Featured

Big changes start small

I was taking a picture of the sunrise this morning and turned to notice that the leaves on the tree in the backyard were beginning to change. The days have been cooler, the morning and nights magnificent, so the changes into Fall are beginning to take place. The purple flowers on my Ruellia Brittoniana (Purple Showers) have been decreasing in number each day. But the mum is beginning to open and show its color. I leave the windows open longer in the morning and open them back up again for most of the evening. Pretty soon our Illinois Valley will be aglow with vibrant oranges, reds and yellow leaves.

I have been tackling a large project in the house, projects I have put off a long time. Earlier this week I couldn’t even breathe as I began to think of the enormity of the task. It would literally take my breath away, paralyzing me instead of motivating me into action. I told myself to begin with one small task. That moved to another. Pretty soon I felt like I was making progress. Cleaning and getting rid of items is a big enough challenge but when there are emotions tied to them, it can become oppressive.

This week we celebrated the Beatification of Blessed Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen in our Peoria Diocese. The pre-Mass talks were excellent and some quite moving for me. The Mass was amazing! Growing up watching Blessed Sheen on TV, and then more recently with talk of his beatification in our Diocese, and path to sainthood, I am very familiar with stories of Sheen’s life. I have visited and prayed at his tomb, since it came to St. Mary’s Cathedral, many times. The events leading up to this week certainly renewed an understanding of the faith life of this holy man. Fulton Sheen has often said that his knowledge and insight can be attributed to his prayer life. He prayed a Holy Hour, in front of the Blessed Sacrament, every day.

To see so many faithful people attending the events in Peoria and St. Louis has been spirit-reviving. But it has also been a bit overwhelming, just like my household project. I desire to live a more faithful, and prayer-filled, life than I already do. It feels like there is such a huge gap between what I desire and the way I live my faith life.

As I have been writing this, Stephanie at Lindy Stitches, the host of the virtual stitching retreat I am attending, read an essay she wrote, during our virtual coffee hour. She affirmed the topic of this blog for me! Talk about synchronicity! Here are a few tidbits. I hope she shares it in a PDF for us. If so, I will share.

“…Good things take time. Really big things like Douglas Firs take decades to grow… Lovely things take time, they don’t happen overnight, you can’t pay for them to hurry up. Slow things made with intention are valuable things… Cross Stitch is being productive in a way that is slow, but man, that way is slow! … I don’t have to be productive all the time, that’s not the way I want to live anyway… What’s the point of all the time saving devices, just to work more? … Real beauty requires a human mind, a human hand and a human’s precious time.”

AMEN to all of that.

Just as the season are changing slowly and we relish it, this post is a reminder to myself, to go slow and have faith that the changes are happening, albeit slower than I prefer. I hope this reminder speaks to you too.

Wishing you abundant peace this week, Deena

Today’s image – my tree in the backyard this morning.

Featured

It’s a delicate balance

Turning 70 can definitely have an impact on your perspective in life.

It has given me the opportunity to reflect and be grateful for the friendships I have and the ability to spend more time with and appreciating them. I have, for the most part, everything I need and have decided I want to simplify in many areas of life. I can also relax the longing to figure out “what I want to do with my life”.

It makes each day seem even more precious.

I have been impacted, as so many of you have, by the images from Nepal. People who were sitting on a bus at the border crossing, or walking in the streets of their village, swept away by the flash flooding. Fortunately, there are stories of survival but for so many the loss is inconceivable. Friday night we also learned, in our Illinois Valley area, of the tragic loss of a young boy in a car accident, with the mother and brother surviving. Again, lives changed in an instant.

Regardless of our age or situation, each day is a gift.

This morning I read an article by a needlework artist who shared some thoughts after attending a Vince Gill concert. She’s a big fan so is aware of the goals he has, such as 50 years into his career, taking on a project to create 12 extended play releases. One might ask Gill, why not relax and begin to take it easy? She wrote that when Gill was questioned about it, he replied that “he doesn’t have as many years left to be creative — so it matters to him more than ever.  And then he said he’s having the time of his life, just having a ball with it.” She used his story as an analogy, encouraging us to “learn a new stitch” or “start a new canvas” or “become the artist you’ve always wanted to be”.

I have always had the tendency to put off things – I can’t do this until … one more class, one more book, one more technique, etc “before I am ready”. My friend Kate taught a class this week, The One More Thing Trap, that encouraged us to look at all the “one more things” we tell ourselves that have to happen before we can be the person we want to be. When we do that we lose the ability to feel present and connected to where we are right now. Note: you can still access the replay to this free class by registering for Kate’s class here.

My cross stitch, and other art projects, have become a beautiful metaphor for living life. They have become a living reflection of my journey. Taking life more slowly and deliberately. Living and acting with intention. Trying bold new projects. Simply having fun. Each day is like a project, taking it one stitch at a time.

Regardless of your age, 30 or 80, my wish is that this week you enjoy the moments as they come along. Be present. Be adventuresome. Savor them.

Wishing you abundant joy, Deena

Today’s image: I noticed a dragonfly on my “purple showers” the other day. He was simply sitting on to the edge of the leaf. Moving with the wind as it swayed. I wondered if he was stuck. After several minutes, he flew away. He reminded me to land lightly, settle softly, and enjoy the moment.

Featured

Be open and keep learning

One of the things I am most enjoying about my new hobby and passion for cross stitch is that there is so much to learn. Groups I am in share tips and tricks for stitching on various fabrics or ideas and ways to mix colors for floss (thread) that you don’t have in your “stash” or to make a pattern your own style. I can’t think of a day in the past 11 months that I haven’t learned something from watching another stitcher.

One of my favorite designers, and floss tube creators, is Jacob de Graaf of Modern Folk Embroidery. He’s a multidisciplinary artist but an expert in traditional style, period reproduction, Quaker and Dutch/Frisian samplers. As we are journeying through a stitch-along for the month of August working on our Fast Frisian sampler, Jacob has been sharing his sampler collection and the research he has done to learn about the young girls that stitched the samplers, the schools or orphanages they attended, and the families and villages that they grew up in.

The past two weeks, in our daily stitching videos, he has taken us on a journey to various cities in the Netherlands to visit art museums, landmarks, and the quaint 600-year-old-city that he grew up in. It has an historic canal, a waterway that was a thoroughfare, that connected Friesland to Germany. Because of that, his town received their “city” status. Jacob took us to lakes, gardens and a lovely working windmill. I will probably never visit the Netherlands so I have been soaking up the sites and information he has shared with us.

In today’s image I have shared my progress on our sampler, as well as the desired end result showing Jacob’s chart and design. I am behind on my Frisian samplers as well as other “stitch-alongs”, due to a lot of birthday celebrating this week, for which I have no regrets and am grateful for the opportunity to celebrate with friends. Hopefully I will catch up this week. But as another floss-tuber said this week regarding her stitch-along, there are no stitching police, do what you can and have fun. Great advice for life as well.

Today, in his Angelus address for the Twenty-First Sunday in Ordinary Time, Pope Leo XIV reminded us to remain open and resist the temptation to think that we have learned all we need to about our faith. Pope Leo reflected on Matthew’s Gospel and Jesus’ question to the disciples, “But who do you say that I am?” Pope Leo suggested that Jesus calls us to give a personal response to this question, to continually rediscover our relationship with Jesus in the Gospels, reviewing and renewing the choices we make each day to be sure they are consistent with the faith we profess to believe.

If we attended Catholic schools, or religious education programs, we might be tempted to believe that we have learned everything we need to live a Christian life. I have found in the many books I read, or retreats I have attended, that my relationship with Christ is ever changing. My most common prayer during weekly Adoration is, “what do you want me to know or see today?” I am often surprised by the answers or insight I receive in prayer.

Pope Leo offered us these questions as suggestions to pray with: “Who is the Lord for me? Do I truly know him? What is his Gospel asking of me today? What steps and what choices am I called to make?”

Maybe there is a book you have seen that would offer some time for quiet reflection each day. Perhaps a retreat or Day of Reflection. Sometimes they are virtual, so you don’t actually have to take time to get away, although I do believe there is great benefit in removing ourselves from the daily distraction of being at home, with tasks to be done attempting to grab our attention. Our parish, as many do, will begin adult education programs for those interested in learning more about the Catholic faith, in preparation for receiving the Sacraments at Easter, but are open to those who want to rediscover and learn more about the practices of our faith. Check with your own parish, even if you have been away for a while, if that sounds interesting to you. Certainly you are welcome at Holy Family Parish if you don’t have a parish you call “home”.

This week think of an area of your life that you have grown complacent. How might you learn something new and gain some knowledge about it? Perhaps you are feeling called to grow deeper in your faith life.

I’d love to hear about it in the comments if you wish to share what that might be or what you learned.

Wishing you abundant peace and joy this week, Deena

Featured

Grateful anyway

I received Kate Bowler’s newsletter on August 12 titled “Why I’m Anti-Gratitude” and I have been on a gratitude practice recovery journey since. Now, first of all, if you have visited this blog before you know I am a fan of Kate Bowler. She’s a wonderful author, podcaster, speaker and professor at Duke University. I have her books and listen to her podcasts. So, this likely won’t change my overall opinion of Kate’s work. She began her newsletter sharing that she began a gratitude practice when she was recovering from a serious illness (Kate is a cancer survivor), and that it helped. But, she went on to say that the wellness industry has turned gratitude into a guaranteed cure for suffering and a “strategy for controlling life and our emotions. Another optimization project we can fail (or succeed!) at.” Simple, she suggests, write 3 blessings a day and you’ll never be sad again, concluding that it’s simply not true. She states that it has become a way to refuse that life is BOTH beautiful and hard.

Ok, I get that.

I paused. I questioned whether my daily practice was making a difference. I judged my current ongoing list of gratitude bullets (on that particular day my list was up to #1440) that I began after reading another author, Mary deTurris Poust’s practice of numbering and keeping the gratitude list going as a way to acknowledge the countless blessings in our lives. I wanted to go to Kate’s Substack account and comment that I don’t think most of us see gratitude simplistically, as a magic bullet for happiness. Instead I considered the study she quoted, that there wasn’t a positive benefit in those participants who journaled gratitude over those who did not. She teaches at Duke after all!

But it just didn’t settle with me. I couldn’t let it go. I believe being grateful does make a difference in our outlook and perspective in life.

Fortunately at the same time, one of the Facebook groups I am part of, facilitated by my Young Living Essential Oils manager organization and Brenda Schuler, our “Diamond” leader, began a 10-day Gratitude Reset Experience. Each day she has posted the benefits of practicing gratitude and rewiring our brains to focus on positive events and circumstances in our lives.

Our energy matches what we focus on. I believe this.

On July 12 Br. David Steindl-Rast turned 100 years old. He has long been a voice, known as the “Grandfather of Gratitude, for the transformative power of gratitude. His TED talk in 2013 tells us that it isn’t that happy people are grateful but rather grateful people that are happier. His 2017 YouTube video, A Grateful Day, has been one of my favorite reminders of the gift of each day. As founder of Grateful Living, Br. David and his organization, are committed to sharing the benefits, and practice, of gratefulness and the impact it can have on our lives and our world.

Dr. Arthur Brooks, a well-known author and podcaster, recently shared his 5 step process toward living a more grateful life. Also a professor (Vanderbilt University), Dr. Brooks says we are living in a “happiness crisis”. He writes and speaks extensively about finding happiness and meaning in today’s world by incorporating simple practices and attitudes into our daily way of thinking and being.

There are countless others. As I reminded myself of these respected teachers and scholars, I reflected that they aren’t suggesting we ignore the hardships in life. They aren’t saying do “this…” and your life will turn around and all difficulties will disappear. But I do believe they are suggesting that we are able to cope with and move through those times much easier when we have a foundation of gratitude for the blessings in our lives.

My faith does this as well. God doesn’t promise a life that is free from any worry or concern. However, I believe that I will be sustained during them. I was reassured as we prayed today’s Collect for the Twentieth Sunday in Ordinary Time: “O God, who have prepared for those who love you good things which no eye can see, fill our hearts, we pray, with the warmth of your love, so that, loving you in all things and above all things, we may attain your promises, which surpass every human desire.”

Today’s image is a picture of little Bela on the day he found me. While the pain of losing him this past February remains intense, I am grateful for the years we had together and all the joy and laughter he brought into my life.

Difficult and challenging moments will show up, that’s a given.

Be grateful anyway. Peace, Deena

Featured

Crowding out the chaos

My brother and I own the duplex that I live in. We have a tenant renting the other side. I have several plants in the flower beds on that side of the building but I have not planted as many as I have on my side and I don’t take the time to care for it as well as mine. For the past couple of years the weeds have been atrocious. I have tried rock, heavy mulch (lots and lots of heavy mulch!), landscape paper, but the soil is just lousy. The weeds seem to thrive in it. I have been putting off getting over on that side to clear the weeds again. Friday I decided I needed to get out there again, but I had a new idea. I purchased some ground cover, as I have in many areas of my flower beds, and planted to see if it will eventually grow and crowd out the weeds. I only completed a small section and I really wanted different ground cover than the ones I found, but it’s a start!

Planting the new ground cover is fresh on my mind this morning as I reflected on the Gospel reading for the Nineteenth Sunday in Ordinary Time. Matthew’s second accounting of the storm at sea has the apostles in the boat, alone without Jesus, as a storm brews and overwhelms them. In this version, they see Jesus in the distance as he walks toward them on the water. We are all familiar with Peter calling out to Jesus, Peter walking out to him on the water, but then begins to sink as he takes his eyes off Jesus. Our pastor, Fr. Paul Carlson, shared an insightful homily of the two storm versions in Matthew’s gospel and the need to keep our focus on Jesus as we navigate the storms and turbulent waters of this world. He reminded us that as followers of Jesus, “we need to be able to walk on the difficult seas [in life], but not be swallowed up by them.”

It’s not easy some days. The noise and turbulence of the world can overwhelm us just as the sea did to the apostles in the gospel. The weeds can take over and crowd out the good plants, in our spirit and soul, unless we replace the weeds with better plants. We need to blanket the soil of our minds and hearts with quiet time of prayer, reflection, and soul time with God. We are able to keep our eyes on Jesus, and less on the world, by who and what we devote our attention to.

I’m not sure if it’s age, or wisdom, but I find myself cherishing the quiet, alone time at home, or at church, more than I ever have in past years. Whether reading, listening to podcasts, gardening, stitching and reflecting, or simply in quiet prayer, it’s easier to be at peace. Perhaps it isn’t what I am turning toward but what I am turning away from. Likely, it’s a combination of both. Regardless, life is more serene and tranquil when I do so.

At this point in my writing journey of publishing this blog every Sunday for over three years, I have to check titles to make sure I haven’t used it before. This by itself is a task in creativity. I searched and found a previous post titled, “Clearing the Weeds”. I reread it and was reminded of a somatic technique called SNAP that author, and mindfulness teacher, Julie Potiker, developed. In the blog I share the meaning of the acronym, and briefly how to use the technique, to manage difficult emotions and move through situations with more ease and peace. I had forgotten about it, and in addition to prayer and contemplation, this simple technique is a great way to recenter in moments of stress. You can click here to read that post:https://deenapavinato.com/2025/06/22/clearing-the-weeds/.

This week I encourage you to find ways, that are helpful to you, when you need to clear the weeds in your own inner landscape. Find ways to be still. Then check in and see if it makes a difference in your day and your outlook.

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Today’s image: One of the small areas of pachysandra, a ground cover (Japanese Spurge), in my flower beds, that my friend Kathy and I fell in love with at Anderson Japanese Gardens in Rockford and have been adding to our flower beds this year. It’s growing nicely and next year I will be sure to add more to both sides of the duplex.

Featured

Calming the mind

Last weekend was the most delicious pause to stitch and learn from designers, and those with a presence, in the stitching world. It was filled with lots of laughs and mutual support, which I am finding to be the hallmark of the stitching community. Last September I saw a Halloween chart and decided I was going to learn to cross stitch. I had never purchased a piece of fabric or floss for stitching. I have become obsessed with my new hobby. I love learning tips and tricks, of course. But more than anything else I love hearing the journeys of stitchers and creators that I follow. The husband and wife team of Artsy Housewife, Gigi the designer, delight me with their stitching and stories. Stephanie, a competent designer and owner of Lindy Stitches (an online store for all things stitching), shared a self-deprecating video of her 10 biggest design flops this week, not to solicit support or sales, but to share her thoughts for those who might be trying their hand at designing charts. As usual, she had me laughing! I am constantly amazed at the wisdom of Jacob de Graaf, a designer from the Netherlands, who is an expert on antique samplers. His own designs are influenced by Quaker samplers and designs from the Netherlands and Scandinavia. I have selected two (what am I thinking?!) designs for my August birthday stitch and as part of a stitch along he will be leading. The list of designers, makers, and regular stitchers like me, who share their insights, journeys and projects, that I watch and learn from is endless.

But, the best part of stitching is the quiet, steady, peaceful flow state I enter each and every night as I work on projects. Other concerns, or mindless chatter, fall into the background. Each stitch becomes a tiny win for the day. They are little victories that release feel good hormones like dopamine. Knitting and crocheting do the same for those engaging in those crafts, also said to support emotional regulation and good brain chemistry. As our brains lock into the single task at hand, the brain gets focused and feels safe. I am changing and growing with each project I stitch, not only in confidence but also a sense of who I am as a person. I began learning about the neurological reactions of crafting, journaling and drawing, and the impact on our overall well-being, when I began experimenting with and studying neurographic art last year. By focusing on the process of drawing simple lines and curves, we calm down and relieve stress. This alone can help us find solutions to issues we might be dealing with.

My prayer and contemplative practice has slowed down and become more centered as well. It has become easier to quiet the mind when it is racing. I can pray as I stitch – each stitch, each breath, clear a space to listen more attentively.

Another practice I was introduced to this summer was helpful as well. As I have shared, and written, I am a Benedictine Oblate. Generally each day, besides praying the psalms, I try to read The Rule of St. Benedict, which guides our daily living in the principles of stability, mindful work, and hospitality to others (welcoming the Christ in all persons). The Rule is broken down into small nuggets, or chapters, for each day of the year. There are many excellent commentaries on The Rule, which studying as an Oblate, help us find relevance for living in the modern world.

I was gifted a version of The Rule, “Suscipe me, Domine” compiled by a men’s monastic community in Norcia, Italy. I read one of the reflections on “Unceasing Prayer in the Rule of St. Benedict” that has significantly transformed my prayer life. Many of us are familiar with the “Jesus Prayer” prayed by the Desert Fathers and early Christian monks as a way to practice continuous prayer. It is certainly a version that I could have chosen. The reflection stated that St. John Cassian, who had a significant impact on St. Benedict’s writing of The Rule, advocates one prayer, “an all-purpose invocation” that can and should be prayed by monastics at all times, as transition from personal prayer to communal prayer, for those in an abbey or monastery. Cassian’s recommended verse was “O God, come to my assistance. Lord, make haste to help me.” This is a typical verse recited, or chanted, as the opening line for specific “hours” of prayer, such as Morning and Evening Prayer, in the Liturgy of the Hours. I began using this verse at various times of the day – when I sat down to pray but didn’t want to pray standard prayers or intercessory prayers, when my mind was racing with a concern that I wanted to quiet, during weekly Adoration in front of the Blessed Sacrament, and at 3 or 4 a.m. when I wake and sense that my mind wants to begin to spin out of control. Breathing slowly and repeating this simple prayer has been powerful! I would encourage anyone with “monkey mind” to give it a try. I’d love to hear your experience after practicing it awhile.

Lastly, finding ways to slow down and tune into our breath can be an amazingly simple practice to bring calm into your day. Whether stitching, praying a simple mantra, or sitting quietly in a chair paying attention to the breath, I am confident you will introduce more moments of peace into your day.

If you would like to learn more about breath practice, my friend Kate Brown, and her teacher, Valerie Sorrentino, will be offering a free live Zoom experience this week, Room To Breath, on Thursday, July 30th at 6 p.m. CT. You do not have to have previous breath work experience to participate. You will learn more about intentional breathing and two simple practices from Valerie’s program. I hope you will join me there! I will provide the link below (for those on social media, you may have to click the link to my website to access it).

I wish you a week that is steady, calm and full of peaceful moments, Deena

Click here for link to Room To Breathe

Today’s image: One of my 9-month patriotic stitch alongs, Remember the Ladies as part of America the Beautiful, by designer, Teresa Kogut.

Featured

Embracing the questions

A couple of years ago while pondering the persistent question, “what am I going to do with my life”, I finally realized I should stop asking and start living. I laughed and told myself, approaching 70 years of age (not nearly as close to it as I am today), it was time to stop trying to figure that out! Maybe there isn’t an “it” to actually discern in life. Over time, and considerable contemplation, the question morphed into “what am I being called to do, right now – this year or this day?” It’s a minor shift in wording but a huge shift in perspective.

It has felt like a shift to embracing the questions, rather than struggling with them. A fiber artist that I follow shared some thoughts on her own questions and reminded me of a quote by poet, Rainer Marie Rilke, “Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms and like books that are written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given to you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now.”

Deanne concluded her own pondering by saying that she thinks we are all “wonderers”, and that she had yet to meet someone who doesn’t ask questions of life. She said, “And we are all a wonder. And that is what life itself is. It is a wonder too. And so now nearly each day I remind myself to ‘Let the mystery be’ and to ‘Love the questions'”.

I couldn’t agree more!

In a movie, “The Gardener”, that I watched this week, the protagonist facing illness and her mortality, begins to open to beauty around her and to seeing life with new eyes. She is mesmerized by a snake that has shed its skin. She gazes on an agave type plant that only blooms once then dies. She mentions to a mysterious teacher that shows up on her journey, that she feels that death looms around her, she questions when the mortal fear stops. He responds, when you are ready for it to.

It’s easy to get caught up in the struggle and miss the mystery unfolding around us each day. If we are ready to release the grip and tight hold on the questions, then perhaps we are able to see things with curiosity instead. We can find wonder and awe in life unfolding around and for us. As I shared some thoughts on the book, The Practice of the Presence of God by Brother Lawrence, last week, it seems more fitting to be present to what we are called to in each moment. That is what brings peace and contentment in life.

The image I selected for today’s post is a tile of the shell marker pilgrims see on the various Camino paths on “the way” toward Santiago de Compostela. The shell serves as a directional guide letting pilgrims know they are on the right path. For medieval pilgrims, a shell would be a purposeful tool, to drink or eat from. For those of us who follow a Christian path, a shell vessel is often used during the sacrament of baptism, to pour water on the infant or individual being baptized. It is a sign of rebirth and divine protection. I purchased this tile, as well as a sterling shell to wear on a necklace while visiting Santiago de Compostela. They both serve as good reminders to watch for “markers” and continue on “the way” each day.

Wishing you abundant peace, wonder, and awe this week. Deena

Note re the movie The Gardener: before you search for the movie directed by Dabney Day, it was a special online release this week. It was a little bit Devil Wears Prada in the beginning, Hallmark throughout but a few lovely spiritual reflections throughout.

Featured

Wistful summer memories

Last night I noticed the first firefly (we called them lightening bugs growing up) of the season. I paused and watched, there was another, and another. I moved to a different window, opened it wide and watched them as they moved around the back yard, around the tree and plants in my flower beds. Soon, my cat, Butters, jumped in the screened window and watched them too. His head darted back and forth as each one lit in the landscape below.

I watched in delight. I inhaled the balmy summer evening air with birds still chirping, but more quietly than earlier in the day. The evening was calm, fewer cars and noise than usual. It was a picture perfect summer night.

I began to reflect on summer evenings of my youth. Nights on the front porch, growing up in a neighborhood where it was common to sit outside and visit. On occasion, after our baths, and dressed in pajamas, we would go for a ride to The Root Beer Stand for an ice cream treat, bugs buzzing under the canopy lights, as a car hop would bring a tray to the car window.

We vacationed in Wisconsin many summers while I was growing up. I can recall only a handful of memories from those summers. I remember the deer we fed by hand. Or the firetruck my father insisted my brothers and I got on so he could take a picture. I exclaimed the leather seat was too hot but he wanted a picture. I still have the photo, legs tucked up near my chin and dress pulled down over my knees. Funny how the picture takes me right back to the feelings I was having.

I attended a local summer camp, Camp Saint Claret (I think we called it Camp Claretknoll). It was a historic summer camp operated by the Claretian Missionaries on the Claretknoll property. The camp was literally a few miles from home but I felt as though we were transported to a different world. I had no idea at the time it was a missionary founded organization. I really can’t recall what we actually did there but thinking of it brings back to memory nights of campfires and scary stories.

I remember my Noni’s garden. Besides her vegetable plants, the garden border was always full of peonies and roses. She loved her garden and I know she planted those seeds in me as well. We would pick dandelion from the yard, so that she could eat the greens in salad, long before the days of chemical treatments on lawns. She taught me about picking and sautéing zucchini flowers.

I love my flowers and adding new varieties to the flower beds each year. But, I gave up gardening vegetables. After my mother died, I lost the joy. I carried on the tradition of planting vegetables, after my father died, which he took on with gusto after my grandmother passed away. Mom and I planted tomatoes, peppers, zucchini and cucumbers. Dad’s garden was always much bigger, priding himself in the lettuce, onions, garlic and sweet corn. Thinking of the garden also evokes lovely memories with my mother, grating zucchini for bread and cooking tomatoes for sauce to use all winter. Perhaps the spark will return one day.

Do you have a favorite summer memory? Or perhaps a summer tradition you grew up with and still share with your family today? I would love to hear it. You can reply in the Facebook or Instagram post, or on my website, so others can enjoy reading it.

Wishing you summer days to savor and that bring you peace. Deena

Image: With my “Noni” in her garden.

Featured

Becoming who I am

Earlier this week I listened to a vlog “The Elegant Haiku” and read the accompanying blog by Michael Kroth. In his video he said something that immediately caught my attention. I stopped the video, backed it up and played it again. I wrote it down in my journal and it’s been on my mind ever since.

Michael said: “What we practice becomes who we are.”

His feature article this week was regarding his journey, learning about and writing haiku, as a daily practice. He began in 2019 as a result of attending a workshop by poet, author, and friend of ours Judith Valente (you have seen her name here in this blog many times). It may have been about the same time that I attended a retreat given by Judith at the Monastery and was also introduced to haiku. Michael decided to make it a practice. I have tried multiple times but give up. I judge, criticize, and analyze. (Frankly it surprises me that I continue to write this blog each week.) Michael’s haiku poetry is very good. He and friends even published a book, Framing the Moment; Haiku Conversations, together after sharing their haiku with each other.

Haiku is a form of Japanese poetry, consisting of three lines, in a format of 5-7-5 syllables. I have seen multiple variations or adaptations but most use this format. It sounds simple but I would invite you to look outside, or at an image, and capture the essence of it, or how it makes you feel, using that format. It challenges us to find just the right words to express a feeling or insight. It calls us to slow down, choose carefully and purposefully. It is way to be present and mindful.

In one of Judith’s latest books, How to be a Contemplative (also mentioned by Michael in his blog), she shares her wisdom about slowing down in our hectic, often distracted, lives. If you are challenged to wind down at all, much less write a three-line haiku, I invite you to explore Judith’s book.

In addition to incorporating a practice, or desire to learn something, in our lives so that it becomes more closely aligned with who we are, I believe it also creates some sort of magnetic attraction to bring more of the same to us. Since reading Michael’s post I have seen and read so many compatible posts, poems, and book titles that encourage me to pursue and stay focused on the things that point me in the direction of who I am becoming and what I desire to have more of in my life.

I have a long list of things that I would love to be better at, that feel like they express who I am or who I want to be. So, I must ask myself why I am not pursuing them more enthusiastically – fear of failure, fear that I can’t ever be those things as proficiently as I want to be, that I will be judged…? If there is one gift of rapidly approaching 70 years of age, I have noticed that I am more easily gravitating toward not caring what other people think. But, there are moments. When I sense that feeling of doing something for approval, versus authentic desire, I think I have to grab myself by the shoulders and say “move on, let it go.”

Michael might be surprised to know that I have saved a little stack of his delightful pieces of mail, that he calls Haiku Drops (today’s image of the envelopes, not his poetry), since “meeting him” at a workshop with Judith. I pull them out from time to time if I need to take a peaceful pause during the day. Other times they just make me smile when I open the drawer I have them in, and see them. My point of sharing that is that our desire to learn and share something with others might be just what they need on any given day. So, if it makes you happy, continue to pursue and practice it, and share it with others!

Wishing you endless moments of being really happy with who you are, and who you are becoming, this week! Deena

Featured

A seed is just a seed

This is my favorite time of year in the Illinois Valley. We had late cold and rain this Spring, so it may appear to be a bit behind the last couple of years, but the baby corn, like the field in today’s blog image, are starting to sprout. I just love these little green leaves emerging from the ground. They make my heart happy!

Inside each tiny seed, the embryo of the plant has everything it needs to grow and transform into a mature plant. But each seed remains dormant until it has the right conditions of sun, oxygen, the right temperature and warmth, and moisture to activate and cause the seed to germinate. The seeds have a life force within them, that is dormant, until the right conditions appear to cause growth. (Farmers and scientists, please forgive my overly simplistic explanation.)

Seeing these plants beginning to grow this past week, I reflected again on the spirit, or life force, within all things. This life force is “viriditas”, or “greening power”, coined by St. Hildegard of Bingen, that I mentioned in last week’s blog. My reflection and study led me to review several articles again, especially one by Nameeta Renu, theology scholar and author of numerous articles on consecrated life, “Why St. Hildegards’s spirituality of ‘viriditas’ is so extraordinary”, on a site I follow, Global Sisters Report (see note below on GSR).

Hildegard, Benedictine abbess, mystic, healer, artist and scholar, saw the living power of light, from God, in all of creation. Her art and writings reflected this “greenness” in all things. But Hildegard’s concept of greening power wasn’t a study of ecology. She wrote that the soul within each person is the green life-force of the flesh. If we, as human beings, neglect our “inner greening”, if we lose the “sap of life”, carelessness about the things that are important in life, or if we experience the “drought of our indolence,” our soul power begins to “fade and dry up”.

Today is Holy Trinity Sunday. We reflect on the dynamic Love between Father, Son and Holy Spirit. We attempt to grasp how that Love is then shared with us. Hildegard would talk about the Holy Spirit as this green “sap” within us. Like trees, the Holy Spirit is the juicy green, moist, creative life within us. Is it alive or dried up?

So a seed is just a seed, or is it? It is pure potential. It is potential waiting for the right conditions to nurture it so that it can develop in a way that it becomes what it was made to be, in the image and likeness of the plant that created the seed in the first place. Or as Hildegard wrote, “Every creature is a glittering, glistening mirror of Divinity”. We were created in the Divine image of God. We are beloved sons and daughters.

So I pause to ask myself this week if I am nurturing and watering that seed within? Am I living to my potential, daring to declare who I am (also a thought from Hildegard)? What else does my spirit need to become fully alive, lush and green? I hope my thoughts prompt you to consider the same.

Wishing you a week, and a new month, that is thriving, vibrant and full of growth! Deena

Note: Global Sisters Report is an independent, nonprofit source of news and information about Catholic sisters and the critical issues facing the people they serve. They send daily email updates or you can visit their site, Global Sisters Report. You can also find a direct link on National Catholic Reporter.