Category: Coming home to myself

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Spirit that reveals

On By dpavinatoIn a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, contemplation, Daily Prayer, discernment, Every day Catholic, Gifts of the Spirit, Holy Trinity, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, Our Lady of the Way, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Teachers and Guides on the journeyLeave a comment

On June 11 of this month, Sojourners Magazine reflected on the life and teachings of American Christian scholar and theologian, Walter Brueggemann. Brueggemann, who passed away on June 5, was a great teacher, and an influential interpreter, of the Bible and especially, the Old Testament and biblical prophets. His most influential work, The Prophetic Imagination, challenged us to see the world as God sees it and overcome the limitations of our present reality. In 1985, he wrote, for Sojourner, “The Spirit works through us, among us, and even against us. The Spirit in these days would indeed work against our hopelessness to let us hope.” A poignant message for us given the state of the world.

This Sunday, June 15, is the Solemnity of the Holy Trinity. We often try to give images and roles to the Trinity in an attempt to understand the inexplicable relationship of God in three persons, Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Brueggemann once wrote that the purpose of doxology, an expression of praise or liturgical praise, is to defy reasoning that tries to explain what God in the Trinity is. We can’t, so perhaps it’s better to just sing!

This week I have been praying with an 8-Day Retreat on the Gifts of the Holy Spirit, presented by Our Lady of the Way Retreat Ministry. Day 6 focused on the Gift of Understanding. The prelude to the prayer states: “Understanding is one of the seven gifts of the Holy Spirit that enables believers to comprehend the truths of faith through both reason and divine revelation….With the gift of understanding, we can grasp divine mysteries of faith that surpass human reasoning.” That was a helpful reminder as I approached Trinity Sunday.

I can’t possibly grasp the concept of Trinity with my feeble human intellect. I can read, pray and contemplate the relationship between the “persons” of the Trinity but at some point I have to accept it on faith. I can also, reflecting on Bruegggemann’s statement above, hope to grow in understanding and allow the impact of the Trinity to reveal, guide and be at work in my life.

Give Us This Day published a reflection entitled “Sustained Attentiveness” by Brueggemann on Friday of this week, certainly planned far in advance of his passing. In it he wrote, talking about Jesus’ “radical interpretation” of the Torah, “finally he will say at the end of the chapter, “Be Perfect” – be whole – have integrity – be about one thing in your life. Be in sync with God. But such being in sync requires, as serious Jews have always known, swimming upstream against ordinary social practices.” Brueggemann went on to suggest we see the church as a body of coworkers who walk a different path in the world and that we live together “for the sake of the world that God loves!” He said we cannot “be the church by accident, but only with obedient intentionality.” In that Sojourner article, mentioned above, they quoted Brueggemann saying “the practice of prophetic imagination … requires energy, courage, and freedom, and the sense of being otherwise. And I have no doubt that we are now arriving at a moment when there is no more middle ground.”

As I pray for peace in our fractioned and turbulent world, and integrity within our policies and caring for the good of all those in society, I ask for the gift of understanding. I pray, also, to be transformed by the gifts of knowledge, fortitude, counsel and wisdom so that I may live in sync with God, radical in justice and mercy. Then, as St. Ignatius teaches, I will desire and choose only that which helps me attain the end for which I have been created.

Wishing you abundant gifts of the Spirit this week, Deena

Image: my favorite icon of the Trinity, created in the 15th century by Russian iconographer, Andrei Rublev.

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A heart burning with desire

On By dpavinatoIn A life worth living, a season of hope, Coming home to myself, contemplation, Daily Prayer, discernment, Easter Hope, Every day Catholic, Ignatian prayer, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spiritualityLeave a comment

Last week I saw the movie released about Blessed Carlo Acutis, the impact of technology on us, and how Carlo used technology, by creating a website on Eucharistic Miracles, to spread his message of the importance of the Eucharist. Carlo was a 15-year-old Italian teenager known for his devotion to the Eucharist. His canonization, as the first millennial saint, was postponed, from April 27, due to the death and funeral of Pope Francis. Besides being an amazing young man, he is also the new patron of the Catholic grade schools that will consolidate in my home town area in The Fall. I attended the movie with two friends, Kelly and Mark. Kelly and I are parish point people for the Eucharistic Revival, for which Carlo is a selected “intercessor”, so we enjoyed seeing the bonus video at the end with highlights from this past summer’s National Eucharistic Congress. As I watched it I felt my heart fill with the same emotions that I experienced during the events of the Congress in July of 2024.

But, I wondered where those feelings of excitement and passion for the Revival went? Did they leave me, were they lost forever? Did I just get busy and forget about the importance of the topics discussed during the keynote speeches and guided prayer? Did I let others things take their place?

Later in the week, I talked to my spiritual director about my experiences during Lent, Easter and the death of Pope Francis. I commented that life got so busy at the end of Lent, that I felt I rushed through those final sacred days of Triduum and Easter. While I felt Lent and Holy Week were deeply transformative this year, I lamented that I didn’t want the intensity of the penitential days to go away. I wanted to be transformed by them, to make sure the experiences carried on beyond the Easter season. I wanted a life that reflected my beliefs as I mused on how Pope Francis lived his life. He was a Jesuit during his priesthood and papacy, keenly aware of the teachings of St. Ignatius, shaped by the Spiritual Exercises and discernment. He was a Contemplative in Action, one of the ideals of Christian life and Jesuit spirituality. He lived what he believed.

I asked “who am I now that Lent is over?” How do I feel I am being called to live the grace of resurrected life beyond Easter?

It became clear as we talked that rather than viewing these feelings as regret over something that didn’t last, it was, in fact, an invitation by the Holy Spirit to go deeper, to enter the mystery and grace of life with the risen Christ more fully. The desire was welling up in such a way that the resistance to moving in that direction could easily feel like sorrow and discouragement. I prayed for the ability to see that truth more clearly as I discerned what I was being called to. Later that day, I reflected on the gospel story of the disciples on the Road to Emmaus (Easter Wednesday, Luke 24: 13-35).

In the gospel account, Jesus walks with some of his disciples, who are so focused on his death, they can’t recognize who is standing in their midst and what is happening as Jesus discusses all the prophecies of his ministry, death and resurrection.

My heart burned with desire to live life differently, so much that I almost missed the invitation to go deeper. I focused on what I thought I lost instead of the Spirit inviting me into a deeper union.

How often do we miss these occasions of grace? How often do our hearts burn to move closer to Christ and our mission in life? How often do we pray and focus on the change we desire that we miss a potential opportunity to look at a situation in a new way?

Would you be willing, this week, when things look like they aren’t going the way you would like them to, or you are wrestling with a deep desire for change, that you might pause and look for a threshold moment to live in deeper grace, faith and hope? What are you being called to embrace, what new perspective is waiting for your glance and awareness?

As always, I would love to hear from you, in a private message or in a comment, as you reflect on these invitations this week.

Wishing you abundant peace and hope, Deena

Photo: a fire burning at Stronghold Retreat Center this weekend.

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A pilgrim journey

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Easter Hope, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, Lenten journey, sacred seeing, Seeing things in a new way, Spiritual Journey2 Comments

Our Lenten journey has brought us to the glorious Feast of Easter, it is the Solemnity of all Solemnities, a joyful conclusion to our Lenten penances and the beginning of the Octave of Easter (Easter is eight days long!). I wish you and your loved ones a grace-filled Easter Season!

If you participated in the Triduum Services of the Lord’s Supper, Good Friday and Easter Vigil, there is so much to reflect on from the solemn liturgies we prayed with and today we celebrate the gift of God’s love in the Resurrection. A few thoughts came to mind as I reflected on my own journey through Lent.

Meditations written by Pope Francis for the Good Friday Way of the Cross in Rome’s Colosseum explained that the world we are faced with can be cold and calculating, that we become prisoners of ourselves when we focus on selfishness and indifference to those in need. Writing about and using the analogy of each of the Stations, Pope Francis explains our human journey and that only when we focus on the way of Christ, are we able to make sense in our lives, to bring about a restoration of joy and we feel as though we have come home.

Pope Francis’ meditation reminds me of the essence of a book I read during Lent, Jesus and the Jubilee; The Biblical Roots of the Year of God’s Favor by Dr. John Bergsma. It’s a deep and profound study of the history of the Jubilee Year in the Church and an invitation to reflect on this current Jubilee Year of Hope 2025, as a way of life, not a single, special event in the Church. He shares practical ways that we can bring the Spirit of Jubilee into our lives. We reflect on how we might make Jubilee a lifestyle and encounter the liberty that Jubilee offers us. If I approach the crosses of daily life with a heart of the Beatitudes and the “divine economy” of God, then we are able to experience the liberating grace of Jubilee.

I spent time on Holy Saturday reflecting on words written by Fr. James Martin, S.J. for America magazine on waiting. Fr. Martin wrote that most of our life is spent waiting. Our days waiting aren’t always “the unbearable pain of a Good Friday. Nor are they suffused with the unbelievable joy of an Easter.” Most days, Fr. Martin proposes, are “in between”. We wait for changes in circumstances, health, job, and relationships. I know I often think, “when this happens” (whatever “this” is), then I’ll be happier or find more peace, that my life will change or be better. But, our waiting becomes bearable when we change our approach to the outcome we desire and when we choose to wait with hope.

As I look back on this Lent, I’m a little sad it has ended. I have benefited from the extra prayers and practices. I have grown and changed in ways I hoped to, but desire so much more. That, I suppose, is our Easter pilgrimage, a journey that continues beyond this Lent and each day of our lives.

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Image: A fresco of the women encountering the angel at the tomb of Jesus, painted by Fra Angelico viewed in the Museo di San Marco in Florence, Italy.

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Cultivating beauty

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, A life worth living, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Doing what we love, Every day Catholic, la dolce vita, Lenten journey, Life in the Spirit, mindfulness, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, seeing beauty around me, Seeing things in a new way, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Teachers and Guides on the journeyLeave a comment

On March 24, for the Third Week of Lent, I read the following quote by Joan Chittister, in her Reflection Resource, Cry Justice, Cry Hope, and I began implementing the practice of being, or at least attempting, to be more aware of beauty around me, with a strong desire to cultivate it more within me.

The purpose of life is to cultivate the sacred in ourselves so that we can come to know God before we see God. Goethe puts it this way: “A person should hear a little music, read a little poetry, and see a fine picture every day in order that worldly cares may not obliterate the sense of the beautiful that God has implanted in the human soul. ” This week, follow Goethe’s advice. Every day this week, list one way that you tried to “cultivate beauty in the human soul. ” In your own life … in your neighborhood … in the world.

––from Cry Justice, Cry Hope by Joan Chittister

I think that is why I love having a garden, keeping fresh flowers on my kitchen counter each week, like the daisies in my blog photo, or creating little vignettes of objects in my home. Looking at something beautiful uplifts and inspires me. It does as Sr. Joan suggests, help me see God in the world around me. After reading Sr. Joan’s quote, I want to raise my awareness of the beauty I see around me in the world. I want to make a conscious effort of cultivating beauty in my life so that I might create more beauty in the world. It’s going to be a work in progress for sure!

This weekend I was blessed to be a participant, virtually, in a retreat being given by my friend, author Judith Valente for the Associates of the Sisters of Charity of Nazareth in Kentucky. The presentations by Judith and by Brother Paul Quenon, her friend, co-author of books and a Trappist monk at the Abbey of Gethsemani, were wonderful but perhaps my favorite was Judith’s talk on Saturday evening, “What can we learn from Italians this Lent about living more mindfully”. So many of the practices, la dolce vita (living the sweet life), that Judith discussed are practices I grew up with or still make part of my life. Sunday meals at my Italian grandmother’s home while growing up, the art of sitting and engaging in conversation over coffee, as well as visiting our family cemetery plots to clean up and remember our beloved deceased.

My return to Italy in the Fall of 2023 rekindled a passion for living and savoring the good life. My friend Kelly’s visit to Italy this past week, and pictures she shared of a family dinner gathering, reminded me of the graces of sitting down together for aperitivo, good food, wine and conversation. I tend to rush through dinner, if I even make it, instead of savoring the slowing down of the day before the quiet time of evening.

As a note, you will be able to read more of Judith’s reflections on life in Italy in her new book, The Italian Soul: How to Savor the Full Joys of Life, which will be released on May 5. (Click on the link to preorder it.) Judith’s book will help us learn to look more deeply for beauty in life and experience the grace of the present moment, the life we are living. It is not only an Italian way of life, but a spiritual lifestyle. It is the same awareness that Goethe and Sr. Joan Chittister are encouraging us to have.

So this week, I invite you to look for and instill more beauty in your life, just as Sr. Joan and Judith have excited in me a desire to look for more awe-inspiring moments in the everyday. Look for, and pause to savor, these moments when you encounter them. Create them in your daily living and the way you express yourself in the world, with your family and in your home.

In a previous blog post I mentioned a new practice of keeping an ongoing list of my daily gratitude, tracking the sequential numbers versus jotting down three new entries each day. To this practice I have added an area to reflect on beauty that crossed my path each day. Besides my daily spiritual and creative reflections, I write in my daily Examen journal the consolations or graces and desolations each day. Before those movements of the Spirit, I note my reflections of gratitude and beauty. I have included a sample of today’s page, in this blog post, before writing in it later today. Try it and let me know what you think.

Wishing you abundant peace and this week, la dolce vita! Deena

My daily Examen journal image:

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A story to tell

On By dpavinatoIn a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, contemplation, Daily Prayer, discernment, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, Ignatian prayer, Jubilee Year of Hope, Lenten journey, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, sacred seeing, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality4 Comments

You’ve probably heard or used the phrase, “what’s their story”, when someone is inquiring about another person. It suggests that the person in question has a backstory or anthropology that will help us understand them more deeply. This week was a wonderful lesson in being open to learning more about others and being open to what might be going on behind the scenes of the exterior I am seeing. I have two examples that touched me and a captivating discussion I would like to share. They have radically changed my outlook and I hope you find them helpful as well.

This week in spiritual direction I was sharing my need to grow in compassion and patience with others, especially when out driving and doing errands. I try to be courteous and mindful of others but darn, there are days I feel like I am the only one. I am working on stopping a negative or condemnatory response before it explodes in my mind. My director shared a video, made by Cleveland Clinic, that she has used when working with others. It is helpful when trying to be more compassionate and understanding about what might be going on in another person’s life. Wow! Tears flowed. The video, Empathy: The Human Connection to Patient Care, was made in a hospital setting sharing thoughts of various individuals working at or experiencing treatment at a hospital. It’s only slightly over 4 minutes. I highly recommend it!

After watching that video, I am trying to look at others differently, with more openness. As I walked around a grocery store yesterday, I felt the desire to be more tenderhearted. Later in the day I found an interesting new page to follow on Instagram (but also on Facebook), a_mug_of_life. A young filmmaker in England began posting his encounters with others by offering them a cup of tea and asking them to share their story and letting them know he was going to film their discussion. He only has 8 posts so far this year and every single person captivated me. Ordinary looking people with amazing stories of courage, perseverance, love and tenderness. Stories that I wouldn’t know if Will hadn’t offered them a cup to tea and asked them a few simple questions about their life. I look forward to new videos! I was grateful for the timely reminder, after watching the Cleveland Clinic video, of the stories that people are walking around with.

Earlier in the week I watched an interview of Padraig O Tuama, a poet, theologian and conflict mediator that I read and follow. The interview was done by, author and podcaster, Kate Bowler. If Kate sounds familiar, I’ve shared her writing in the past, but last week shared parts of her interview with retired Duke basketball coach, “Coach K”, regarding leadership. I like Kate but I was very curious because this wasn’t an interview pairing I would ever have imagined. Padraig was brilliant as usual, especially talking about his experience with conflicts in Ireland and his perspective on ways to see political conflict differently. He shared some precious examples of leading retreats with children and allowing them space to encounter Jesus in their imaginations, highlighting in a different way, what can happen when we nurture openness and creative thinking. Finally he shared how he approaches groups when doing conflict mediation, using the Johari Window concept of the fourth quadrant, what is unknown to the self and unknown to others. He explained that it is useful to begin by saying, I don’t know why any of those gathered are there and that, initially, what holds the group together is just the physical space of being there. He said it is fruitful to begin with an openness and willingness to nurture that space without expectations. It might allow for the imagination and curiosity to occur. Kate acknowledged that this might be helpful when we are afraid that division will “take us all apart”. Padraig replied, “Division is everywhere, the question is what we do with it.” His perspective was refreshing.

I might not be able to impact a lot of people by implementing these simple things I was reminded of this week. But I certainly can try to be more open and curious when listening to others and a little more compassionate about what others might have going on in their lives when I encounter them. I dare to say that this perspective would do us all a bit of good.

I’d love to hear from you if you have the opportunity to watch the videos or visit Will’s social media page.

Wishing you abundant peace this week, Deena

Photo: A piazza in Assisi where I enjoyed an expresso during my 2023 pilgrimage.

Simple Joy

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, A life worth living, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, contemplation, Daily Prayer, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, mindfulness, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, Spiritual Journey, spiritualityLeave a comment

On Friday as I was preparing to drive back home after a doctor appointment, I remembered that the Chicago Cubs Spring Training game was about to begin. I opened the sports app on my phone and clicked on the game. I was immediately treated to images of sunshine, short sleeves, people enjoying the day on the outfield grass areas and players warming up on the field. Then I heard the voices of the announcers, it was like hearing the voice of a friend that you haven’t talked to in a long time. As I drove home and listened to the game, I was filled with a lightness and feeling of normalcy that I haven’t felt in a long time. For a few hours, the world disappeared in the background.

Earlier in the week I opened an email from National Geographic with a stunning photo of a young student in India running down a steamy railroad track in the Ghum station of the Darjeeling Himalayan Railway. The writer/photographer (Sara Hylton) was writing of this experience in India. She has been living there, escaping life in the West after the death of her father. In that instant the figure caught her attention and she captured the photo of the young boy. She stated that her journey of grief, and daily activities in India, transformed her. She learned that “it’s that what comes next will bring its own magic. New colors, more light, waiting to be revealed.”

Fortunately, as of 5 a.m. this morning, Pope Francis was reported to have had a “peaceful ninth night” in the Gemelli Hospital in Rome. The news of his illness has been of a great concern to me, my friends and the world. Pope Francis is a pervasive voice of hope, love, peace and care for the world, especially those in need. We need his voice now more than ever. I worry for his health and well-being, but for the world if we lose this great shepherd.

The news with the disturbing images of chainsaws and gloating posts of migrants detained in chains with the comment “this will make you feel good” can send me over the edge. How can this possibly make anyone feel good? As mentioned last week, I have been staying away from the news. But even in an attempt to find and share something positive on social media, the glaring images overwhelm the page, resulting in less time spent there as well. As a result, life has become more quiet and peaceful each evening in my home. I enjoy the silence for reading and reflection. I even began a jigsaw puzzle! Although I can’t say that that has been a stress free experience! My friend, Cindy, assures me I will develop a process and rhythm to putting puzzles together. I will focus on that bit of encouragement.

So, where do we find relief? I suggest in the simple joys of watching the sunrise or sunset, with each sunset getting later and later each day. I dream of my plants that will begin to emerge with warmer days. My heartbeat calms watching the total bliss and carefree spirit of a sleeping cat. I look forward to meeting with a friend to discuss her plans for her trip to Italy (and potentially my own). I began reorganizing kitchen cabinets this week. I may not be able to control the chaos in the world but I can create order in the small details of my life and home. As St. Teresa of Avila is quoted as saying “The Lord walks among the pots and pans”.

In this book, The Joy of Discipleship, Pope Francis, says “Dear friends, be glad! Do not be afraid of being joyful! Don’t be afraid of joy….” Speaking of the joy that comes from closeness to God, from God’s presence in our lives, he encourages us not to be afraid of this joy and share it with others. I believe that joy comes to us in plain and uncomplicated ways if we are open to seeing it.

I invite you to consider the simple ways that you can find joy and peace each day. They may be things that you are doing every day. Linger in them just a moment longer. Notice and be present to them offering a word of gratitude for them. I am convinced that in doing so, we will see and experience moments such as these even more.

Wishing you abundant joy and peace, Deena

Reminder: A Lent Night of Reflection entitled “Make My Heart Like Your Heart: Encounter and Change of Heart” will be held on Thursday, March 20 from 6:30 – 8:30 p.m. Central Time. The suggested donation for the event is $19. I continue to think about the best registration process for this first offering but it might be as simple as a PayPal or Venmo payment. During the event we will reflect on the things in the world that consume our heart and attention, our need and desire to give and receive forgiveness, and ways that we can pour out our love to God in a personal and sincere way. I am excited to offer this and I hope you will be able to join me. Thank you to those who have let me know you are interested! For now, you can email me, private message me or add a comment to this post on my website adding “Retreat” to the beginning of your comment and I won’t approve (or will hide) that comment to be shown on the website.

The light we carry

On By dpavinatoIn Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, contemplation, Daily Prayer, discernment, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, waiting and reflecting2 Comments

By the great and small lights we mark our days and seasons, we brighten the night and bring warmth to our winter, and in these lights we see light…” (Catholic Household Blessings & Prayers)

Today is Candlemas. In many churches and parishes the faithful are invited to bring candles to have blessed for use during the year. The candles represent the Light of Christ in the world. Today is also known as the Feast of the Presentation of the Lord (February 2nd). It is unusual that a Feast Day has priority over a Sunday but has been elevated because it falls on a Sunday in Ordinary Time. Today’s feast is also the official end of the Christmas season marking 40 days after Jesus’ birth and the presentation of the child Jesus in the temple, according to the law. We see and ponder on this holy day the fulfillment of the Old Testament prophecy that the glory of the Lord would return to the temple (Ezekiel 10:8, the glory of the Lord left the temple but will return Ezekiel 43). Simeon, and the prophetess Anna, rejoice as they recognize what is happening. They have been waiting for this day, but they needed eyes to see. They were alert in their waiting and hoping for the coming of the Messiah.

As a Benedictine Oblate, I pray each day to hear the words of Scripture with the “ear of the heart” (Prologue of St. Benedict) but this week I also prayed to see with the “eyes of the heart”. I was seeking to see things in a new way and to have the grace to see where the Lord is leading me (and the Lord did not disappoint!).

As Mary listened to the words of Simeon, rejoicing that he has seen the Messiah but also proclaiming the sorrow Mary will encounter (“and you yourself a sword will pierce”) as she continues her unique journey in and with Jesus, she pondered or reflected on each day with Jesus and what was being revealed to her. We need to have similar eyes of faith as we make our pilgrim journey in life.

As part of night prayer each evening, we pray the beautiful words of Simeon “Lord, now let your servant go in peace; your word has been fulfilled: my own eyes have seen the salvation which you prepared in the sight of every people: a light to reveal you to the nations and the glory of the people Israel.”

May our eyes be open to the Light. May we remember that we carry that Light with us and bring it to others. May we look for the ways we encounter the Christ each day and then rejoice as we close our eyes, as we prepare to rest, each night.

“In the beauty of these candles, keep us in quiet and in peace, keep us safe and turn our hearts to you that we may ourselves be light for our world.” (Catholic Household Blessings & Prayers)

Note: As a follow up to my mention of a new undertaking, True to Self Living, that I will be introducing this Spring or Summer, I would like to share something that I have been praying about this week. I am working on a Lent night of reflection and prayer, later in March. “Make my heart like your heart” will be an evening of listening to prayer, reflecting on the words of scripture as we make our Lenten journey, time for discussion and even a little personal creative reflection for our prayer. More details to follow and I hope you will be drawn to consider this as part of your Lenten prayer.

Freely choose what seems good

On By dpavinatoIn A life worth living, a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, contemplation, discernment, Doing what we love, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, mindfulness, spiritual freedom, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Teachers and Guides on the journey2 Comments

Have you ever spent so much time weighing options, an action to take or a decision to make, that you never really take a step or make a move? “What is the better of these two choices? What if I make the wrong choice? What if I don’t have enough information to decide?” We can paralyze ourselves with indecision.

This past week was the feast day of St. Francis de Sales, a saint known for his kind and gentle spiritual direction. St. Francis de Sales is a Doctor of the Catholic Church, The Doctor of Divine Love. The title of Doctor is given to saints who are recognized for having a significant impact on theology or doctrine as a result of their work and writing/teaching. He was the spiritual director to St. Jane de Chantal, another saint I regard highly because of her courage and patience in the face of the challenges she encountered and her desire to help others, especially the poor. St. Francis de Sales reminded St. Jane, when she desired to enter a religious community after the death of her husband, that there was holiness in her daily tasks as a mother and that being faithful to the real life in front of her each day was a way to become holy. Eventually he counseled her to begin a new order of women, The Order of the Visitation of Holy Mary or The Visitation Sisters. St. Francis also had a temper and struggled with resentment, but he believed that the spiritual life is made up of mistakes we learn and grow from. For this reason, I also have a special fondness for him and his teaching.

He wrote of making decisions, especially when faced with two good options, “as S. Basil says, freely choose what seems to us good, so as not to weary our spirit, lose time, and put ourselves in danger of disquiet, scruples, and superstition. But I mean always where there is no great disproportion between the two works, and where there is no considerable circumstance on one side more than on the other.” He said that we should pray and ask for clarity from the Holy Spirit, seek the guidance of a spiritual director or one or two spiritual friends and then “devoutly, peacefully, and firmly keep and pursue it.”

We can hold ourselves back by saying that we don’t have this skill or aptitude or that someone else is better equipped with a particular gift. We can focus on the abilities of others and neglect to see the good that we can do with the talents we have been given.

Today and last Sunday, Second and Third Sunday in Ordinary Time, the second reading has been from the Letter of St. Paul to the Corinthians. In this letter, St. Paul is advising the church of Corinth that the Spirit of God gives different gifts and forms of service, different parts of the body that all make up the Body of Christ. We are all given our own unique talent to serve those around us. Each of these is necessary for a healthy and thriving community. All of these gifts are valuable to the whole.

In another profound weekly article by Maria Shriver, she considers how to find peace in the world, peace after the devastation of the LA Fires and peace as we navigate change in our country. She states that the way to build something new is to build from within, “to get quiet, to truly bring our peaceful selves to the table.” “Listening, trying to understand, caring for another, loving another, bestowing grace, forgiveness, kindness, and mercy on another—that’s something each of us can do.” Simple but dramatic ways to have an impact.

I have been considering this for myself, in this new year of 2025. Beginning this Spring, I will be adding a new page to this site (or perhaps a new site), mini-courses and ways to connect with each other as I launch a new venture into the world. True To Self Living will be a journey of being our most authentic self in the world. We will use practices from various disciplines such as faith and spirituality, mindfulness, creativity and wellness to live a life that allows the full expression of who we are, a way to come home to ourselves. I believe, like Maria, that when we do this we also have a positive impact on the world.

What gifts do you have and offer to those around you? In what ways do you, or can you, serve your family and friends, making a positive impact on their day? What ways might you get quiet and bring peace and concern, a gentleness like St. Francis de Sales, to those you encounter? Let’s work together to bring peace to the world in a way that only we can.

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Image: a sign I saw on the wall at Tea Room at the Depot in Mackinaw, IL.

Blessing the home of your life

On By dpavinatoIn a season of hope, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, epiphany, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, sacred seeing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality2 Comments

Before sitting down to write this morning I used my blessed chalk to mark the inside and outside door of my home. It’s a beautiful tradition, on the Feast of the Epiphany, in the Catholic Church to chalk the doors and speak a blessing over the home and all who might enter it during the new year. (I have shared the Blessing Prayer in a previous Epiphany post, but you can easily find it online, and have included an image of my door for 2025 on the website version of my blog). It reminded me of a poem I read by Jan Richardson for New Year’s Eve.

Her poem was “This Year as a House”. (You can find it on her Facebook page.) She began by saying:

Think of the year

as a house:

door flung wide

in welcome,

threshold swept

and waiting,

a graced spaciousness

opening and offering itself

to you.

It’s a beautiful poem that reflects on the year being a home of welcome and rest, a place of safety and support for those in need. She concludes the poem with a blessing that the rooms are filled with ordinary grace and light to welcome others home.

Like most of you I have been spending this week reflecting on intentions for the new year. I prefer intentions versus resolutions because they can be adapted and changed as I do through the year. Praying that the words of Jan Richardson’s poem fill my life and home, I am looking forward to a year of rest from the weariness of the world, health in mind, body, and spirit, and an openness to what the new year will bring. I seek spaciousness for prayer, art and reflection, and the graces that those simple activities can bring.

I have started a couple of other prayerful journeys for 2025 and I look forward to attending my friend, Judith Valente’s retreat, next Saturday, January 11, Writing the Prologue to Your New Year (click here to register). I think this will be my third or fourth year attending and find it such a gift to reflect on the past year and then look ahead to this new year.

The Magi set their course based on a star. They charted their journey and kept going until their encounter with the Christ Child, Mary and Joseph. Set your eyes on a star this year. What do you seek? What would you hope to have experienced when you look back on 2025 next December and January?

Wishing you abundant peace and joy in this new year! Deena

Photo: A mosiac of the 3 Magi worshipping the Christ Child from Our Lady of Angels Chapel/nursing home (sadly now closed) in Joliet IL. I used this previously in a post but it’s one of my favorites!

Other Photos: The Chapel of Our Lady of Angels Chapel, the mantel of my door chalked with the 2025 blessing and the Magi added to our creche at Holy Family Parish.

Despair can turn to hope

On By dpavinatoIn Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, contemplation, hope and healing, Life in the Spirit, mindfulness, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey2 Comments

During my mother’s hospital stay, after falling and needing neck/spinal cord surgery then rehab, she mentioned a lump on her neck which the biopsy indicated was cancer. We left the hospital on Saturday with an appointment to meet with a doctor and discuss cancer treatment the following Monday. I was so fortunate that I worked from home and for two amazing women, Brigid and Trish, who understood that sometimes I would be working from the cancer center and that there might be interruptions during the day to care for my mom. I couldn’t have had a better situation at that time, the flexibility so helpful for her two-year battle and the care it required.

After she died I was in a deep despair. I went through the motions of work and the holidays. My mother lived with me, so everything in this house reminded me of her. I would get up from my desk and look toward her chair or the dining room table, as if still checking on her to see how she was doing.

The following January we had an organizational change at work and I was asked to meet with the new director of our department and discuss a supervisor role for the support team for our department that were working in a local customer service center. I met with him, instantly liked him, and he asked me to consider the job. I said that I enjoyed working from home, being productive in the quiet of my home office versus constant activity of a customer service center and asked whether it would be possible for me to work at 2-3 days from home and visit the center and the team the other days. He said yes and we agreed that I would begin the new role. The Friday before I was to begin he called to say that he thought about it and felt that my presence with the team would be required 5 days a week. I was so disappointed and thought about quitting but convinced myself to give it a try. It was exactly what I needed but it took me a few months to see it. Being somewhere else, outside of my house, forced me into new rhythms and being with others. The job gave me a team to care about and make changes that the organization wanted. I had tasks to focus on. I had to trust that life was going to be ok for me again. I had to turn to hope as the way out of my pain.

I read a beautiful post this week by poet and author, David Whyte, (from his book Consolations: The Solace, Nourishment and Underlying Meaning of Everyday Words) who describes despair as a haven, a last protection, “a necessary and seasonal state of repair, a temporary healing absence, an internal physiological and psychological winter when our previous forms of participation in the world take a rest; it is a loss of horizon, it is the place we go when we do not want to be found in the same way anymore.”

He goes on to say that the “antidote to despair is not to be found in the brave attempt to cheer ourselves up with happy abstracts, but in paying a profound and courageous attention to the body and the breath, independent of our imprisoning thoughts and stories, even, in paying attention to despair itself, and the way we hold it, and which we realize, was never ours to own and to hold in the first place.”

If you are feeling despair for any reason this week, please honor that within your spirit. Take the time you need to honor the healing that is required. Don’t run from it. Don’t brush away the feelings as if they don’t exist. Breathe and find ways to honor your body, your spirit and what you need to feel energized again. When you are ready, find activities that nourish your spirit. Be with like-minded people. Ignore negativity as best you can. Realize that true healing only occurs by going through and not around the source of the wound or hurt. Move forward with compassion and curiosity.

Then when you are ready offer the light you are to others. Be a source of hope. We need it now more than ever!

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Photo: Butters in his happy place. If you have one, watch your cat or dog, they embody resilience!