Notice what you are noticing

At times during the week a topic for this blog will evolve and begin to take shape. It might be a book, a quote, a class I took, etc. But a thought emerges and I ruminate on it throughout the week. Some Sunday mornings I wake up and ask for inspiration. Then there are days like today, well, weekends really, that I am bombarded with similar ideas from random places. I could journal for weeks on the things that have captured my attention!

One of the books I ordered to read this weekend is Discovering Your Dream by Gerald Fagin, SJ. It’s a little primer on an Ignatian approach to discernment and decision-making. I didn’t have anything specific in mind regarding discernment, just to continue to learn more about the topic. As I mentioned last week, it’s an ongoing process in life. Fagin says “discernment presupposes that life is a mystery to be lived out, not a problem to be solved.” People use the words spirituality, prayer, meditation and discernment so freely today it can be difficult to find things that will be useful or beneficial to personal and spiritual growth. One of the things I have found helpful is the adage to “notice what you are noticing”. God is at work in the people, encounters, situations and dare I say, even the things we read, around us. God is at work, personally, in my heart and in yours, each and every day.

I couldn’t help think about the mystery and unfolding of God in the events of Maria Shriver’s life as I read her Sunday Paper today. She revealed a meditation she had while in Cambodia, regarding birthing a new version of herself, and then a visit to the hospital with her daughter upon their return. While waiting outside, she helped a nurse deliver a baby in the parking lot! She concludes with a suggestion that every day is a chance to begin again or birth a new version of ourselves. She also mentioned that maybe God is trying to get her attention…notice what you are noticing.

Richard Rohr’s Daily Meditation, Evolving Faithfully, today acknowledges that everything is and keeps changing, that God “keeps creating things from the inside out”. He surmises that many people want instant or quick solutions versus a “universal pattern of growth and healing—which always includes loss and renewal. This is the way that life perpetuates itself in ever-new forms: through various changes that can feel like death.” It’s a helpful reflection for me as I look at what is happening in the world, both in the environmental and political landscape, as well as the evolving aspects of my self, the parts that I want to let go of and the parts I want to birth.

As you pay attention to the changing aspects of who you are and who you want to be, pay attention to those who stand in your circle, your “tribe” or supporting cast. In today’s Gospel, Mark 6: 1-6, Jesus is “amazed at the lack of faith” of those around him. He is in his home town and surrounded by people that have watched him heal and work miracles, yet, they question the things he says to them.

I appreciated Diana Butler Bass’ reflection today, Sunday Musings, regarding their unbelief. She suggests that unbelief isn’t an idea about God but a “disposition of the heart”. She says that Jesus was amazed at the lack of trust they had or their inability to have faith, he was alone and perhaps, Diana says, a little heart-broken. But the highlight of the post was: “The truth is that we need others to rise to our fullest abilities; there are certain things that can only be done with the love and trust of those committed to being there with and for us…Faith and trust are necessary for wisdom, to heal what is wounded, to cast out injustice, and to care for all those in need. Ideology will only divide us more deeply. Those idea-tribes are killing us, separating us.”

As we listen to and become more aware of the desires of the heart that emerge in prayer and reflection, we must also acknowledge the parts that are ready to fall away. We look also for the places and people that stand with us and encourage us rather than hold us back. We may not receive support from everyone, but life’s too short for less than this.

Lastly, consider reading my friend, and author, Judith Valente’s blog post today on a “well-lived life”. As all of these thoughts tumble around in my head this week I will continue to ponder the essence of Judith’s theme to keep focusing on things that bring meaning and passion while considering what a well-lived life might actually mean for me. It’s an excellent read, I hope you take the time to consider Judith’s musings and consider what a “life well-lived” might mean for you as well.

Then this week, notice what you are noticing…Deena

Image: The “Devotion” or Giboshi (refers to the finial used on the bridge and posts) Bridge at Anderson Japanese Gardens was recently reopened after a multi-year restoration process of curing and air-drying the Alaskan Yellow Cedar and then constructing the bridge. Our docent advised us that as we crossed the bridge we were invited to leave the dust of the world behind us, inviting us to a time of peace and serenity during our stay in the Gardens.

Ever growing desire

My niece’s daughter, Genevieve, is going to be 6 this week. She loves to play, craft and create. She really loves her Legos! Last year she worked on a Cinderella castle for ages 12+. It took her a little while longer than her normal creations but I believe she was done in less than a week. The kits for children her age are done in no time. She began with the smaller combinations of regular pieces, then advanced to the small kits with specific designs and now loves the more challenging ones. She gained one level of skill and then advanced to the next, desiring to learn and do more.

As we bring June to a close today, I would like to talk once more about the topic of Who am I in God? What is God calling me to see, to be, to love in my life? Then I will pause it, at least for a while. A few people commented to me, after reading the past few blogs, that they really hoped I found what I was searching for, that it seemed I was really searching for something in my life. I guess on some level I always have been and will likely continue to be searching for deeper meaning and greater depths of understanding in my life. But it is more like peeling back layers of an onion or going deeper into the middle of a spiral. At Ignatian Ministries, we refer to that as “called deeper together”, to go beyond the shallow waters and into the deep waters of faith.

We don’t get a Catholic education in grade school, or as CCD students, and then stay at that level of understanding all of our lives. At least I hope we don’t. Genevieve would quickly be bored with working on Lego kits at a level for 5 year olds. Go to church or not, I believe it’s an important aspect of faith and community, you will be bored with your faith if you stay at a grade school understanding of it. Growth happens as we look for new ways to understand the Mystery of God and its meaning in our lives.

The practice of Lectio Divina, sacred and prayerful reading of scripture, is part of my Benedictine Oblate practice. Listening to and reflecting on the Living Word of God in scripture each day, and our additional study, whether in books, retreats or more structured study programs, should take us deeper and deeper in our understanding of who God is calling us to be in life. We go deeper into that spiral, finding new meaning, based on the desires of our heart and the circumstances in our lives.

I love the First Principle and Foundation of Ignatian Spirituality, to live with God forever, but the depth of the spirituality comes in daily prayer, daily examen and discernment. It is an ongoing process. God loves each of us, uniquely and passionately, where we are in our state in life. It doesn’t matter if someone else is further along or has a greater depth of understanding. We are where we are, with all of our desires and situations, and God wants to meet us there.

Go ahead, touch the tassel of Jesus’ garment today, (today’s Gospel reading is Mark 5: 21-43) let him turn to you and talk to you. Have a conversation regarding who you are and what you are called to be and to see, right now, today. Keep having those conversations, they will change over time, as you do!

Wishing you overflowing peace today, Deena

Image: Sen on Unsplash

A discerning spirit

On Friday I was chatting with Becky, the founder of Ignatian Ministries, the non-profit Ignatian virtual ministry that I work for. I shared with her a decision that I am holding and how I have been wavering as I decide the right thing to do. She reminded me to use the four steps of discernment, as we do with everything we do in our ministry. Ignatian discernment is not decision making from a strictly rational or practical perspective. It is noticing the movements of our heart and soul. All of who we are, our thoughts, feelings and emotions, are part of what we notice and bring to awareness as we use those insights to decide where God is leading us. Sometimes it is quick but often it will take time to really listen and notice how we feel as we consider the options we have in front of us.

As I continue to consider Who am I in God? What is God calling me to see, to be, to love in my life? in my personal life and in this blog for the past four weeks, discernment must play an important part in answering those questions. I thought about that as I read Maria Shriver’s Sunday Paper this morning. She asked poignant questions after reading the final words of someone who had died, preparing those words before her passing, and after a trip to Asia to see one of her children working in Thailand. Maria asked: “What does it take to love the life we’ve been given? What does it take to be joyful, to feel we have enough, or even to feel like we won the lottery?” My personal answers to those questions have been becoming more clear lately but I acknowledge it is a process and I know that there is something that I need to do, in the near future, that will continue to bring clarity to my answers. What I do know, at this point, is that those answers lie in knowing our purpose in life.

I also believe that finding the answers, at least long term and deeply fulfilling answers, come from where we turn for them. Oh sure, people can find answers in living day to day and acquiring all the relationships and things in the world that they want but all you have to do is look at the current state of things in our world to know those don’t bring deep satisfaction.

Doing some research for a workshop I am helping to teach tomorrow night, John Hopkins reported, in their Mental Health Statistics (2024), that 18% of people ages 18-54 will have an anxiety disorder, 9.5% of American Adults ages 18 or over will suffer an illness labeled as depression (not just having a bad day, another study indicated that it means feeling depressed each day for two weeks or more) and 26% percent of Americans will be diagnosed with a mental health disorder every year. Those numbers are staggering to me! I think it gives us some indication that as Americans something is missing in our lives.

As I listened to two different reflections this weekend on today’s Gospel reading of Jesus calming the storm at sea (Fr. Carlson, my pastor at Holy Family Parish, and you know my other favorite, Bishop Barron!) both indicated each in their own way, Jesus is waiting for us to rouse him to help as we navigate the decisions and storms in life. If we continue to let Jesus sleep in the boat, if we attempt to go it alone, then we cannot expect the tranquility that the Christ can bring to our lives. In prayer and with prayer, I can invite Christ into the inner cave of the heart where I know and can find the answers and peace that I desire in life.

Are there storms you are navigating? Are there questions you are holding and just can’t seem to decide what to do? Do you have peace with your purpose and place in life? If not, maybe finding a new way to approach the answers, turning to prayer and discernment, just might be an option to try.

To learn more about Ignatian Spirituality, discernment and prayer follow our blog, Into the Deep, which I post weekly and also write for, as well as our upcoming retreats and courses. You can also read more about using discernment in your life by accessing the free prayer resource, The Four Steps of Discernment written by Becky Eldredge.

Photo: seaside port of Cascais, Portugal taken during my 2015 pilgrimage to Spain and Portugal