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A lost sheep

I woke up Friday morning from a dream and felt lost. In my dream the school children did a presentation in our church, before Mass, but moved the ambo, altar and tabernacle. As I was helping to remove their displays, a visiting priest came from the confessional. He didn’t know where everything was and I could’t find the items to help. How were we going to go on?

I woke with the realization of the heavy loss and sadness of this week. The loss of our shepherd, Pope Francis, is weighing heavily on my heart.

The week has been full of beautiful tributes and remembrances of Pope Francis’ writings and impact, so I won’t presume that I can say anything different, or more eloquently, than others have already. I have lived in a church and world guided by 7 different popes. Pope Pius XII was only pope two more years after my birth, but each of the other popes since Pope John XXIII have influenced me and my faith in various ways, but none as much as Pope Francis. He focused on themes such as joy, mercy and hope and lived a life that honored the dignity of all people. He asked us to hear the cry of the earth, our common home, and the cry of the poor and respond with love. He called us to evangelize with our lives and let our joyful way of living be the way we share the Gospel with those we encounter. His smile radiated love and compassion. These teachings, his spirituality and catecheses on other topics, were tenets that I resonated with, more than any other pope, therefore I feel the loss more deeply.

I watched the Requiem Mass live from the Vatican on Saturday morning and thought it was so fitting for the person he was and the way he lived. If things can be simple by the standards of the Vatican, and all the trappings of being Pope to a church of a reported 1.4 billion people, I think it was. I captured images so that I can recall the day, but as I watched the Mass and journey to his final resting place, I was especially moved by two images, that I felt represented the man that he was. There was something very poignant about the unadorned casket in St. Peter’s Square. Later, as the proceedings came to a close, I loved watching the white “Pope mobile” travel the city of Rome from the Vatican to Santa Maria Maggiore, where Pope Francis has been laid to rest. The Pope’s body moved through the streets of Rome among his people, close to the people, just as he preferred his pontificate to be.

I was fortunate enough to visit the Basilica of Santa Maria Maggiore during my 2023 pilgrimage and now that his tomb is open to the public as of today, Divine Mercy Sunday, I have a reason to want to return.

The picture that I used for this blog image was taken during our general audience with Pope Francis in St. Peter’s Square. I posted it on social media this week, and in 2023 during our visit, it’s my favorite picture from the pilgrimage and I am delighted I hadn’t used it in a blog post previously.

So now I turn my prayers to formidable task ahead for the College of Cardinals. I pray for the future of the Church and for the Holy Spirit to guide the cardinals to select someone with a pastoral spirit similar to Pope Francis and with a heart and mind capable of offering wisdom to leaders in the world today.

Wishing you abundant trust in God’s mercy, and a heart full of joy and hope, Deena

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Clinging to hope

“Thanks for inviting me!”, one of our Oblates said sarcastically during our monthly meeting and discussion on Saturday morning. We had been discussing our chapters on water and the oceans from On Care for our Common Home, Laudato Si: The Encyclical of Pope Francis on the Environment with Commentary by Pope Francis and Sean McDonagh.

In the book, the author cited a United Nations report in 2008 that an estimated 8-9 hundred million people in the world experienced water shortages. I wondered what the current situation was so I Googled it to learn that between 2-3 billion people experienced water shortages for at least one month per year. The United Nations site, UN-Water.org in preparation for World Water Day in March of this year, shares that 2.2 billion people live without access to safe drinking water. This is not water shortage but on a daily basis do not have clean water to drink or use! We talked about the impact of pesticides, the current situation in California due to the life-impacting fires and the consequences of putting out those fires or houses and cars burning to drinking and ocean water, and we honestly discussed our overuse of water and other impacts to the environment. I shared that the Great Pacific Garbage Patch is now considered to be TWICE the size of Texas, the whole state of Texas, not Dallas or Houston, 1.6 square kilometers. While it is true that it contains marine debris, it is also rapidly accumulating plastics and other garbage. This post is not about water or the environment. But it is one of the many things that can completely overwhelm a person if you seriously think about it for any length of time.

We spent considerable time discussing, and praying (a beautiful prayer led by fellow Oblate, Karen), for those impacted by the fires in California. Needless to say it wasn’t one of our more uplifting gatherings! But in a way, it was. Our prayer and discussion led to the hope that we can and do make a difference.

This morning I read Maria Shriver’s Sunday Paper, What Angels Do, and read about the impact of the fires on her life, her community and her state. It is hard to wrap your head around the devastation to the communities, families and homes in California. Even though it’s hard, we can’t turn our minds away from it when the news reports change. The lives of those people will continue to need our prayers and assistance. Maria ended her newsletter with words of hope, “Dare to dream, to grieve, to let go, and rise again”.

Tomorrow we face a time of change in our country. It’s hard for me to fathom that for the first time in our country’s history we have elected a convicted felon to lead our government. You may be too young (I hate that I am now old enough to start saying things like that) but I remember a time that disgraces by leaders would lead to a resignation from the highest offices in our land and states, or would at least result in a period of public apology for tarnishing the esteem of the position. I understand that people voted on a single issue or that they have hopes that the cost of groceries are suddenly going to decrease on Tuesday. But I cannot understand the means to the end.

But just as this isn’t about water, this post is also not about politics. It is about finding and having hope regardless of what is going on around us.

Pope Francis intended to have his autobiography, Hope, released after his death. But to coincide with this Jubilee Year of Hope in the Catholic Church, he has released the book early (I hope way too early!). The message of Pope Francis to various audiences and on different topics is to “face the future with hope”. I have ordered and look forward to reading about his youth and family life, his vocation and his thoughts on leading the world-wide Church. I look forward to words of hope and encouragement. I wrestle with the state of things but then look to this man who never ceases to care for those in need and for peace in our world. He is a man filled with hope that the world can be a better place and sets a personal example doing so.

Lastly I end with words by Kate Bowler, author and podcaster, shared on social media this morning.

This world. Impossible. Unthinkable…

Help us to know what to feel – rage, grief, sorrow.

And what to do – advocate, protest, lament…

God, give us hope that seems hard to find.

Visit Kate on Facebook or Instagram to read the entire “blessing”/prayer.

Whatever we can do, whoever we encounter each day, let us find a way to offer hope and encouragement. One person, one small act can have a huge impact. Whatever is going on around us, let us not forget that!

Wishing you abundant peace and hope, Deena

As a note, I intended to write about the power of mindset, acknowledging our gifts and talents, the blessings we have in life and then choosing to use our gifts as a way of responding to all we have received but I could not set aside the desire to write about hope. Using our gifts and talents to make a difference is a way to express hope. Stay tuned later this week, I may write another mid-week reflection.

Photo: noticing a beautiful sunset appearing later in the day, a sure sign of hope that Spring is on the way.

Ever flowing source of grace

I’ve always wanted one of those fountains that is constantly flowing, the water recycling back to the top so that there is the continual movement and sound of water. Earlier this week I watched my favorite gardening channel on YouTube, Garden Answer, as they installed a new fountain in the middle of flower beds on their property. Seeing it installed rekindled a desire to have one. I know there are smaller versions that would be better suited for my small yard and patio, but of all the things I want for my yard, that probably isn’t on the top of the list. However, this weekend the image of the fountain of ever flowing water came to mind for a couple of reasons.

On Friday, for Ignatian Ministries, we hosted a virtual gathering of spiritual directors for a quarterly “collective”. The presenter led us through a discussion of images of God and how helping a directee reflect on and gain better insight of their image of God is beneficial in spiritual direction. The person who led prayer offered a litany of words to invoke possible images. Two that glimmered for me were “wisdom” and “Sophia”, words that have been on my mind this week in morning prayer reading scriptures from Sirach and Wisdom. “Send her forth from your holy heavens and from your glorious throne dispatch her that she may work with me, that I may know what is pleasing to you. For she knows and understands all things, and will guide me prudently in my affairs and safeguard me by her glory.” Wisdom 9: 10-11

On Saturday, I listened to a presentation by Sr. Miriam James Heidland, SOLT, for a women’s faith conference earlier this summer, reflecting on the gift of God’s love as the source “from whom all good things come” (Collect, Tenth Week in Ordinary Time). In our littleness and narrow perception, we limit the abundant love and goodness that God has for us and can either “resist, reject or refuse” that love. When we do, we close ourselves off from seeing and responding to the call and the generous gifts we have been given. But even if we do, the love never ceases.

Today I reflect on Pope Francis’ call, the 9th anniversary, for a World Day of Prayer for the Care of Creation. This year’s theme is “Hope and Act with Creation”. The earth is a continual act of creation and new birth. But we must protect it. Pope Francis says “To hope and act with creation, then, means above all to join forces and to walk together with all men and women of good will. In this way, we can help to rethink, ‘among other things, the question of human power, its meaning and its limits.'” The beauty of creation in forests and wild flowers, beautiful clouds and sunsets, the soothing sounds of ocean waves or the bees busy this morning flying in and out of my purple petunias all reflect limitless creativity and generous love. How I treat and care for creation limits my response to God’s love, it does not limit the lavish love God pours into creation each day.

My point in each of my examples is that God’s wisdom, love for us, and constant gift of creation is endless and abundant. Each day is a gift if we slow down enough to embrace it. No matter what we have done or been in life, we cannot turn off the unceasing graces that are there for us, if only we will receive them. We have to open our hearts, that are often frightened and hardened by the world, to allow that love to flow freely from God to us.

This Labor Day weekend, let us pause from our labor and busy lives, and reflect on this bountiful love, a love that never stops flowing out to and upon us.

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Photo: A fountain in a piazza in Assisi, Italy

Peace be with you

Maybe my mood is a bit more somber today because of the rain and gloom compared to the radiant sunshine of the past three days. So, I reflect, Thank you, God, for Divine Mercy Sunday! I don’t know about you but I can be Thomas on many days – I won’t believe unless… I can fill in the blanks with a variety of concerns or issues and then the desired outcome. Even though I have seen countless appearances of God acting in my life and the lives of others, I easily forget and let “dark clouds creep in and cover up the sun” and get discouraged. “We wonder if the sun is still up there. And perhaps we begin to get discouraged as our faith and trust start to waver and change to doubt and distrust.”

This quote is from the book, 33 Days to Merciful Love, by Father Michael Gaitley. I have used this book three different times over the course of seven years and found myself picking it up last night after attending Vigil Mass for Divine Mercy Sunday. I prayed the Divine Mercy Novena this week, beginning on Good Friday, and hope to attend a Divine Mercy Sunday celebration this afternoon in LaSalle at St. Hyacinth’s Church. I have had a few challenges over the past couple of weeks, so I found myself opening to the section, Week Four, Into the Darkness.

The book is a 33-day personal retreat (but often studied together in groups, as I did the first time) in preparation to consecrate our lives to Merciful Love. Through our prayer, study and offering we offer ourselves to Jesus and let his consoling love transform us into saints. The book is focused on the life and spiritual teaching of St. Therese of Lisieux and incorporates some of the teachings of St. Maria Faustina Kowlaska, best known for her writing on Divine Mercy and the Divine Mercy image. I have never been the biggest fan of St. Therese and her “little way”, but somehow her teachings shows up when I need them. My mother had a great devotion to her, so I wonder if Mom is tugging her sleeve at those times that I need a reminder of St. Therese’ trust even in dark and difficult times. Early on in the study we consider that sin (I replace with doubt and lack of trust) comes from a lack of faith in God, God’s Word in scripture and God’s goodness. Fr. Gaitley offers the premise that this is the deep root of the darkness in the world, people act as if God does not exist.

Yesterday, in my monthly Benedictine lay Oblate gathering, we studied Pope Francis’ 2015 Encyclical Letter Laudato Si: On Care for Our Common Home. A few lines have been on my mind since re-reading the assigned sections for our discussion. In #92, Pope Francis says “We have only one heart…” and any act that would mistreat an animal or another creature, creation in general, is “contrary to human dignity.” The darkness in the world feels that we do not live with that one heart of love and compassion for all we have in this world and for each other. So we offer our plea for mercy as we pray and repeat, in the Chaplet of Divine Mercy, “have mercy on us and on the whole world”.

Perhaps we need to embrace those days that we are more like Thomas and ask for a sign of God’s presence but then wait in hopeful anticipation for consolation versus living in doubt. We pray and place ourselves in the presence of the fountain of Mercy, over and over again, clinging to the love Jesus offers us, as St. Therese did. As Fr. Gaitley points out in a summary section, it isn’t about getting rid of the difficult and dry times in our faith lives, it’s about finding peace, joy and happiness in the midst of all the challenges and gifts of each and every day.

This Second Sunday of Easter, Divine Mercy Sunday, is such an important reminder for us to reach out to the extended hand of our Lord as he says to us, “Peace be with you.”

Peace, Deena

Image: Resurrected Jesus, Side Altar Holy Family Church

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A Golden Ribbon of Compassion

I had planned to write about grief, faith and the Gospel for the Fifth Sunday of Lent, the death of Lazarus and Jesus weeping for his friends. We have been looking at grief and letting go of strength, instead replacing holding on with tenderness and vulnerability in my Lenten Retreat – A Different Kind of Fast. It’s been a hard week for that study so I had been contemplating what to write about. But compassion took hold of me in a different way this weekend. I receive a daily email from Franciscan Media called Pause and Pray. Saturday’s prayer inspired me to take a different direction for this weekend. I will share the prayer at the end of this blog post.

It seems like it has been at least a few years that we have heard of an increasing number of natural disasters and changes in our weather. This week we have continued to see California bombarded with snow, rain, flooding and then a tornado! Just this weekend there were devastating, and fatal, storms in Texas and Mississippi. We can disagree what we call it or the reasons for it, but our weather is changing.

I attended a celebration of life the summer after my cousin died in 2019, and spoke with her husband, a retired geologist, and asked him what he thought of the changes we were all experiencing and if we had time to turn “it” around. He advised that climate change was real, talked about ways he experienced it in his studies and that while there was time, it was more urgent than people supposed. I was already a student of Laudato Si’, the first papal encyclical, written by Pope Francis, to focus on care for creation as a moral obligation. So that conversation renewed my personal passion to stay informed and attempt to make a difference.

This week, on March 22, we celebrated World Water Day to promote awareness about the water crisis in the world. There are approximately 2 billion people (numbers vary by source) living on our planet without access to safe, clean drinking water. The concept of World Water Day was proposed in 1992 by the United Nations and in 1993, the first World Water Day was promoted. It may seem like this is only a problem that impacts countries like Africa or areas impacted by disasters like Turkey during the recent earthquakes, but recent issues with the Flint, Michigan municipal drinking water crisis have shown us that issues can occur even in the U.S. Eight years later they are still dealing with the situation! Eight years in the United States; how can we not have the expertise to resolve this, which occurred as a result of switching the water source from a Detroit source to the Flint River? Unconscionable! I switch out and provide clean drinking water to my cats more than people in this world are able to obtain clean water. Sometimes we have to put things in perspective of our use of the resource to realize how fragile it is.

I know it seems overwhelming. It’s hard to make changes when is easier to do one thing instead of another. Then to rationalize it, we pause and ask how a little change in our daily use of resources, like water, can make a difference. It does and it can!

The environment is a common good according to Pope Francis’ teaching. He says there is an interdependence in our relationships with God, our neighbor and our planet. We have a moral responsibility to have concern for our neighbor and the planet we are passing along to future generations. Picking up a six-pack ring (and cutting them open if we discard them) so that it doesn’t end up as a hazard to fish and seagulls in the ocean can make a difference. Every year countless wildlife die due to water pollution. Reducing single-use plastics and disposable products that will end up in landfills and water sources can make a difference. Reducing our water use at home can make a difference. I was astounded to read that an average shower uses 17 gallons of water and a single toilet flush uses 7 gallons. It’s staggering. Maybe we can’t change all the ways we use water each day but perhaps our awareness can prompt us to make small changes. I paused as I grabbed for a small water bottle at a recent meeting, chastising myself for not being better prepared and bringing water in one of my stainless water bottles. I could have passed from taking the bottle, replacing consumption with sacrifice, as Laudato Si’ calls us to do. Seriously, one little bottle Deena? Yes, one little bottle is one less being used. Lent is certainly a great time to ask ourselves to consider how we consume things.

I am going to challenge myself to be more aware, reignite my involvement in Care for Creation and remind us, occasionally, of our impact on the planet. There is a Lenten action calendar on the Laudato Si’ Lent website and there are great suggestions, and an abundance of information, on the World Water Day link, please check them out and consider how you might make small changes in the use of the resources of our common home.

The prayer from Franciscan Media’s Pause and Pray on March 25:

In meditation,
imagine our threatened,
blue-green planet and its people,
with their hungers, wars, joys.
Then see this globe wrapped 
in the gold of compassion,
brought by you and millions of others like you.
From horizon to horizon, it shimmers.
Humanity heals. 

Peace, Deena

Image from Resources for World Water Day 2023