Category: sacred waiting

Delighting in the simple things

On By dpavinatoIn Daily Prayer, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Spiritual Journey1 Comment

We’re beginning the Third Week in Ordinary Time this week. Merriam-Webster defines ordinary as a common quality, rank or ability; of a kind to be expected in the normal order of events. So, ordinary is not anything that we get excited about. Ordinary implies nothing monumental or note-worthy. But I began to view “ordinary” differently this weekend. I reflected that we can miss out on the wonder of the ordinary moments and I contemplated delighting in the simple things of life, simple moments that transform a day.

We’re studying the topic of Peace and Justice this year as our study for the Oblate program of St. Mary Monastery. We are reading several articles and the book, The Beatitudes of Peace by John Dear.

This week was a hectic week at Ignatian Ministries. I’m not sure it was entirely due to the Martin Luther King holiday on Monday, but rather the amount of work we wanted to accomplish in the week, regardless of the number of days. There were the normal daily tasks of email communication and preparations for a new class that Becky Eldredge, our founder, begins on Wednesday. Becky had preparations for other meetings and a retreat this weekend. I prepared the weekly blog post that emails tomorrow morning. Our team worked to provide data for a quarterly review, that I prepared the PowerPoint for and presented on Friday, as well as launching our Lent Path of Prayer Series for individuals and small group leaders by end of day on Friday. The quarterly review and Lent series were essentially my tasks as part of my role as Director of Programming, a part-time position, while still coordinating some of Operations reporting, so I was feeling the weight of getting those tasks accomplished by the end of the week. On Thursday and Friday, I found myself sitting at my desk, shoulders hunched, not giving myself the periodic breaks that a body needs, stretching or exercising, or drinking the water I committed to drink as part of the 14 Day Reset program I am doing. I know better, I told myself, but choose to ignore the thought.

So by 7 p.m. on Friday I was ready to settle in and read my assignment for Saturday’s Oblate Meeting. The author, in the chapter, Blessed are the meek, wrote of simple ways that we can become more nonviolent individuals, and in doing so, protect the earth and her creatures. First, we need to examine and adopt more gentle, kind and steadfast nonviolent behavior as part of our daily practice, to become more conscious in our daily living. He also, as a second point, invited us to spend more time in daily meditation with God so that we can become aware of the times our thoughts are not so gentle, peaceful or meek. We can “disarm” our hearts and begin to live more at peace with ourselves and each other. There were certainly moments during the week I could have benefited from that quiet meditation!

Then his third point was the one that brought me to the greatest self-awareness and desire to resume a more quiet and gentle perspective to my daily routine. John Dear stated that “in this ever-deepening spirit of gentleness and nonviolence, we delight in the simple things of life – the morning sunrise, the gentle breeze, the ocean waves, the night stars, the moon, the meow of a cat, the beauty of a caterpillar, the flight of a hummingbird, the howl of the coyote, the rain, the snow, and everyone we meet – the whole web of life.” Inside I cried “Yes! Yes! Yes!” I paused as I read and thought of the brief moment I pause each morning to look at the brightening pink and purple sky of winter, the birds that perch on the back fence waiting for the seed I have been giving them in the backyard instead of trudging through the deep snow on the side of the house to the bird feeders, the stretch of Butters and Bela, my cats, when I peek in at them and gently disturb their napping. Lately, the beauty of the falling snow. Those noticings take but a brief pause in the day. I certainly can afford a brief pause every hour of the day and wonder how they might, as John suggests, disarm the less peaceful thoughts that swirl around when I become restless and agitated over activities I allow to take priority over a calm spirit.

Just as I was writing this, Butters waited patiently by the sliding door for me to open it so that he could stick his nose outside or even take a few brave steps onto the patio. He doesn’t last long with the below zero temps we have had but he loves to venture out for a few minutes. I leave the door open so he can come right back in and then enjoy the air from the warmth of the little rug in the sunshine, when it is shining. As I let him out, preparing him for the chilly air, I paused to enjoy the long icicles hanging from the building next door and the patches of bright blue sky behind the cloud-covered sky. Yes, I thought, do more of this!

As you go through this new week, I invite you to pause a second longer when something of beauty grabs your attention, savor it, breathe it in. Rest a moment there. Be more attentive to the wonders of nature, even if it’s only in your backyard. Become aware of those creatures that play a “necessary role in God’s great design” and as we slow down, we will become more peaceful individuals, and in doing so, we will also be individuals more aware of our planet and our role protecting it.

Peace, Deena

Picture: from my photo album of an amaryllis that was blooming in December.

Alert and listening

On By dpavinatoIn Benedictine Oblate, Doing what we love, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Spiritual Journey, Teachers and Guides on the journey2 Comments

I have to admit there have been times that I was listening to someone and not hearing what they said. Have you ever listened to a speech, a lecture, a homily, or even a conversation with a friend, and realized you missed what was being communicated? We may be tired, distracted or preoccupied but we can’t really hear what the other person is saying unless we are awake, attentive and active in our listening. I would add that we have to be open to what is being said as well. If I have already decided that there is nothing to be gained from the person speaking, I certainly won’t hear anything.

Yesterday I attended the first session, for me and for the year, of a monthly creative expression workshop offered by visual artist, Lisa Sonora. I have been feeling that I haven’t been expressing my creativity enough lately, so I was instantly attracted to an email Lisa sent earlier this month. Yes, I write this blog and create written content for work, but visual art expression with photos, stamps, ink, paint and my journals has been on a sabbatical for months. I love the tag line on Lisa’s site for her workshops – “Make Art. Feel Better.” I know when I am creating with color and different medium, something comes alive in me. Of course I have to put judgement and comparison aside, that isn’t the point of creative expression. It is letting that inner voice that desires to speak do so. I saw a post this week that I shared to my crafting page on Facebook and loved the sentiment by a crafts and yarn supplier, Mary Maxim, “Crafting may not solve all my problems, but it solves enough of them.” I could not agree more!

In the workshop session we didn’t actually create anything, we listened and then journaled. Lisa asked us questions and we began the “dreaming and scheming” of those voices and desires we keep quiet. I can’t say I was shocked or surprised by my answers to the questions Lisa asked. But I definitely heard from the creative voice within that is longing to express herself. So, I am going to make a point this year to listen to that voice and provide the nurturing and support to let that voice have a place in my life.

The first reading for the Second Sunday of Ordinary Time is one of my favorites, from the first Book of Samuel (1 Samuel 3:3b-10,19). The young Samuel is sleeping in the temple and hears a voice call him. He assumes it is his mentor and teacher, Eli and goes to him and asks what he needs. This happens a couple of times before Eli realizes that Samuel is not attentive to the voice of the Lord and guides him to respond to the Lord the next time he hears the voice. Eli tells Samuel to respond “Speak Lord, your servant is listening.” There are a couple of key points in the scripture that relate to what I am trying to say in this blog this week. Samuel is not alert or aware of the Voice speaking to him. His teacher, Eli, helps him understand. Then Samuel has to respond to the call he is hearing.

We need to be awake and alert to hear those inner desires of our heart. St. Ignatius of Loyola would say that those desires help us to hear the call to live the unique purpose for which we were created. Often times we, like Samuel, need a guide, a spiritual director, a mentor or teacher to help us discern the call. Lastly we need to respond, take a step in the direction of that purpose. If we remain sleeping and unaware, then we will continue to run to the wrong places and potentially miss an opportunity to respond and live out that call.

Pick up a journal and some colorful markers and draw this weekend. If you don’t feel you can draw freehand just yet, or wouldn’t know where to start, pick up coloring book and crayons. If you don’t have a coloring book, there are plenty of free coloring pages online such as mondaymandala.com to download, print and color. While coloring, ask yourself, “What part of my life, work or relationships feels stagnant or asleep? What would I be willing to invite in to change that?” Then listen, really listen to the inner part of you that knows the answer and is longing to tell you. Listen with the ear of your heart (Prologue of the Rule of St. Benedict). Take some notes, journal, write it down. You don’t even have to do anything with that information yet. Just listen and watch to see what shows up in your life. I’ll check back again during the year on this. Feel free to send me a message if you want to share some of thoughts before then.

Create joy, Deena

Images: Blog cover; a page in one of my art journals from 2020, created as part of a class but then also written about in my photo journal soon below.

Wonder and wandering

On By dpavinatoIn Daily Prayer, Doing what we love, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Spiritual JourneyLeave a comment

Today we celebrate the Solemnity of Epiphany of the Lord. We remember the visit of the three wise men, bearing gifts and paying homage to the infant king they were searching for. Today and tomorrow, the Baptism of Jesus, mark the end of the Christmas Season. It went too fast for me this year. I cherished the long (albeit shorter this year) waiting and reflecting time of Advent. Then Christmas, New Year’s Day and today’s feast of Epiphany were over in two weeks. I love the readings of the Christmas Season, taking time to remember what truly matters in life and the colorful and bright lights that remind us of the Light that has come to illumine the path for us.

I heard and read so many beautiful reflections on the Epiphany this weekend, as I hope you did, I can’t think of anything to add to them. So I reflected on the search of the three wise men, kings of the Gentile world, seeking and having faith in the journey they were undertaking. Most of us start the new year with an intention or purpose, something we seek, as we begin the year of 2024. I was in conflict about some of the intentions I was clarifying in my mind and ways I was hoping to find the answers and direction to their accomplishment. It wasn’t that the practices were unethical or contradictory to my faith, but I wondered if I was placing my focus on the right things. Would those things bring me closer to God? How was my 14-day health reset program that I will begin on January 15th, for example, making a difference in my spiritual life? The answers came as I wandered through two practices I began in the New Year, or the week before.

I mentioned, last week, the 90-day program of contemplative prayer and reflection, based on Ignatian Spirituality and the Spiritual Exercises. These early days of the program invite us to reflect on the love of God for each of us and the Principles and Foundations of St. Ignatius’ Spiritual Exercises. The basic premise of the Principles and Foundations is that we are created out of love, in order to praise God’s infinite love and goodness, and by dedicating our lives to his service in order that we may enter eternal life with him. The desires of our heart then, those intentions we name each year, are given to us to attain the specific purpose we have been created for. So, we pray for the right disposition, a perspective as we make decisions, that will help us live that purpose. We hold on to the things that bring us closer to God and let go of the things that hinder that. What a simple and easy way to make decisions!

As I consider my 14 day health reset program, will losing weight and drinking my NingXia Red juice bringing me closer to God? No, not in and of itself. However if the program helps me stop the self sabotaging behavior of ignoring my feelings and distracting me by eating the wrong foods, that don’t help sustain my body in this world, then yes! The program will help free me from the stresses of this world and turn to God when I am in worry, stress or despair. It will be a physical, emotional and spiritual cleansing if I pay attention during the process and make appropriate decisions.

The other program, to mention quickly, is the “Divine Rhythms” course by transformational life coach, Leah Darrow on the Hallow app. Routines, according to Leah, help us stay focused, in a world full of distractions, and create a sacred space to discover and live our divine purpose. Our personal life purpose is to align our lives, in our unique way and varying interests, with God’s divine purpose. As we define our interests and routines for each day, we create a way to be who God called us to be in life. Discovering and creating our daily routines, helps us consider the desires of our heart and then create a life that sets time aside to do them and discover how they are helping me live that divine and specific purpose I was created for.

On the Solemnity of the Epiphany of the Lord, there is a lovely practice of blessings our homes for the year. Hopefully your church or place of worship has provided some blessed chalk for you to use. There are a variety of blessings online (just Google, Epiphany House Blessing or search Epiphany of the Lord on Facebook) that you can use. I will provide a link to a blessing that our founder of Ignatian Ministries has published (also available for free download on our website). Even if your chalk isn’t blessed, if you have some, make the markings of the home blessing, indicated below, and read the blessing by Becky Eldredge, or a blessing you find on Facebook.

20 + C+M+B + 24

The numbers of 20 and 24 mark the year, the letters in the middle are said to represent the three wise men, Caspar, Melchior and Balthasar and secondly, represent the Latin phrase which translates to “May Christ bless this house.”

It’s a beautiful tradition I love to practice each year, updating the year, reading a prayer and then blessing my doorways, inside and out, for all who live here and all who may enter, blessing the home, keeping us safe and protecting us from evil. This year I also pray that within this house I spend time on the things that matter most.

Lastly as we end the Christmas Season, I offer this guitar rendition of We Three Kings and Coventry Carol (the carol that remembers the death of all the innocent boys King Herod had murdered seeking to destroy the infant King he perceived as a threat to his reign). Spend time today reflecting on the desires of your heart and ask whether your daily routines and activities bring you closer to their accomplishment and are in service of the divine purpose for which you were created.

Wishing you abundant blessings this year, Deena

Image: my photo of a nativity scene with the three kings in Assisi, Italy

We Three Kings/Coventry Carol – Steve Adams

Epiphany House Blessing by Becky Eldredge and others

Quietly contemplating the new year

On By dpavinatoIn Doing what we love, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Spiritual JourneyLeave a comment

This week has been a perfect week to reflect on the past year of 2023 and look ahead to 2024. I had the week off from my part-time ministry position. The bookends of Christmas and New Year’s Day (tomorrow) have provided an opportunity to rest and relax, visit with family and friends, clean and organize (not as much as I hoped, but a feeble attempt), take some classes and start getting ready for some new programs in 2024. The clouds and softly falling snow this afternoon provide the perfect backdrop for a day of reflection, my favorite way to spend New Year’s Eve.

I pause today thinking about friends or people I am aware of that have lost loved ones in 2023. This morning I woke at 4 and happened upon the recording of the funeral Mass yesterday for the newborn son of one of our Diocesan Directors. My heart broke as I watched him carry the casket of his son down the Cathedral aisle. I have sent condolences to friends and acquaintances that lost parents, children, or good friends. There have been many impacted by changes in jobs or what a job has required. We have watched the horrors of political wars on innocent children and civilians. We cry for our environment and those impacted by flooding and fires. We begin a year hopeful and yet, there are times that we cannot control the unforeseen circumstances of life. It can be paralyzing. Should we just throw our hands up in the air, should we even plan or focus on desires for the new year?

Yes, we should, and not only should, but we must! I reread my post from last year regarding planning for the new year of 2023, the planners I ordered and the desire to focus on Being more than Doing. It can seem insignificant in a world with so much tragedy but we must hold on to the hopes and dreams of the daily life. Today on the Feast of the Holy Family, I contemplated the journeys they took to avoid the wrath of a political king who thought his power would be usurped by an infant king. Even without social media, I am sure they heard of the horror of innocent male children killed by the fearful Herod. They followed their hearts and the guidance of God, they returned to their home town of Nazareth and went on with life.

One of my undertakings for 2024 is a 90-day daily program of contemplative prayer. I began early because I want to finish by Holy Week, the last week of March. This week, one of the reflections was scripture by the prophet Jeremiah, chapter 29, verses 11-14. I was feeling sad, alone, worried and then listened to the words of the prophet: “For I know well the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare and not for woe, so as to give you a future of hope. When you look for me, you will find me…I will let you find me, says the Lord, I will change your lot…and bring you back to the place from which I have exiled you.” The prophet was speaking to the those exiled in Babylon, but I believe that he speaks to me, to us, today too.

So I have asked myself, and invite you to consider, where have I felt exiled and without hope?

Our plans and our goals for the new year are a way to claim those places, listen to the desires of our heart, and begin to find hope in a future that can be different. I believe with all my heart that God desires us to be happy, to find joy in life. Will the intentions I write in my journals or my 14-day health reset program, that begins in mid January, change the world or solve climate change? Of course not, but the healthier and happier I am, the easier it is to be available for others.

When we are focusing on what we desire in life, most importantly for me, to grow spiritually and closer in my relationship to God, and then find ways to live more authentically, honoring the wisdom of my years and experience, I will naturally want to share that joy with others. When I read the verses from Jeremiah, I felt God asking me to trust, to believe that there is more to unfold in the plan for my life, desires that I may have set aside that I can revisit. Those hopes and dreams are placed in our hearts for a reason. It is not only ok to listen to and acknowledge them, it may be part of our response to God given the talents that we have been gifted with.

All week I have tried to get clarity and journal my plans and intentions for 2024. As I do my Examen of this past year, I am grateful for the ways that God has showed up for me, providing the graces of insight, encouragement and support. I don’t know what surprises 2024 has in store for us, but I hope that I live each day to my fullest potential and to encourage others to do the same. Spend a few minutes today or tomorrow looking back and acknowledging moments that you are grateful for. Name and give thanks for them. Then look ahead and identify the places that hold opportunities for growth. What are the things that you want to learn and accomplish? Those desires are there for a reason. Don’t be afraid to name them and hear God say “I know well the plans I have for you…a future of hope.”

Wishing you a happy and healthy 2024! Deena

Image: This picture is from my trip to Italy of a restored clock in the Senate Chamber in the Doge Palace in Venice. The zodiac signs represent the Republic. The clock hand rests on the scales. The sign of Pisces represents the shape of the city of Venice.

Advent & Christmas 2023 – O night divine

On By dpavinatoIn Catholic faith, Every day Catholic, praying for peace, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Spiritual JourneyLeave a comment

It’s a dreary Christmas Eve morning, cloudy but the fog of yesterday and last evening has lifted. I have my Advent candles lit for the last time, all the Christmas trees and other decorations lit. The lights bring a welcome and comforting light to the drab day.

We began Advent with one candle and now the four brightly glowing candles remind us of the Light that has come into our world. We can rejoice that on this evening, over 2000 years ago, a Savior was born. The fulfillment of all the Old Testament promises, a promise of hope, came into the world and we too can live in hope. It seems quite poignant to me this year that the Holy Land is not able to celebrate Christmas and cities are filled with refugees seeking a promise of a better life. It accentuates our need for hope and peace. Let the final Advent candle, and the white Christ candle, remind us that there is a promise of Peace that we can cling to.

As we move from Advent later today, considering my time of prayer and reflection, I am always relieved that Christmas is an Octave, an eight day celebration of the birth of Jesus. If the last couple of days leading up to Christmas have been hectic and not enough quiet reflection time, you still have time after tomorrow. Spend time considering whether Advent and Christmas were all that you hoped for. If not, what can you do to change that? What grace can you pray for during the Octave of Christmas?

This year I wrote the Christmas letter for our Ignatian Ministries blog, Into The Deep. I scheduled it to post late this evening and our subscribers will receive the email and link to the blog tomorrow morning. If you have time late this evening (after 10 p.m.) or tomorrow after all the activities with family or friends settles down, I invite you to read it. We are so grateful for all that was birthed with Ignatian Ministries this year, it had lots of unexpected surprises but oh so many graces! Just like Advent is for each of us, we started with our prayers and desires, listened and discerned along the way, and said “yes” to those moments that felt like invitations from God. As in our individual lives, those “yeses” bring us to celebrate Jesus, and our relationship with him, each and every day.

I pray that the Light of the Christ Child illumines and fills your heart and home as we celebrate Christmas.

Peace, Deena

Photo: My Advent candles

Advent 2023 – O Come, O Come

On By dpavinatoIn Catholic faith, Daily Prayer, sacred waiting, Spiritual JourneyLeave a comment

In years past I arrive at this point of Advent wishing I spent more time in prayer and reflection. There are things I would have preferred to done more of but feel I have entered this season of waiting more than years past. I find myself a bit sad for a different reason – this third week of Advent is our final week! The Fourth Week of Advent is only one day, for that matter, a partial day, next Sunday because it is also Christmas Eve.

My favorite week of scripture, all the special Gospels to savor in the Christmas narrative, will be this week, along with all the baking, card writing and sending, and shopping. However, not feeling well last week and part of this week, has helped me to focus on what really matters this year, and I have been trying to approach the season with a different, more simple, attitude. My sister-in-law and I chatted this week about all that we have and are grateful for, what we desire this year is to spend time together and enjoy the gift of family and friends. So, yes, I have a list of desired outcomes for each day, but what gets done, is what will get done. I would rather arrive at Christmas with love and joy instead of a frenzied attitude.

As we enter the final week before Christmas, today, December 17, begins my favorite days of Advent with the recitation of the O Antiphons with the Magnificat (Mary’s song of praise) each night with Vespers, evening prayer. We know them from the famous carol, O Come O Come Emmanuel. The seven titles of the Christ are sung, or recited, each evening to call upon Christ to come and save His people. Each prayer is short, a single line, invoking God based on the messianic hopes from the Old Testament.

For example, today’s Antiphon is Wisdom or Sapencia:

O Wisdom of our God Most High, guiding creation with power and love; come to teach us the path of knowledge.

You can find them online, written or sung. I love the sung version that St. John’s Abbey provides for us each year. You can find the daily Antiphon on their website or on YouTube.

As I mentioned, this week is rich with the familiar stories of the months leading up to Jesus’ birth; the dream of Joseph, the angel promise to Zechariah, the Annunciation or visit of the angel Gabriel to Mary, the Visitation of Mary to Elizabeth, Mary’s canticle of joy (the Magnificat) and then the birth of John the Baptist.

As we enter this final week before Christmas, I invite you to read the Gospel for each day and then recite (or listen to) the O Antiphon for each day. As you pray the Antiphon each day, consider the grace you seek. What do you call upon God for? I can’t think of a better way to end each busy day, then a few quiet moments reflecting on what we are preparing for!

May you find peace and joy in these final days of Advent. Deena

Advent 2023 – Comfort not comparison

On By dpavinatoIn Catholic faith, Daily Prayer, Every day Catholic, sacred waiting, Spiritual Journey, Uncategorized1 Comment

The first reading from Isaiah for the Second Sunday of Advent begins with the word “Comfort”. I was not feeling comfort yesterday. I having been feeling well this week, and lost my voice. Well, not entirely but I didn’t have as much voice as I needed to proclaim the readings this week as lector for Vigil Mass. I spent Saturday resting and picking up some items to soothe my throat and buy some groceries. I wasn’t shopping or preparing for the holidays as I felt I should have been.

Last night I listened to the Saturday reflection for the Hallow app’s Advent series. The presenter for the series indicated that on Saturdays they would play music to contemplate and rest in. This week’s song was “O Come, O Come Emmanuel” by the Benedictine of Mary, Advent at Ephesus. I instantly felt myself calming down. Advent at Ephesus has been my favorite Advent reflection music since Fr. Gary Blake introduced it to us before Mass or during Holy Hours years ago.

As I calmed down I asked myself whether it was just my disappointment in my voice or something else stirring within. I realized quickly how comparison was weighing me down. Others have shopping done, I haven’t started except for the ideas in my mind. I am receiving Christmas cards and mine aren’t written yet. How did I have time to make cards while working full time and now, working part-time, I have to resort to buying them. Speaking of working, I compare my previous income to my current and I can go in a tailspin of worry. I look at my beautiful decorations and then see posts of bigger trees, prettier lights, cheery mantles and festive table settings. I read Advent reflections, online and in books, and think other writers are more intelligent and profound in their Advent pondering.

St. Peter asks the most important question in the second reading for this week, “Since everything is to be dissolved in this way, what sort of persons ought you to be, conducting yourselves in holiness and devotion….” I don’t think the reading suggests that we give up our holiday celebrations and gift-giving but it does ask us to put things in perspective.

If we aren’t careful we can get lost in the rush during this season, meant to be one of waiting and contemplating. Find time to slow down this week and reflect on the true reason for our joy and celebration. Prioritize your quiet reflection time amidst the other activities. Ignatian Solidarity Network has a lovely online Advent calendar and asked yesterday, “What opportunities exist for you to practice simplicity this week?”

Be grateful for the things you have and the talents you have been given. We are each created as unique and special beings, find comfort in that instead of comparing yourself to someone else. I will try to do the same.

Peace, Deena

Photos:

Cover Image – my reminder “ornament” to find find calm in the midst of chaos

Our Advent wreath at Holy Family Church

Advent 2023 – Wake up, be watchful and alert

On By dpavinatoIn Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Spiritual Journey3 Comments

We begin the new liturgical year today with the First Week of Advent. Advent is our season of waiting. The gospels ending the year, this past week, and beginning now in Advent invite us to be vigilant, to be watchful and alert, to be aware of the times that we forget what our true purpose in life is, growing closer to God as we wait for Jesus’ coming at Christmas and to welcome Him when He comes again.

I spent Friday and Saturday this weekend at the Benet House Retreat Center at St. Mary Monastery. I am an Oblate of St Mary Monastery so Benet House has always been one of my favorite places to go and pray. The retreat was an Advent “Hiding Place” Retreat offered by Lorene Knobbe, Assistant Program Director for the retreat center. It was a silent retreat, so I was looking forward to the quiet reflection time in between the four sessions reflecting on each week of Advent. Many of the rooms in the center look out at the beautiful grounds of the monastery so there is always an abundance of birds and wildlife that pop into view and make the scenery even more enjoyable and peaceful. I always see deer. As a matter of fact my desktop photo is of two deer I saw there several years ago.

As we began our retreat the group mentioned they just saw deer in the large grassy area below our meeting room. Another woman mentioned on Saturday, a deer was below the window as she opened the blinds in her room in the morning. I kept watching and waiting. As I was in my room gathering my things, looking out the window again, I thought, I’m so surprised the deer let me down this visit. I got in my car, backed up and turned to leave the parking area and saw a white tail. I pulled up further, alongside the open area next to the retreat house and saw the two beautiful creatures in my photo this week along the tree line gazing back at me. I smiled, thanked them and immediately thought – be watchful and alert, I am here, feel my gaze upon you.

During the retreat Lorene kept reminding us to sit quietly and feel God’s gaze upon us. I love this and often try to enter my prayer time in this way because of a virtual study program I took with Fr. Timothy Gallagher, O.M.V. on spiritual discouragement. He also begins his Daily Contemplation series on the Hallow app with this invitation to feel God’s loving gaze.

If we aren’t watchful we can miss a sudden sign or nudge to move closer to God. If we aren’t vigilant about our emotional well-being, the concerns of the season can overwhelm and distract us from the experience of hopeful anticipation. If we aren’t careful the noise of the world can move us away from the peace and calm we find resting in God’s presence in prayer and reflection.

I always try to pick up a book in one of the sitting rooms at the retreat house, even though I bring a bag of books and resources that I want to reflect on during my stay there. This trip a book of Rumi’s writing immediately caught my eye. I would like to share this with you:

The Beauty you craved in things was always my face seen through a veil.

Turn around.

See now where the beauty comes from.

How might you find some time to set aside and let God’s loving gaze come down upon you? What are some things you might change this Advent to be more watchful and alert? What grace do you seek, or is there an intention you would like to set, during this season of quiet waiting?

Then watch; watch for opportunities to turn to God instead of giving in to the anxieties or busyness of the holiday season and watch in hope for signs of God’s presence in your life.

Advent blessings, Deena

p.s. I also want to say a note of thanks to each of you who read my blog. I began a year ago, in November, on the first Sunday of Advent. I have enjoyed the feedback you have given, online or in person, and am grateful for the opportunity to share my thoughts with you.

Images: Advent wreath – KaLisa Veer on Unsplash

Photo: My photo of the deer at Benet House Retreat Center

When it is revealed

On By dpavinatoIn Catholic faith, Doing what we love, Every day Catholic, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, sacred waiting, Spiritual Journey, Uncategorized2 Comments

On three different occasions this week I was involved in a conversation with someone who said “I could never…” or basically, “I don’t see myself having the talent to”…. I have to admit that in one of those conversations, I was the one saying it.

I picked up my copy of The Word Among Us this morning and saw the November title and theme of “Already and Not Yet.” The editor and president quoted the letter of St. John saying “We are God’s children now; what we shall be has not yet been revealed. We do know that when it is revealed we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is” (1 John 3:2). I understand that Jeff Smith is talking about the heavenly kingdom, the promises of Baptism and our citizenship in heaven, but it made me pause a moment and think about those conversations this week.

In meetings this week, for Ignatian Ministries, and our continued discernment about the ways we accompany others in their lives of faith, we reflected on where we were at this time last year and how things have been unfolding in a very exciting way. There are days that we are surprised and in awe. There are days we question what lies ahead. The discernment process we engaged in, and our openness to the promptings of the Spirit, allowed us to move forward in faith and trust in what God was revealing to us. I believe we can do that as individuals as well. But we have to be willing to state the grace we are seeking, listen in prayer for the voice of God to respond to us, or fill us with a sense of joy and consolation so that we know we are on the right track, then begin to take action as the opportunities unfold before us.

I think back to last year, as I prepared to begin this blog in Advent, for the beginning of the liturgical year in the Church. I would never have imagined being at the point of publishing 50 posts! I am quite confident I said something to the effect – “what could I possibly have to write about?” Yet each week, an idea or nudging from the Spirit has guided me to a topic to reflect on.

Where might you be limiting yourself by saying words like “I could never…” “I don’t have the talent to…” or “I would love to but…”?

The first step might be as simple as exploring what it might be that you would love to do. I find journaling a helpful way to explore those thoughts and ideas. But I have to make myself actually sit down, consistently, so that the ideas get to the paper! One of the journals I use is a 5 year memory book. I have noticed lately it is filled with statements, for the previous year, regarding the weather that day, appointments I had or friends I visited with. Those are great memories to look back on, but I am going to challenge myself to make more soul statements – what’s on my mind, what would I like more of in my life, what are the important decisions I am faced with? Then as I reflect back next year I will be able to look back at the things that were “already and not yet” moments to see if they have become more tangible in my life experiences.

Join me, in whatever way feels comfortable for you, and let’s see how the year unfolds!

Prayerful and abundant blessings, Deena

Image: A picture from my Italy trip of a mosaic at the Vatican of Jesus calling Peter and Andrew to follow Him.

Guide our feet into the way of peace

On By dpavinatoIn Catholic faith, praying for peace, sacred waiting, Saints as Models & Guides, Spiritual Journey2 Comments

In the tender compassion of our God, the dawn from on high shall break upon us, to shine on those who dwell in darkness and the shadow of death, and to guide our feet into the way of peace. (Benedictus, Canticle of Zechariah – Morning Prayer)

As I continue to recover after my trip, today is shaping up as another day to stay in and rest. I guess if the results were different I might be tempted to get ambitious and do more than my body is ready for. As my friend, and healing arts practitioner, Kate Brown cautioned me yesterday “You need rest. Active rest. Sleep… be patient and allow yourself to heal.” Patience…I am not very good at it!

This time of waiting, and resting, has allowed me the opportunity to tune in to the services and bulletins from the Vatican by Pope Francis praying for a ceasefire and an end to the violence in the Holy Land, especially in Gaza. At Ignatian Ministries, we joined the world in prayer, on October 27, with a rosary at 11. LaSalle Catholic Parishes held a beautiful rosary, in English and Spanish, for peace on Friday evening (you can still find it on their Facebook page. I think our need for prayer continues so you might enjoy praying with it.). Then Friday night, I watched the Rosary and Prayer Service, with Adoration and Benediction, held earlier in the day in St. Peter’s Basilica on Vatican News. Fr. Carlson coached us, during our pilgrimage, to learn the Hail Mary in Italian, so I tried my best to pray in Italian but soon found responding in English easier. Again, patience….

Having just been to the Basilica the previous week, I felt I was attending along with the other clergy and pilgrims who were participating on Friday. I looked at the sanctuary and the statues that I gazed upon not so long ago. I looked at the marble floor that demarkates the size of other Basilicas in the world and where they would fit inside St. Peter’s. St. Peter’s is the largest Catholic Church in the world. In the floor of the central nave, as you move forward toward the sculpted bronze pillars and canopy that cover the baldachin, or high altar, there are circular markings and the names of the basilicas. I have attached a picture at the bottom of this post of the marking for our National Basilica of Immaculate Conception in Washington D.C. I recall thinking that we have our individual buildings and structures, the circles were symbolic for me, we are one holy and apostolic church.

I also pondered the weight of the concerns that Pope Francis must carry; prayers for peace in the world, prayers for those impacted by the mass shooting in Lewiston, Maine, prayers for all those impacted by the hurricane in Acapulco, Mexico, prayers for answers for climate change and prayers for the Church and the closing of the Synod. Yet, despite all the worries and criticisms he faces, when we saw him in the Papal Audience, you feel the joy in his spirit, the love of God being shared with each of us.

Is it prayer and faith that brings that level of peace and patience? This feels like something for me to reflect on in my life. I reflect on St. Catherine of Siena’s devotion to the Eucharist and think more time in prayer and adoration might be a worthy goal for more peace and faith in my life.

While not related, I can’t close this blog this week without talking about three very special days this week. As we bring October come to a close, I have to mention three of my favorite days; Halloween (All Hallow’s Eve), All Saints and All Souls Days. It’s true I love to share all the pumpkins, black cats and spooky images of Halloween but really for me it is a threshold space, a holy time to think about and ask for the help and guidance of the Saints and the ancestors as we prepare to bring the year to an end (liturgically and then soon after the calendar year). In past years I have participated in retreats or days of reflection, calling upon the wisdom of those gone before. This year I plan on time alone, quiet reflection with a candle and sacred images, reading and prayer. Another Old Country tradition is to place a candle on the tombstone of loved ones on the evening of All Saints Day. I have found myself using electronic candles so the flames don’t go out but my intention is there. The light helps wandering souls or is viewed as an offering to help guide a soul on its way to Heaven. The Day of the Dead, Dia De Los Muertos, celebrated on November 1 and 2, is another beautiful tradition of visiting gravestones with candles, flowers and celebration to honor those who have passed on.

Perhaps you might create a ritual for yourself as we cross from October to November. What saints (big or small S) do you turn to for guidance? Who might have a message that you need right now?

All you holy men and women of God, pray for us!

Deena

The post image is from Assisi with the word Pax (peace) sculpted in shrubs.