of St. James implores us to be patient and not complain. Some days that feels like a task, and we might have to look harder, but those moments of joy are there to be found.

We received a new blanket (a thick several inch blanket!) of snow yesterday, and this morning, as the sun rose in the frigid temperature, I gazed upon the serene beauty of the fresh snow. The world is quiet and still. The desert and parched land of my inner landscape were fortified by the peace of the morning. I felt an inner joy and gladness bubbling up within. So for today, I will not let the anxious thoughts of all that needs to be done overwhelm me. The days are busy enough. Today is a day to rejoice and replenish our spirits. Writing this, I looked around at the number of items, besides lights on the trees, that I have that light up and the peace that they bring. As I reflect in the hush of the night, or in the early morning, with all the items lit, my life feels so peaceful and my soul finds the quiet stillness that Advent invites us to savor.

So, I invite you today to find a few moments to sit in stillness. Perhaps it is simply sitting quietly and looking at your Christmas tree or listening to soothing holiday music. Pick up a daily reflection book, the Bible, or visit a website with the scripture readings for today and slowly read and reflect on Isaiah 35: 1-6, 10. Pause and read the words again. Where might you find a glimpse of that joy today?

Wishing you abundant joy this week, Deena

Featured

We wait in peace – Second Sunday of Advent

On By dpavinatoIn a season of hope, advent, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, contemplation, Daily Prayer, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, Pause and rest, praying for peace, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, savor the days, seeing beauty around me, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, toolkit for the spirit, waiting and reflecting2 Comments

Today is the Second Sunday of Advent and our candle lit today is the candle of Peace. The candle represents the peace that Christ brings to our world. In our time of Advent preparation we are invited to slow down and reflect on our lives. We contemplate and search for the peace that only Christ can bring.

Are you slowing down? Do you feel peace? I have to admit it is taking a conscious effort for me to slow down and savor the Advent season. I am behind my, probably unimportant and self-established, goals of where I wanted to be at this point in December. Rushing and to do lists can take over and get me frazzled in just a second if I let them. To resist that unrest I stop for little moments, and practices, in my day to remind myself to pause, such as reading and reflecting on many of the resources I shared with you the week prior to Advent (see the post for November 23 if you need some ideas). If I feel the anxiety rise or I find my mind wandering in prayer, or at Mass, I stop and repeat “Jesus, my soul waits for you in stillness” (a phrase repeated this Advent in the Hallow app Pray 25 program). Just a slow focused breath with that simple prayer can help reclaim calm in the moment.

Stepping outside can help too. I had to drive to my cousin’s veterinary clinic this week to pick up meds for Butters, and as much as I fretted over the drive each way, it gave me drive time to listen to one of the Advent programs, to pray, and just look at the fields and the sky. I caught sight of a cloud iridescence, a sun prism, as the sun bounced against ice crystals in the air and clouds. Then a skein of geese flew overhead happily on their way to a field or water. The brightness of the sun against the snow covered fields lifted my spirits from worry and concern. It was an unanticipated hour of calm in my day. You may not feel like you have time to take a drive, or simply a walk, but it might just be what you need!

As we listen, or read, the daily scriptures this month we journey with the Old Testament prophecies of the coming Messiah and on Wednesday of next week (December 17, the beginning of my favorite part of Advent, the “O Antiphons”) we listen to the infancy narratives as we recall the journey of Mary and Joseph to Bethlehem. All of these are meant to help us recall the historical event of the birth of Jesus but also an annual, and personal, review in preparation for the Second Coming of the Christ.

I pray that these scriptures over the next two weeks help you enter into a few moments of peace rather than anxiety, calm versus disquietude. Let us slow down and remember what we are preparing for.

Wishing you abundant peace this week, Deena

Featured

We wait in hope – First Sunday of Advent

On By dpavinatoIn a school of God's service, a season of hope, advent, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Daily Prayer, discernment, Every day Catholic, grounded in faith, growing in faith, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, Our unique call, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spiritualityLeave a comment

Today is the First Sunday in Advent, the beginning of the Church’s liturgical new year. We begin the year with reminders of the promises of God and with cautions to put aside works of darkness and to stay awake and be ready. We begin the year waiting, not celebrating.

There are certainly different kinds of waiting, some easier to bear than others. We can be excited waiting, as we would waiting for the birth of a child being born to loved ones or excited waiting to leave on a vacation we have been planning. We might feel anxious waiting if we are waiting to hear from the doctor after having tests done or when we sense a change coming to a job due to corporate restructuring. We can wait with nervous anticipation to hear about a job that we really want, sensing that we did well during the interview. I suppose there are as many ways that we wait as there are the personalities of each of us. Waiting isn’t always easy. We all handle waiting differently and as I heard Dr. Arthur Brooks, one of my favorite leadership speakers and authors, say recently, we don’t wait well. We run from waiting, distracting ourselves with our phones, TV or other preoccupations.

Advent waiting is different. Sadly, it is a waiting that often gets muffled and diminished by the preparations for more secular aspects of Christmas such as shopping, decorating and parties. As Advent begins we are invited to look within and prepare our hearts. I haven’t gotten to most of my Advent reflections yet today but one posed a question that stopped me from moving through the morning with a careless disregard for the season that begins today. If this Advent was the last one for the world, or for me personally, would I be ready?

As Christians we do wait with hope in a world that is better than the one we live in. We hope for endless bliss, anticipating the joy in the presence of the God we profess to believe in. But if I wait in hope, I must stop and ask whether I am living a life that reflects hope in God’s eternal promise? Do I live with joy and peace even during the trials that appear in my life? Am I spending my time, money and relationships that reflect my belief that all is gift and that I possess those things as a steward, treating them as the fleeting possessions they are? Do I live with generosity for those less fortunate? Do I make choices that reflect my beliefs and share those beliefs with others?

Advent doesn’t have the same penitential aspects that Lent has but we are invited to spend time each day to look within and assess how we’ve been doing. In whatever little ways we are able, let us wait in hope as we listen to God’s promises, we reflect on the narrative of the coming of Jesus in the world over 2000 years ago, and we review our lives in relation to the beliefs we hold and profess.

If you need suggestions for this Advent, please see my blog from last week with a list of resources, online or book format, that you can use for your daily reflection.

Wishing you a abundant hope in the promises of the Christ this Advent, Deena

A special note of thanks to each of you who have been reading and following me as I begin the fourth year of this blog, whether you began in 2022 or recently. I appreciate your support and that you have read and commented, whether personally or publicly, about my musings each week. It has meant the world to me. May peace be with each of you, and our collective community, as we begin this new year.

Featured

Preparing the way

On By dpavinatoIn A life worth living, a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Christ the King, contemplation, Every day Catholic, grounded in faith, growing in faith, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, Our unique call, Pause and rest, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, The Spiritual Exercises, waiting and reflectingLeave a comment

The Feast of Christ the King, the final Sunday in the Church’s liturgical year, gives us a reason to stop and pause and ask how important Christ is in our lives. The Feast acknowledges Jesus’ authority over all of creation, including us. But do we live with that in mind? As we end the liturgical year this week and prepare, during the four weeks of Advent, for the celebration of Jesus’ birth over 2000 years ago, are we giving the same attention to planning for Advent that we give planning our preparations for Christmas celebrations and family gatherings?

This week I’d like to offer some suggestions of a variety of books and virtual programs you might consider for your prayer and reflection time during Advent. With the speedy shipping of Amazon, you have plenty of time to order and receive books. Online programs are even easier. (If you are reading this on social media, please visit my website for the links to all the programs, online resources and books.)

Hallow – the #1 Christian and Catholic app for prayer, meditation, and music has planned an Advent program, Be Still, starring several actors and well-known Catholic teachers, which will journey with Mary and Joseph to Bethlehem. It will be “a journey into the Christmas story as it truly was.”

Ascension – The Ascension App will be offering Fr. Mike Schmitz’ Advent program, Waiting Well. You can listen to the program with a 7 day free trial or a 90 day subscription for $4.99 (new subscribers only, otherwise 8.99/mo). To find out more, click here.

Ignatian Ministries – In addition to a virtual retreat (Advent Light: Finding Hope in the Word Made Flesh) on Thursday evening, December 4, I am delighted to see that an individual prayer resource I helped to create during my time at Ignatian Ministries, Living Into Advent, is still on the website and available to purchase and download. It offers daily scripture and reflection questions.

My spiritual director for the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius and her colleague at IgnatianRetreats.com are offering a free 8 day Advent retreat, Follow the Way of Hope, Peace, Joy, Love. You can take on your own if you are familiar with Ignatian Contemplation or arrange to meet with a spiritual director during the retreat.

Mary DeTurris Poust’s Advent and Christmas reflection book, Waiting in Joyful Hope 2025-2026, is a wonderful guide for the season. It includes Mary’s reflections on the weekday and Sunday scriptures and invites us to ponder where we are on our spiritual journey. Mary writes a reflection for a daily scripture passage and then a meditation for our personal consideration. I really love this guide and will be meditating with it each day during Advent and the Christmas.

Fr. Gary Caster’s book, The Little Way of Advent: Meditations in the Spirit of St. Therese of Lisieux, is the book we selected for the Advent Discussion Group I will be leading at my parish. Fr. Caster is a priest in our Diocese of Peoria. I used the book when it was first published. It includes readings for all three cycles of the Advent season, so you will be able to use it over again. It is available on Amazon but it now being published by, and available on, Dynamic Catholic. Dynamic Catholic also has a free online program, Slowing Down to the Speed of Joy, for Advent.

Kate Bowler is a Christian author and podcaster that I have mentioned in this blog previously. Kate and her team have put together a free program in Substack subscriptions (last two years it was a downloadable PDF) but you can also request a daily email directly to your inbox.

Catherine Smith, another author that I have mentioned in my blog, will be reading Watch for the Light: Readings for Advent and Christmas, a collection of poetry, essays, sermons, and stories by classic and contemporary authors. If you just want to listen to Catherine read and use her reflections, you can upgrade to a paid subscription to Wonder & Awe, her platform, for $5 which will only last one month and won’t be billed another month after. Catherine sends her monthly messages out via email.

I know there are probably dozens of programs you can choose from, these are just some that I am aware of and will be using during Advent. Choose one that fits you and your style of prayer and reflection. Choose one or two, whether a book or an online program, and commit to following it through Advent. Spend time each day reflecting on the real reason for the season. Today’s Feast of the Solemnity of Christ the King, and the season of Advent, can help give us clarity and direction if we pause and look inward. If we realize that our focus has been misplaced, Advent is the perfect time to recalibrate and recenter.

I hope you will join me this Advent to create some quiet time for prayer and reflection as the world tries to tell us we are behind, that we have to spend more money and that the season has to be full of activity to be joyful.

Wishing you abundant peace and hope this coming week, Deena

Image: a church visited during an Oblate conference

Featured

Embrace joy

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, A life worth living, a school of God's service, a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Daily Prayer, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, mindfulness, Our unique call, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, seeing beauty around me, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Trust the journey, visionary faith, visual creative journalingLeave a comment

Joy and happiness are emotional states that are often used interchangeably but actually joy is very different. Happiness might be found in response to life circumstances such as setting and completing a goal. Joy, science is telling us, may be experienced even amidst life hardships or uncertain times. I might not be happy all of the time, but I can experience joy regardless of what is going on in my life by being intentional about certain things in life. For me, my faith and prayer life, are huge contributors to my experience of joy.

An article published by the National Institute of Health in May of this year said that lots of attention is given, in popular psychology, to positive emotions and finding happiness while joy is still an area that would benefit from further study. A study cited, of adults ages 28-59 from the United Kingdom, reported “fostering positive relationships, engaging with nature, and cultivating self-awareness were identified as key strategies for sustaining joy.”

A study of 7000 individuals, reported by National Public Radio in 2023 as part of the BIG JOY Project, reported that “people who commit daily “micro-acts” of joy experience about a 25% increase in emotional well-being over the course of a week.” Emotional well-being was described as attributes such as better coping, less stress, quality relationships, and feelings of hope, optimism and even fun. Examples of the micro-acts of joy included gratitude journaling, doing a random act of kindness, visiting a sick neighbor, celebrating a friend’s joy, or engaging in self-reflection. The researchers asked whether doing these small acts of joy can make a difference and referred to “the ideas of the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu, who both spoke about how it’s possible to feel joy even in the midst of suffering, and to use that feeling to help do good.” Our joy, it seems, help us not only enhance our own well-being but contribute to the lives of others when we use our joy as a motivation to share with and help others in the world. I am sure we can think of others in our personal circle, or the wider circle of our communities, that could use a bit more joy these days.

Randy Taran, founder of Project Happiness, wrote in her daily email update that “joy isn’t something you wait for. It’s something you choose, amidst the struggle and in life’s tender moments, that make life worth living. Embrace the people and the things that bring your heart healthy doses of joy.” Things like buying yourself flowers, watching the sunset (or I would add, stepping out to experience the Northern Lights this past week), dancing in the kitchen or taking a long route home are some of the suggestions she offered.

Exploring the world of creativity, the impact of expressing myself in creative acts, is also a way to increase joy and mindfulness, while decreasing stress and anxiety. Creativity becomes a means to tap into my own wisdom, gain clarity in difficult situations and decrease stress, either personal situations or response to societal events. Perhaps painting, knitting or crocheting, making handmade cards, or frames like the one I posted as the featured photo, are ways that you might express yourself. A friend, Joan, on Facebook shares her creativity by posting her table settings. They are always expressions of beauty, care and love by the way she has displayed her table. I love creating little vignettes with decorations, like a Thanksgiving display, photo included on blog site, or setting out favorite seasonal items. Some of those items may evoke an emotional response, to a family member or celebrations in the past. It may just be the way the colors you choose make you feel when you look at them. All of these are ways of expressing your inner artist and creative soul.

As we move into preparing for the holidays, days that can be stressful or frantic, how might you engage in a daily micro-act of joy. What can you do each day to reconnect with inner joy or creativity, so that regardless of how holiday planning is going, you find more peace and tranquility? As we find and experience more joy, it will likely spread to those around us!

Wishing you a week of abundant joy and hope, Deena

Featured

Savor these days

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, A life worth living, a season of hope, advent, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, contemplation, Daily Prayer, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, mental wellbeing, mindfulness, Pause and rest, Pope Leo XIV, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, savor the days, seeing beauty around me, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Trust the journey, visionary faith, waiting and reflecting2 Comments

I watched one of my cats, Butters, this morning after he finished eating and was ready to settle down for a morning nap. He walked the house and looked at all of his favorite spots before settling on his blanket on the couch. I will likely join him with a blanket later today and a steaming cafe latte. It’s a good day to stay warm and cozy after the rain and snow last night and, now, the chill and cold in the air this morning.

Friday I was beginning to feel the panic of the season set in – busy days with work, church activities and errands to get done. I cleaned up the cemetery, thinking ahead to Saturday and knowing that I should clean up a variety of pots at home too. I had some bulbs to get in the ground and transplant a plant from a pot to the ground before the cold. I started thinking about the Christmas cards and shopping that I haven’t started yet. I will be helping with a pop up ornament class at the unique shop that I do social media work for, as well as working two mornings a week. November has meetings and holiday events. In December and early January, I will facilitate an Advent book discussion for my parish. I found myself short of breath thinking about it all! I stopped and reminded myself that I didn’t want these next two months to be a blur of activity and stress but rather moments of prayer, worship, family, friendship, and celebration.

Yesterday I simply enjoyed the day. I went to the gym and coffee with my friend, Kelly. Then home to clean out the pots and get the plant and bulbs in the ground, with a heavy coat of mulch. I went to Mass and then dinner with Kelly and her husband, Mark. We laughed and enjoyed our dinner and each other’s company.

It all gets done. Whatever doesn’t, probably wasn’t that important. Or better yet, focusing on being grateful, celebrating Advent and Christmas, spending time with people and making memories is what truly matters. Stress and worry doesn’t help. It also prevents us from savoring the moments as they present themselves.

I am enjoying my Thanksgiving decorations before I move into Christmas. Each night, in the house, I light my candles, lanterns and sparkly pumpkin. When I decorate for Christmas, I leave those decorations up until at least Epiphany. Since it falls on January 4th this year, I will likely enjoy them until mid-January. The merry lights and decorations help with the darkness of winter. The decorations make me happy but also bring lovely family memories with many of them.

I want to move around and make the best decision for my spirit and my well-being, just as Butters did this morning. I want to pause and savor the moment just as I did as I watched this little bird, today’s post image, as it landed in my tree this morning, swaying with the moving branches in the wind.

Maybe you are like me though, and you have to remind yourself to slow down and savor the moments. I don’t want the days to be a blur of getting things done but not enjoying them. As we move into this busier time of year, I invite you to join me in taking intentional pauses to be present, aware of the people you are with and the things you are doing. I know it’s cliche but if today was your last day, would you be happy with how you spent it? Let’s step back from the rush and hectic pace and find ways to enjoy the things we are doing and the people we are with.

As Pope Leo XIV reminded us in today’s Angelus address, we are invited to walk in “the joy of being the holy People that God has chosen” to spread the Gospel message of love and mercy through our daily witness in life. I am pretty sure being stressed out and anxious isn’t the best way to share that message. So, let us be grateful to God for the lives and people we have been blessed with. Even with daily challenges, we can find something to pause and be grateful for. In doing so, we will likely be a bright light of hope to those around us.

I wish you abundant peace and hope this week, Deena

Featured

A whispering threshold

On By dpavinatoIn a school of God's service, a thin veil, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, contemplation, Every day Catholic, grounded in faith, growing in faith, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, remembering our beloved dead, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Saints as Models & Guides, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Teachers and Guides on the journey, Trust the journey, Uncategorized, visionary faithLeave a comment

I visited the cemetery before Vigil Mass for All Souls Day yesterday (Saturday) afternoon to put small votive candles (as seen in today’s blog photo, I gave up on trying to keep real candles lit in the wind) on our family tombstones, a tradition on the evening of All Saints Day to light the path for souls and a symbol of love and remembrance. A few years ago there used to be groups praying as they visited each gravesite and many more candles. I only see a few now.

I love the tradition of Dia de los Muertos, Day of the Dead, altars with the many marigolds, pictures, food items and symbols decorating the ofrendas, altars, set up between October 27th and taken down shortly after All Souls Day. You can find many beautiful and elaborate pictures online if it is not celebrated in your area. At my parish, we have a lovely tradition of remembering our beloved dead with candles, many of us provide pictures to be placed by the candles, which will burn all month surrounding the altar. I love to reflect on the candles as all the souls that worship at the altar each Mass with us, Saints and saints, that join in our praise. I will add a photo of the candles this year, below, to the online version of this blog post.

There have been times during the year, or after the passing of someone dear, that I have experienced the thin veil between heaven and earth, the mist of time, more easily. Perhaps that is why I relish these days of All Hallows Eve, All Saints and All Souls so much. We can pause and reflect that it is literally a breath that binds us in our bodies and a more tangible realm. We take so many breaths each day for granted. If you have been with someone as they have breathed their last breath, you know how fragile and temporary life is.

This week, during my Wednesday Adoration time, Fr. Carlson played an organ piece, from the many he has downloaded and saved, that I hadn’t heard before. It was lovely, then dissonant like someone that might have hit the wrong note but it continued. It was jarring and unpleasant at times but then also hauntingly beautiful. I asked him about it afterwards but missed the name except that it was a Babylon meditation (if I get the full title this week, I will footnote it below). We reflected that it seemed a fitting reflection on the exile of Jews from Jerusalem to Babylonia. I later reflected on this symbolically for life. We are exiled, temporarily, from our true home, in Heaven. Life is full of those discordant moments, unsettling and disagreeable, in the middle of beautiful, soothing and joyful times. The next night I had a dream, full of symbolism about my life’s journey. I paused in the morning, journaled about it, not wanting to forget the details that I can reflect on and how they might be inspiration for areas of my life that need transformation. I viewed it as a thin, whispering insight between my conscious and subconscious being.

One of my favorite books, it is likely that I have written about it in the past, is Braving the Thin Places by Julianne Stanz. Early in the book she asks us to pause and take a deep breath, reminding us that “Our spirit did not generate itself; neither did we create it. It comes from a Divine Being who has breathed life into you and me, into all of us.” Stanz writes about her Irish heritage, Celtic wisdom and the beauty and symbolism of the “thin spaces and places” in Ireland. “Out of sight…does not mean out of soul.” The souls of those we love walk with us each day and remain close to us.

The Church asks us to pray for all those who have died, especially those who have no one to pray for them, this month of November. A lovely practice is to visit a cemetery and just pray the “Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord…” Often as I am driving between the tombstones of my grandparents and my parents I recite that prayer over all the tombstones at the cemetery. In the older section there may no longer be family members to pray for them. Whether you are close to the burial places of your loved ones or not, or others you have known in life, take some time during this month of November to remember them and pray in a special way for their souls. They have gone before us with the sign of faith, and have fallen asleep in the hope of the resurrection (Eucharistic Prayer in the Roman Canon). We shall join them some day.

“…do not let our brothers and sisters be parted from you, but by your glorious power give them light, joy and peace in heaven where you live and reign forever…Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon them. May they rest in peace. Amen” (Give Us This Day post for All Souls Day)

Wishing you abundant hope and peace, in the company of all the Saints, this month. Deena

Candles for our beloved dead at Holy Family Parish, Oglesby.

Featured

How you start your day

On By dpavinatoIn #sacredwork, a life of joy, A life worth living, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Daily Prayer, discernment, Doing what we love, Every day Catholic, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, mental wellbeing, mindfulness, nurturing growth, Our unique call, Pause and rest, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, surrender, Trust the journey2 Comments

Are your morning routines defined and predictable? Do you have things you do each morning that help you get ready for the day ahead? I have been reading lately that how you start your day, sets your day. I have a pretty reliable and set routine each morning but lately I have been questioning the effectiveness of each morning and also why I am not getting some of the reflection time in that I used to. I miss it and want to find a way to incorporate that quiet morning time back in my schedule.

I listened to Dr. Arthur Brooks, “the Happiness professor, best-selling author and Harvard professor, on YouTube a couple of weeks ago. He described his 6-step protocol each morning that he suggests will create a better day. He begins by getting up at 4:30 a.m. (Dr. Brooks cited a study that showed higher levels of productivity and creativity in those who began their day before dawn), after starting with an early bedtime the night before, exercising first thing (he has a gym in his home or when traveling only selects hotels with 24 hour gyms on premise), having time each morning to spend in spiritual reflection (he goes to daily Mass), delaying his morning coffee (saying that it improves focus and energy throughout the day) and has a high protein breakfast. Then he gets on with his day and makes sure his time is productive time by ignoring emails, the newspaper and social media until later, or checking hourly.

I enjoy listening to Dr. Brooks and his thoughts on happiness, reducing stress and anxiety, and spirituality. But I listened to these six points and felt like such an under-achiever! But to his credit, toward the end of the video, he said try it and adapt it to yourself, even inviting viewer response on how we might have changed it for our lifestyle.

Another routine I read was similar; plan the night before, get enough sleep, limit phone and technology use before bed, practice gratitude, hydrate in the morning, eat a healthy breakfast, move your body or exercise, and practice mindfulness or journaling.

Last week, in an online class, we talked about morning routines and setting daily intentions. Our discussion was about finding a routine that works for us and being aware, or conscious, as we completed all the tasks each morning that feel like an obligation or perhaps even prevent us from doing these things I have listed above. The main point was changing our attitude about those duties that feel as though they are hinder us from doing things we would prefer to do, in my case, my quiet reflection and journaling time.

I tend to get up at 4 or 4:30, feed the cats but don’t always stay up and begin the day at that time. That might be a good place to start, but that also means I have to do a better job of getting to bed early so that I am ready to stay awake at 4:30 a.m. I love watching the sunrise, so I am usually up by then, especially recently as the mornings are darker longer (well, at least until next week). Before daily Mass I do the social media posts for my parish, then get ready for Mass. When I get home the cats usually want more attention, or food if they ate at 4 a.m., and I want my coffee! I do a terrible time with a healthy protein-rich breakfast. At one point I thought about a protein smoothie first thing, but read one natural health practitioner say not to have anything cold first thing in the morning. I hate eggs and don’t eat meat, or very little, so that rules out lots of morning breakfast options. Maybe the better choice is still selecting the smoothie, even though it’s cold, because I would begin the day with protein and fruit.

I have been, over the past few months, working as a social media assistant for two different entrepreneurs, one an independent training and holistic practitioner and the other a retail establishment. I have noticed I get drawn into social media more than I did in prior months by checking out posts and techniques used, which then leads down a rabbit hole of viewing other posts and updates. I would like to discipline myself enough to come home from Mass, make the smoothie (or find a better alternative), make my coffee and sit down to journal before I begin my online work activities. A half hour or so isn’t going to make or break the day for daily sales at the store or online enrollments! Based on Dr. Brooks video, it might make me even more productive and focused.

If you are a pet parent, you also know that you have to be flexible for changes in routine. The cats love the patio as soon as I get home and I am happy to open the doors and windows to get fresh air in the house. The holistic practitioner I mentioned above, regarding the cold breakfast, suggested getting 10 minutes of sunshine early in the day, so it would be nice to step outside with the cats for a bit. That would add 10 more minutes to a routine before beginning work. But seriously, 10 minutes isn’t going to prevent me from getting things done and might even help, by standing outside, taking some deep breaths and reflecting on the day ahead before I sit down to journal.

The gym usually gets delayed until afternoon, if I get there, because I prefer to go when fewer people are there and I can’t imagine adding one more thing to the morning before doing my online work. But that works for me and I guess that is the point of this discussion. My recommendation is take in all the ideas and suggestions about creating a great day and then do what works for you. By all means be flexible and spontaneous too. This Sunday morning I was asked to “play the organ” (i.e., hit the buttons at the right time) on our amazing organ at church, that Fr. Carlson programmed with the music for Mass. I wasn’t in the mood to begin this blog on Saturday evening, my normal writing time is early Sunday morning, but I also wanted to help and relished the idea of attending Mass again this morning after attending Vigil Mass on Saturday. So I am posting it later than normal today. The world isn’t falling apart as a result. Often, on Wednesday mornings after Mass, the ladies invite me to join them for breakfast or a friend might reach out and suggest meeting for coffee. Being social and spending time with people I enjoy is also important to me and my well-being, even if it means other morning activities are delayed a bit. I think the most important thing is that we feel that we are choosing versus reacting to the activities in our day, having a positive attitude and making the most of the time we have been given.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on starting the day in a way that sets you up for a happier, more joyful, day. What routine has been most impactful for you? Do any of these ideas sound like ones you would like to incorporate?

As always, I wish you a week abundant in hope and peace, Deena

Blog image: Bela deciding that he needed to be a part of my morning routine a few years ago.

Featured

Grounded in faith

On By dpavinatoIn A life worth living, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Daily Prayer, discernment, Every day Catholic, grounded in faith, hope and healing, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, lifelong learning, mindfulness, nurturing growth, Our unique call, Pause and rest, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Trust the journey, visionary faith3 Comments

I started reading Brene Brown’s new book, Strong Ground: The Lessons of Daring Leadership, The Tenacity of Paradox, and The Wisdom of the Human Spirit, the past few days. I have to admit that it is always her personal reflections and application of her work with the Dare To Lead program that I find most thought provoking in my own life. We’re all leaders in some way; family, church or social organizations, the way we interact and care in relationships, but having stepped away from corporate work I am less interested in leadership qualities at that level. Still, I was intrigued with Brown’s new book and thoughts she might have on the current state of our societal relationships and leadership. I am glad I followed the hunch to purchase her book.

She began with a personal story about recovering from a pickleball injury and how her coach helped her find and work from her core, engage her body and mind in the healing process, and connect to her “strong ground.” She suggests that many of us are struggling to find our ground. She proposes that individually, and collectively in our country and in organizations, “we need to push into the source of our strength and sturdiness so we can navigate the world. We need the ground to steady us and at the same time to propel us into purposeful action.”

Brown writes quite a bit about her study of, and personal journey with, the mindfulness work of Jon Kabat-Zinn in relation to finding our center and being grounded. Citing research she did for another book, Brown says that both anxiety and calm are contagious. She reminds us that staying calm is an intention. When we consider those we encounter each day, “Do we want to infect people with more anxiety or heal ourselves and the people around us with calm?” We need to pay attention; to our breath, to what’s going on within as we speak and make decisions. I NEED to reflect on the attitude I have as I leave the house, am I going to contribute to the day that others are having or am I going to be a tornado of worry, concern and anxious thoughts as I venture out? Some days it just might be better to stay in until the calm returns and I feel grounded in the truth of who I am.

So far, my favorite sections of the book have been on transformation and “grounded confidence”. I tend to read the first couple of chapters of a new book, then browse and read selectively to get an idea of the entire book I am reading, then go back and read more slowly and thoughtfully. In writing about transformation, and summarizing her reflections throughout the book, Brown examines the false notion that learning and change are only about effort one applies. She suggests that real change happens when we focus and build our foundation, and operate from that place of being grounded, instead of reacting to a current situation or perhaps even worse, being so set in our ways that we think that the problem is with everyone else, thinking they are the ones that need to change, not us!

Personally, one place that I build my foundation and center myself is in my daily prayer, reflection and journaling. Daily Liturgy of the Hours, Lectio Divina, or scripture reflection remind me of God’s love and presence, no matter what seems to be going on around, or within, me. The Letter of 2 Timothy caution us that there will be people around us that deceive us and will go “from bad to worse”. But remaining faithful to what we have learned and believed, from Christ, we will remain “competent and equipped for every good work.” (2 Timothy: 3)

Remaining faithful to the daily practice of reflecting on the truth of our faith, we will be “strengthened with power through his Spirit in the inner self, and that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the holy ones what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, so that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.” (Ephesians 3: 16-19)

With that as the source of my strength, I am grounded, more capable and willing, to engage with the world with hope and joy.

Wishing you abundant hope and peace this week, Deena

Photo: Taken during a visit to Muir Woods, California

Featured

Whisper of the soul

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, A life worth living, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Daily Prayer, discernment, Doing what we love, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, mental wellbeing, nurturing growth, ora et labora, Our unique call, Personal call and vocation, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Saints as Models & Guides, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Trust the journey, visionary faithLeave a comment

A few weeks ago an opportunity to apply for a position that 10, maybe even 5, years ago would have been a dream come true, presented itself to me. At that point in my life I would have considered moving to be sure that I would be as available as the position would require. I applied but as I reflected upon it, and listened to the voice within, I just knew it wasn’t the right time or role for me as I wind down my 60’s this year. I emailed and withdrew my name. Once I made that decision, in God’s timing and providence, I was asked to be a social media coordinator for a second client. It’s with a business that is very appealing to me and my personal interests. They carry products that inspire me and my creativity. Both of my part time clients are in the business of things that I enjoy. I feel that I am contributing, but am also challenged to learn and grow.

Saturday was the Memorial of St. Pope John XXIII, the Pope who convened the Second Vatican Council, to bring a breath of fresh air to the church, which resulted in changes to the liturgy (such as praying in English instead of Latin for those of us in the US, and the altar facing forward) and church structure. He was a humble servant, a humanitarian, and was an advocate for human rights and for peace.

I read a quote on a social media page reflecting on his papacy, which I fell in love with, so I wanted to learn more about it. The quote: “Consult not your fears, but your hopes and dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern yourself not with what you have tried and failed in, but with what it is still possible for you to do.” Pope St. John XXIII

I found the quote in a Papal Artifacts site that documented St. John XXIII and his accomplishments. But Google indicated that the quote is not cited in any specific papal document but seems very much in style of his Daily 10 Point Plan. The Pope’s “Daily Decalogue” was shared in a memorial Mass in 2006 by Cardinal Tarcisio Bertone. It includes daily resolutions such as living with a positive attitude, reading and creating a daily plan, and believing that he was created to be happy, believing in the Providence of God in his life and to do good in life each and every day. So I think the quote is still a good one to share and that that it represents the spirit of how St. John XXIII approached life.

This week grab a notebook or piece of paper and write down your hopes and dreams. Create your own personal “daily decalogue”, ways you would like to approach each day. I have a series of things I do each day, but not always in the morning. I have been reflecting that I would prefer to challenge myself to get up earlier each morning (or if I wake up at 4:30, which happens a lot these days, stay up) and begin my prayer and journaling. It is with focused attention and reflection that we get clear about what is important to us and what we desire in life. I have always believed that the desires we hold in our heart are calling us to use the gifts that God has given us in life, as long as they bring us closer to God and serve others in a life-giving way.

This past week was also the memorial of St. John Henry Cardinal Newman. One of his prayers, which I learned during Lay Ministry training in our Diocese in the 1990’s, has remained a favorite over the years. It also speaks of our soul’s purpose. I’ve shared it before but would like to share here again. I hope as you read, and pray with this, you are reminded that there is something specific you are on this earth to do. Listen and then follow that desire.

God has created me to do Him some definite service. He has committed some work to me which He has not committed to another. I have my mission. I may never know it in this life, but I shall be told it in the next. I am a link in a chain, a bond of connection between persons. He has not created me for naught. I shall do good; I shall do His work. I shall be an angel of peace, a preacher of truth in my own place, while not intending it if I do but keep His commandments. Therefore, I will trust Him, whatever I am, I can never be thrown away. If I am in sickness, my sickness may serve Him, in perplexity, my perplexity may serve Him. If I am in sorrow, my sorrow may serve Him. He does nothing in vain. He knows what He is about. He may take away my friends. He may throw me among strangers. He may make me feel desolate, make my spirits sink, hide my future from me. Still, He knows what He is about. (St. John Henry Newman)

Wishing you abundant peace this week, Deena

Image: Some plants, and an adorable sign, in my raised bed.

Featured

A pilgrim journey

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Easter Hope, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, Lenten journey, sacred seeing, Seeing things in a new way, Spiritual Journey2 Comments

Our Lenten journey has brought us to the glorious Feast of Easter, it is the Solemnity of all Solemnities, a joyful conclusion to our Lenten penances and the beginning of the Octave of Easter (Easter is eight days long!). I wish you and your loved ones a grace-filled Easter Season!

If you participated in the Triduum Services of the Lord’s Supper, Good Friday and Easter Vigil, there is so much to reflect on from the solemn liturgies we prayed with and today we celebrate the gift of God’s love in the Resurrection. A few thoughts came to mind as I reflected on my own journey through Lent.

Meditations written by Pope Francis for the Good Friday Way of the Cross in Rome’s Colosseum explained that the world we are faced with can be cold and calculating, that we become prisoners of ourselves when we focus on selfishness and indifference to those in need. Writing about and using the analogy of each of the Stations, Pope Francis explains our human journey and that only when we focus on the way of Christ, are we able to make sense in our lives, to bring about a restoration of joy and we feel as though we have come home.

Pope Francis’ meditation reminds me of the essence of a book I read during Lent, Jesus and the Jubilee; The Biblical Roots of the Year of God’s Favor by Dr. John Bergsma. It’s a deep and profound study of the history of the Jubilee Year in the Church and an invitation to reflect on this current Jubilee Year of Hope 2025, as a way of life, not a single, special event in the Church. He shares practical ways that we can bring the Spirit of Jubilee into our lives. We reflect on how we might make Jubilee a lifestyle and encounter the liberty that Jubilee offers us. If I approach the crosses of daily life with a heart of the Beatitudes and the “divine economy” of God, then we are able to experience the liberating grace of Jubilee.

I spent time on Holy Saturday reflecting on words written by Fr. James Martin, S.J. for America magazine on waiting. Fr. Martin wrote that most of our life is spent waiting. Our days waiting aren’t always “the unbearable pain of a Good Friday. Nor are they suffused with the unbelievable joy of an Easter.” Most days, Fr. Martin proposes, are “in between”. We wait for changes in circumstances, health, job, and relationships. I know I often think, “when this happens” (whatever “this” is), then I’ll be happier or find more peace, that my life will change or be better. But, our waiting becomes bearable when we change our approach to the outcome we desire and when we choose to wait with hope.

As I look back on this Lent, I’m a little sad it has ended. I have benefited from the extra prayers and practices. I have grown and changed in ways I hoped to, but desire so much more. That, I suppose, is our Easter pilgrimage, a journey that continues beyond this Lent and each day of our lives.

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Image: A fresco of the women encountering the angel at the tomb of Jesus, painted by Fra Angelico viewed in the Museo di San Marco in Florence, Italy.

Featured

Walk slowly

On By dpavinatoIn a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, contemplation, Daily Prayer, discernment, Eucharistic Revival, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, Lenten journey, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Spiritual Journey, spiritualityLeave a comment

When I am focused on a task I tend to power through it. It might take me a bit to get motivated but then once I am ready to take it on, I can be quite determined. That is a great quality for house cleaning, organizing or cleaning up the garden but perhaps not the best attitude for the season of Lent and preparing for Easter.

This past week I was reflecting on quotes by Catherine of Siena, regarding the endless abyss of love that God has for each of us, which seemed fitting the week before Holy Week. As a commentary I was challenged to consider, to be moved by this love, and to allow any ways that I have been indifferent or unaware of the depth of that love to come into my awareness. I reviewed the practices that I have taken on during the Lenten season and realized that as we got deeper in the season I was powering through the readings and daily reflections like I would a class assignment. It became a task to complete, an activity to mark done, and an accomplishment versus my original desire to create more space for intimacy in my relationship with Christ. My journal is full of moments of introspection and grace for sure, but my pride and perfectionism were also evident to me as I pondered the weeks leading up to today, Palm Sunday, and our entrance into Holy Week.

As I reflect on Lent and my desire for that intimacy with Christ, I can honestly say it has been one of the best Lent’s ever, my desire for liberation and change of heart, deepening in a way that I prayed for. But I know that, reflecting on my approach, there is a capacity for deeper intimacy this week.

It’s not too late.

So this week, if you participate in Triduum services, or as you reflect personally on the somber days of Holy Thursday, Good Friday and the silence of Easter Saturday, walk slowly and contemplate what is happening within you as you prepare for Easter Sunday. Each Easter, during Mass, the congregation is asked to renew baptismal promises. In one of my Lenten reflection books I was invited to consider how well I have fulfilled those commitments this past year. Preparing for that renewal again this year, how might I resurrect the promises of new life within me? Where am I being invited to seek renewal in my life? I offer those reflections and invitations to you as well.

I wish you an abundance of grace this Holy Week, as we contemplate the greatest sacrifice of love. Deena

Image: The Palm Sunday cross at my parish, Holy Family Church.

Featured

It takes heart

On By dpavinatoIn A life worth living, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, discernment, Doing what we love, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, Lenten journey, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, Spiritual Journey, spiritualityLeave a comment

March is Women’s History Month and yesterday, Saturday March 8th, was International Women’s Day. It was inspiring and uplifting to see and read positive posts about women and the potential influence and impact women have on each other and the world. I thought about the number of women who have helped shape me to be the woman I am today. I think of the women, personally and in the broader social arena, who inspire, and challenge, me to be more. I reflected on being in a later season in life, what I fondly called a Crone or Wise Woman phase of life, and my ability (and desire) to cast a positive example for younger women in an earlier season of their lives.

There are so many lovely idioms about the heart, such as pouring your heart out, losing heart, or wearing your heart on your sleeve, that express how we feel when something is important to us or suggests a deeper emotion within us about a certain event or our reaction to it. In speaking of others, to say someone “has heart” suggests that we see qualities such as kindness, compassion, courage or a deep level of empathy for others.

Beth Knobbe is a woman I met while working for Ignatian Ministries and is someone I would describe as a woman who “has heart”. I had the great pleasure of editing and publishing the weekly blog for the ministry and Beth is one of the frequent contributors. After leaving the ministry I stopped reading the blogs, not for any particular reason except to feel as though I was moving on and focus on my own voice and written content. This past Monday when I received the weekly blog email, “Blessed Are You Who Are Poor”, and noticed Beth had written it, I had a strong desire to read it and “connect” with Beth, albeit in her written word only. Beth shares a beautiful encounter (links to the pages below) with a family in her church parking lot, her reflection on that family and being called, in her mission and work with others, to stand even more profoundly on the side of the poor in the world. Beth works for Catholic Relief Services and as a result of her reflection I feel called to make a change, a small one, to stand in support of Beth, the poor, and her work at Catholic Relief Services.

When I initially planned my upcoming Lent evening of Reflection, Make My Heart Like Your Heart, I had a draft plan of launching an additional site or platform, besides this Journeys blog page, of courses or other events. The past two weeks have been a time of deep prayer, discernment, reflection and journaling. I have realized that creating such a platform isn’t what I want to spend time and energy on. I won’t go into all the details today, but some of my motivation for having a suggested registration fee (not required!) for the Retreat was for the cost of Zoom, starting and maintaining a website to handle registrations and a platform on which classes could remain and be viewed again. Yes, I still need to have Zoom as a platform for us to gather, but that really is the only expense I have and will use for other things like prayer gatherings or future retreats. So, all that said, I still plan on offering the retreat on the evening of March 20 but 100% of the proceeds from the retreat from those who choose to donate (not required to attend) will be donated to Catholic Relief Services and an event she is hosting (also on March 20) for the 50th Anniversary of Catholic Relief Services Rice Bowl. I’m not going to set up an online registration, you can send me a message (on this blog or on social media) if you would like to attend so that I can send a Zoom link privately the day before the event and provide my mailing address if you wish to donate for the event.

You can read Beth’s blog on Ignatian Ministries Into the Deep blog page or a copy of the same article on Beth’s website. I would encourage you to follow both sites if you don’t already.

It takes heart to put yourself out there, to have the courage and confidence to share your thoughts, feelings and emotions with others. It also takes heart to listen to and follow the inner guidance that comes from prayer and time spent in reflection and meditation. It takes heart to be a voice for others, like Beth and so many other voices that I share with you in the course of this weekly format. Take time to go within and listen to the quiet tugs on your heart. Who needs to hear your voice? Can you be a voice for others?

If you want to spend time in reflection and sharing with others in a format of prayer and support, I hope you will join us for the Lent Evening of Reflection, Make My Heart Like Your Heart, on March 20th. It will be a simple format of listening to scripture, reflecting on it and then sharing with others. I will have a few thoughts to share on each of the three scriptures. If this sounds like a new practice for you, no worries, come to be with others and experience prayerful community.

Wishing you abundant peace this week, Deena

Blog image: From PicMonkey

Retreat image and information:

Reminder: A Lent Night of Reflection entitled “Make My Heart Like Your Heart: Encounter and Change of Heart” will be held on Thursday, March 20 from 6:30 – 8:30 p.m. Central Time. The suggested donation for the event is $19. As mentioned above, 100% of the proceeds will be donated to Catholic Relief Services. During the event we will reflect on the things in the world that consume our heart and attention, our need and desire to give and receive forgiveness, and ways that we can pour out our love to God in a personal and sincere way. I am excited to offer this and I hope you will be able to join me. 

Featured

Keep careful watch

On By dpavinatoIn A life worth living, a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, contemplation, Daily Prayer, discernment, Every day Catholic, Life in the Spirit, mindfulness, Preparing for Lent, sacred listening, Seeing things in a new way, Spiritual Journey, spirituality2 Comments

A week ago I saw a beautiful painting of Bishop Mariann Budde, shared by Fr. James Martin SJ, painted by Fr. William Hart McNichols. The post shared how Fr. McNichols came to know of Bishop Budde and then his reason for painting the image after the January Prayer Breakfast. It’s entitled “Holy Living Prophet Bishop Mariann” and it is lovely! If you follow Fr. Martin on social media you can see it there or visit Fr. McNichols’ website to view this painting and his other artwork. My reason for mentioning it was the first comment that appeared as I read the post by Fr. Martin. Besides spending much less time on social media since January, I have been staying away from the comment section on any post. But sometimes Facebook decides that I need to see it below the post. Even the most mundane posts seem to give someone an audience to be rude and disrespectful. The comment said “surely Fr. you recognize she is not a valid Bishop” and that she and her congregation are not in communion with the “true church”. Wow. I’ve been trying to give the gentleman the benefit of the doubt regarding his comment, viewing religion from the perspective of his (I assume) Roman Catholic affiliation. But it actually got me thinking about how we view things in life.

If I only knew seasons from a life lived in the Southeast or the West coast, I would never know the ever changing, mostly beautiful and somewhat fickle, seasons of the Midwest. If I grew up in a Latino household, I would have experienced delicious food made with spicy chili peppers, but perhaps would never have experienced the aroma of pasta with herbs, olive oil and freshly grated cheese. My experience wouldn’t be wrong, it would just be shaped by my familiarity with the seasons or food I have been exposed to. It should not diminish the experience someone else has had.

Stick with me on this. I am by no means saying because I am not aware of (or choose not to be aware of) a different opinion that makes my view acceptable. I am also not saying “if it feels right to you” then it’s ok. Choices and decisions are so much more complex than that. But I am saying that just because I see something from my world view, then it does not mean that everything and everybody else is wrong. Making an assumption like that might take research, discernment or guidance from someone who knows and understands the differences better than I do.

This past week, the first reading at daily Mass, or as you read them at home, was from the book of Sirach. This book of Wisdom advises us where to place our faith and hope, what things in life really matter and how we can trust in God, even during times of difficulty. The first reading for this weekend, Eighth Sunday in Ordinary Time, was also from Sirach, and will be on Monday and Tuesday until we enter the season of Lent. The reading from Sirach 27: 4-7 grabbed my attention and has not let go.

“When a sieve is shaken, the husks appear; so do one’s faults when one speaks. As the test of what the potter molds is in the furnace, so in tribulation is the test of the just. The fruit of a tree shows the care it has had; so too does one’s speech disclose the bent of one’s mind. Praise no one before he speaks, for it is then that people are tested.”

Besides feeling the political embarrassment of the behavior in the White House on Friday, I have had a couple of other occasions this week that allowed me to watch others in a personal and broader landscape. Cliches like these seem true; “only time will tell”, “time reveals a persons true colors” or as in the gospel for today, “every tree is known by its own fruit.” (Luke 6: 39-45). There’s no room for judgement, at least by me, but watching and waiting to see an outcome or behavior can be helpful. It takes patience and it takes a decision on how to act or respond as it unfolds.

As I prepare for Lent this week and consider what I will do, or in some cases “give up”, I turn to the Rule of St. Benedict again this year. There is so much wisdom in The Rule for me, as a Benedictine Oblate, as I look at the areas of my life that need refinement, molding and reformation. The chapters on The Tools for Good Works and Humility are my favorite each year. I could try to live each Lent with the goal of practicing “your way of acting should be different from the world’s way” or “keep careful watch over all you do” and be challenged enough during these next 40 days. Then there is always the call to make more time for “holy reading” and prayer, which has been easier now not watching the news or TV. But I can do more! Lastly, Benedict’s guidance on moderation in speech, esteem for silence and listening remind me that I desire to make sure that the speech I use and the conversations I engage in reflect the desires of my heart. Will I fail? Absolutely. But giving more attention to my internal and external dialogue might bring about the more lasting change after Lent that I desire.

I invite you, if you are considering participating in Lenten observances of fasting, prayer and almsgiving, to reflect on the words I shared above from Sirach. Pick up a Bible and read segments of the book to reflect on for Lent and see what the Spirit might be calling you to consider this Lent. You might also consider joining me for my Lenten Night of Reflection on March 20 at 6:30 p.m. CT. I will have more information in the next week but have repeated my previous update below.

Wishing you abundant peace and a grace-filled and holy Lent, Deena

Reminder: A Lent Night of Reflection entitled “Make My Heart Like Your Heart: Encounter and Change of Heart” will be held on Thursday, March 20 from 6:30 – 8:30 p.m. Central Time. The suggested donation for the event is $19. I continue to think about the best registration process for this first offering but it might be as simple as a PayPal or Venmo payment. During the event we will reflect on the things in the world that consume our heart and attention, our need and desire to give and receive forgiveness, and ways that we can pour out our love to God in a personal and sincere way. I am excited to offer this and I hope you will be able to join me. Thank you to those who have let me know you are interested! For now, you can email me, private message me if you are interested.

Blog image: A scenic window view in Santarem, Portugal

Retreat Image:

Featured

Simple Joy

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, A life worth living, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, contemplation, Daily Prayer, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, mindfulness, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, Spiritual Journey, spiritualityLeave a comment

On Friday as I was preparing to drive back home after a doctor appointment, I remembered that the Chicago Cubs Spring Training game was about to begin. I opened the sports app on my phone and clicked on the game. I was immediately treated to images of sunshine, short sleeves, people enjoying the day on the outfield grass areas and players warming up on the field. Then I heard the voices of the announcers, it was like hearing the voice of a friend that you haven’t talked to in a long time. As I drove home and listened to the game, I was filled with a lightness and feeling of normalcy that I haven’t felt in a long time. For a few hours, the world disappeared in the background.

Earlier in the week I opened an email from National Geographic with a stunning photo of a young student in India running down a steamy railroad track in the Ghum station of the Darjeeling Himalayan Railway. The writer/photographer (Sara Hylton) was writing of this experience in India. She has been living there, escaping life in the West after the death of her father. In that instant the figure caught her attention and she captured the photo of the young boy. She stated that her journey of grief, and daily activities in India, transformed her. She learned that “it’s that what comes next will bring its own magic. New colors, more light, waiting to be revealed.”

Fortunately, as of 5 a.m. this morning, Pope Francis was reported to have had a “peaceful ninth night” in the Gemelli Hospital in Rome. The news of his illness has been of a great concern to me, my friends and the world. Pope Francis is a pervasive voice of hope, love, peace and care for the world, especially those in need. We need his voice now more than ever. I worry for his health and well-being, but for the world if we lose this great shepherd.

The news with the disturbing images of chainsaws and gloating posts of migrants detained in chains with the comment “this will make you feel good” can send me over the edge. How can this possibly make anyone feel good? As mentioned last week, I have been staying away from the news. But even in an attempt to find and share something positive on social media, the glaring images overwhelm the page, resulting in less time spent there as well. As a result, life has become more quiet and peaceful each evening in my home. I enjoy the silence for reading and reflection. I even began a jigsaw puzzle! Although I can’t say that that has been a stress free experience! My friend, Cindy, assures me I will develop a process and rhythm to putting puzzles together. I will focus on that bit of encouragement.

So, where do we find relief? I suggest in the simple joys of watching the sunrise or sunset, with each sunset getting later and later each day. I dream of my plants that will begin to emerge with warmer days. My heartbeat calms watching the total bliss and carefree spirit of a sleeping cat. I look forward to meeting with a friend to discuss her plans for her trip to Italy (and potentially my own). I began reorganizing kitchen cabinets this week. I may not be able to control the chaos in the world but I can create order in the small details of my life and home. As St. Teresa of Avila is quoted as saying “The Lord walks among the pots and pans”.

In this book, The Joy of Discipleship, Pope Francis, says “Dear friends, be glad! Do not be afraid of being joyful! Don’t be afraid of joy….” Speaking of the joy that comes from closeness to God, from God’s presence in our lives, he encourages us not to be afraid of this joy and share it with others. I believe that joy comes to us in plain and uncomplicated ways if we are open to seeing it.

I invite you to consider the simple ways that you can find joy and peace each day. They may be things that you are doing every day. Linger in them just a moment longer. Notice and be present to them offering a word of gratitude for them. I am convinced that in doing so, we will see and experience moments such as these even more.

Wishing you abundant joy and peace, Deena

Reminder: A Lent Night of Reflection entitled “Make My Heart Like Your Heart: Encounter and Change of Heart” will be held on Thursday, March 20 from 6:30 – 8:30 p.m. Central Time. The suggested donation for the event is $19. I continue to think about the best registration process for this first offering but it might be as simple as a PayPal or Venmo payment. During the event we will reflect on the things in the world that consume our heart and attention, our need and desire to give and receive forgiveness, and ways that we can pour out our love to God in a personal and sincere way. I am excited to offer this and I hope you will be able to join me. Thank you to those who have let me know you are interested! For now, you can email me, private message me or add a comment to this post on my website adding “Retreat” to the beginning of your comment and I won’t approve (or will hide) that comment to be shown on the website.

Featured

A revolutionary vision

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, a season of hope, Art and new vision, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, contemplation, Daily Prayer, Jubilee Year of Hope, Sacred Heart of Jesus, Sacred Heart of Jesus, spiritual healing, sacred listening, sacred seeing, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Teachers and Guides on the journeyLeave a comment

Lately the range of emotions I experience each day feel as though I am riding a roller coaster. I might note, I am not a fan of roller coasters! I try to ignore the news and take deep breaths but it can be overwhelming. I stopped watching the news (preferring to read updates by well versed political historians and fact-finders) but still come across posts with quotes by our leaders, elected or not, that are filled with such hate, delusion and self supremacy that I feel like giving up completely. But I know it is not the time to give in or to be silent. I also know that the people and things of this world are not the things that really matter, they are not my ultimate purpose or goal. My stability and sanity come from trying to balance each day with things that bring some relief, some joy, some hope. Thankfully there are an abundance of uplifting and life-giving posts, essays, articles and events that help me counter the negativity and vitriol.

As my thoughts for writing this post jumbled around all week, I thought of sharing an experience I had a couple of weekends ago, attending a fireside poetry reading by Scottish poet Kenneth Steven, hosted by friend Pat Leyko Connelly, also a published poet. He read from his book, Atoms of Delight: Ten Pilgrimages in Nature. I won’t share more details of the event as my friend Judith Valente, does so eloquently this morning, in her blog, along with other thoughtful reflections on finding wonder during these turbulent times. But, a significant moment during the event came for me as Kenneth Steven read a story of one of the significant “atoms of delight” in his life, being the first to gather the freshly fallen chestnuts from a tree in the early dawn. I recalled one of my own “atoms”. I spent some of my grade school years living in a small town in the area of the Catskill Mountains in New York. In a wooded area behind our home there was a huge rock (likely only 5 feet but in my memory it was massive) and giant pine trees. We would venture in the freshly fallen snow, shake the tree branches on each other and play on and around the rock. It was my own personal energy portal. Nature was alive and filled me with joy and wonder, an “atom of delight”.

In a personal post on social media this weekend I shared an article entitled “A Spell Against Stagnation”, a reflection on the writings of John O’Donohue, another poet that lifts my heart and spirit, on a site called The Marginalian (link to website but you can find on Facebook). Founder Maria Popova shares articles with endless links and spirals of creativity and nourishment. Statements from Maria, like “Kneeling to look at a lichen is a devotional act”, remind me to stop and look for those moments of wonder. I appreciate the beauty and sensitivity of her artwork, bird divinations, from An Almanac of Birds: Divinations for Uncertain Days which you can find on her website or Facebook page (and soon available in a card deck as a pre-order on Amazon).

Another simple practice that I implement each day as part of morning and/or evening prayer is a gratitude or wonder list. In a blog or article by writer and retreat facilitator, Mary DeTurris Poust, I was intrigued by a different approach to my daily list. Mary shared that she numbers her three daily posts in an ongoing list, which was now in the thousands. I began mine at the time of the reading and as of this morning have reached 215. This list is part of my daily Examen (a practice of reflecting on the graces, consolations and desolations of each day) journal. It helps me look for those moments of wonder, those small “atoms of delight” in each day.

Today a homily written by Pope Francis, read by Cardinal Jose Tolentino de Mendoza, challenged artists [poets, writers, visual artists…] to be “witnesses of the revolutionary vision of the Beatitudes”. The Pope said that living the Beatitudes and expressing them in art [and I would add the expression of our lives] was a way to reveal “ truth and goodness …hidden within the folds of history”, and “giving voice to the voiceless”. “‘Artists have the task, the Pope said, of “helping humanity not to lose its way’”. (Vatican News, February 16, 2025)

If you seek solace these days I encourage you to read poetry, listen to music or reflect on art. Visit some of the writers or poets I mention today or find others that inspire you to look at life differently. If you write, continue to do so. If you draw, paint or create mixed media journals, keep going. If you have longed to pick up and learn to play a musical instrument, it’s not too late. Do it for you, not to change the world at large, but to change yours. Find joy and express it. It just might make each day a bit more lovely!

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Another note: I mentioned offering a Lent Night of Reflection a couple of weeks ago. I am still working on a webpage and more sophisticated registration process, but that all takes time. I decided to move forward anyway. The mini retreat will be “Make My Heart Like Your Heart: Encounter and Change of Heart” on Thursday, March 20 from 6:30 – 8:30 p.m. Central Time. The suggested donation for the event is $19. I will keep working on a registration process but it might be as simple as a PayPal or Venmo payment for my first event. During the event we will reflect on the things in the world that consume our heart and attention, our need and desire to give and receive forgiveness, and ways that we can pour out our love to God in a personal and sincere way. I am excited to offer this and I hope you will be able to join me. For now, you can email me, private message me or add a comment to this post on my website adding “Retreat” to the beginning of your comment and I won’t approve (or will hide) that comment to be shown on the website.

Photo: A print of Bernini’s “The Ecstacy of St. Teresa of Avila” that hangs in my office.