Category: waiting and reflecting

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A lost sheep

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, A life worth living, a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Divine Mercy, Easter Hope, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, Laudato Si, Pope Francis, sacred listening, sacred seeing, season of change, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, waiting and reflectingLeave a comment

I woke up Friday morning from a dream and felt lost. In my dream the school children did a presentation in our church, before Mass, but moved the ambo, altar and tabernacle. As I was helping to remove their displays, a visiting priest came from the confessional. He didn’t know where everything was and I could’t find the items to help. How were we going to go on?

I woke with the realization of the heavy loss and sadness of this week. The loss of our shepherd, Pope Francis, is weighing heavily on my heart.

The week has been full of beautiful tributes and remembrances of Pope Francis’ writings and impact, so I won’t presume that I can say anything different, or more eloquently, than others have already. I have lived in a church and world guided by 7 different popes. Pope Pius XII was only pope two more years after my birth, but each of the other popes since Pope John XXIII have influenced me and my faith in various ways, but none as much as Pope Francis. He focused on themes such as joy, mercy and hope and lived a life that honored the dignity of all people. He asked us to hear the cry of the earth, our common home, and the cry of the poor and respond with love. He called us to evangelize with our lives and let our joyful way of living be the way we share the Gospel with those we encounter. His smile radiated love and compassion. These teachings, his spirituality and catecheses on other topics, were tenets that I resonated with, more than any other pope, therefore I feel the loss more deeply.

I watched the Requiem Mass live from the Vatican on Saturday morning and thought it was so fitting for the person he was and the way he lived. If things can be simple by the standards of the Vatican, and all the trappings of being Pope to a church of a reported 1.4 billion people, I think it was. I captured images so that I can recall the day, but as I watched the Mass and journey to his final resting place, I was especially moved by two images, that I felt represented the man that he was. There was something very poignant about the unadorned casket in St. Peter’s Square. Later, as the proceedings came to a close, I loved watching the white “Pope mobile” travel the city of Rome from the Vatican to Santa Maria Maggiore, where Pope Francis has been laid to rest. The Pope’s body moved through the streets of Rome among his people, close to the people, just as he preferred his pontificate to be.

I was fortunate enough to visit the Basilica of Santa Maria Maggiore during my 2023 pilgrimage and now that his tomb is open to the public as of today, Divine Mercy Sunday, I have a reason to want to return.

The picture that I used for this blog image was taken during our general audience with Pope Francis in St. Peter’s Square. I posted it on social media this week, and in 2023 during our visit, it’s my favorite picture from the pilgrimage and I am delighted I hadn’t used it in a blog post previously.

So now I turn my prayers to formidable task ahead for the College of Cardinals. I pray for the future of the Church and for the Holy Spirit to guide the cardinals to select someone with a pastoral spirit similar to Pope Francis and with a heart and mind capable of offering wisdom to leaders in the world today.

Wishing you abundant trust in God’s mercy, and a heart full of joy and hope, Deena

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The light we carry

On By dpavinatoIn Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, contemplation, Daily Prayer, discernment, Every day Catholic, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, waiting and reflecting2 Comments

By the great and small lights we mark our days and seasons, we brighten the night and bring warmth to our winter, and in these lights we see light…” (Catholic Household Blessings & Prayers)

Today is Candlemas. In many churches and parishes the faithful are invited to bring candles to have blessed for use during the year. The candles represent the Light of Christ in the world. Today is also known as the Feast of the Presentation of the Lord (February 2nd). It is unusual that a Feast Day has priority over a Sunday but has been elevated because it falls on a Sunday in Ordinary Time. Today’s feast is also the official end of the Christmas season marking 40 days after Jesus’ birth and the presentation of the child Jesus in the temple, according to the law. We see and ponder on this holy day the fulfillment of the Old Testament prophecy that the glory of the Lord would return to the temple (Ezekiel 10:8, the glory of the Lord left the temple but will return Ezekiel 43). Simeon, and the prophetess Anna, rejoice as they recognize what is happening. They have been waiting for this day, but they needed eyes to see. They were alert in their waiting and hoping for the coming of the Messiah.

As a Benedictine Oblate, I pray each day to hear the words of Scripture with the “ear of the heart” (Prologue of St. Benedict) but this week I also prayed to see with the “eyes of the heart”. I was seeking to see things in a new way and to have the grace to see where the Lord is leading me (and the Lord did not disappoint!).

As Mary listened to the words of Simeon, rejoicing that he has seen the Messiah but also proclaiming the sorrow Mary will encounter (“and you yourself a sword will pierce”) as she continues her unique journey in and with Jesus, she pondered or reflected on each day with Jesus and what was being revealed to her. We need to have similar eyes of faith as we make our pilgrim journey in life.

As part of night prayer each evening, we pray the beautiful words of Simeon “Lord, now let your servant go in peace; your word has been fulfilled: my own eyes have seen the salvation which you prepared in the sight of every people: a light to reveal you to the nations and the glory of the people Israel.”

May our eyes be open to the Light. May we remember that we carry that Light with us and bring it to others. May we look for the ways we encounter the Christ each day and then rejoice as we close our eyes, as we prepare to rest, each night.

“In the beauty of these candles, keep us in quiet and in peace, keep us safe and turn our hearts to you that we may ourselves be light for our world.” (Catholic Household Blessings & Prayers)

Note: As a follow up to my mention of a new undertaking, True to Self Living, that I will be introducing this Spring or Summer, I would like to share something that I have been praying about this week. I am working on a Lent night of reflection and prayer, later in March. “Make my heart like your heart” will be an evening of listening to prayer, reflecting on the words of scripture as we make our Lenten journey, time for discussion and even a little personal creative reflection for our prayer. More details to follow and I hope you will be drawn to consider this as part of your Lenten prayer.

Advent 4th Sunday – From darkness to light

On By dpavinatoIn advent, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, contemplation, Daily Prayer, Every day Catholic, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Saints as Models & Guides, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Uncategorized, waiting and reflectingLeave a comment

The Gospel for the Fourth Sunday of Advent is the Visitation of Mary to Elizabeth (Luke 1: 39-45). It may be my favorite passage in the New Testament, if not, definitely in the top 5. Once we get to Easter, then the encounter of Jesus and Mary Magdalene feels like my favorite. Here is what I know for sure, each of the New Testament scriptures that touch me most deeply are gospels of encounter.

The image I selected today was a postcard given to me by my pastor, Fr. Tony, in the early years of my adult faith formation. I was beginning to seriously consider what I was being called to do and be in life, what following Jesus means and reflecting on my Catholic faith honestly, all the aspects, worthy and true and sadly, not so admirable. I was considering different ministries and religious communities at the time and we talked about the encounter of Mary and Elizabeth and the opportunities of ministering to other women. This postcard depicts an icon titled “Mary visits Elizabeth” (1984) painted by Sr. Joan Tuberty. I love that their skin tones are darker, as women of the Middle East. I love the soulful gaze of each woman, eye to eye, peering deep, seeing a truth, deeper than the eye can see. In a community newsletter, Sr Joan, an accomplished iconographer, said “Icons are scripture visualized and companions for our spiritual journey.” This icon has been a companion on my journey the past 30 years.

As we end our Advent journey, today and tomorrow, rather than write a reflection for you, I invite you to sit with this icon, or another image that speaks to you, of the encounter of Mary and Elizabeth. Elizabeth realizes who she is encountering in Mary. We wait with peace, hope, joy and love in the only One who can transform our lives and give meaning. Yes, the gathering and celebrations are wonderful. I anticipate the excitement of my niece’s children as they open their gifts. But cliche as it is, there is only one ‘reason for the season’. How will you encounter the Christ Child on Christmas Day? Are you aware of and open to the encounter of Jesus in others and in your daily life? As Fr. Mike Schmitz, Ascension Press, has said in his YouTube videos this Advent, what if this Christmas you didn’t wake up, would you be ready to encounter God?

The Advent season has been a time of preparing – to remember the infant Jesus born to Mary and Joseph over 2000 years ago, the coming of the Christ at the end of time, and the encounter with God we each will experience when our lives have ended. As we have turned the corner on the shortest day of the year and begin to experience increasing light each day, my hope is that your days will be filled with the Light and the incomprehensible Love of Christ for each of us.

Wishing you abundant peace, joy and love, Deena

Note: For those of you who may not be Christian and read this, I apologize for not being familiar with the tradition and rituals you are keeping at this time of year. I wish you the joy of being uplifted by your celebrations as well.

Photo Credit: A Postcard of the icon by Sr. Joan Tuberty, Franciscan Sisters of Little Falls, MN., mentioned in this blog.

Advent 3rd Sunday – From darkness to light

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, advent, Catholic faith, contemplation, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, sacred waiting, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, waiting and reflectingLeave a comment

This Sunday is Gaudete Sunday, the Third Sunday of Advent. We light the rose candle, the joy candle on our Advent wreaths. Gaudete means Rejoice! Even if you have not been familiar with this particular Sunday in the beginning of our liturgical year in the Church, you have undoubtedly heard the Latin word in Enya’s version of O Come O Come Emmanuel or other versions of the traditional Advent song.

As I prepare for Christmas this year, I seek that joy. Not giddy happiness or pleasure but a divine, deeply rooted in the heart and spirit, joy. A joy that doesn’t get squashed out by the stress of not having my baking or shopping done (or started!) or the feeling that the slow-paced prayerful days of Advent are passing me by despite my best efforts to savor it this year.

The world feels dark, easily experienced when turning on the news. I am relieved that the Syrian rebels have sent Assad fleeing from the country after toppling his regime, but now the news of his enormous stockpiling of wealth and the cruel and brutal treatment of prisoners is made known. It is overwhelming. I am not surprised reading a news update that Russia offers him asylum. I even tire of Facebook because of all the ads to shop, none of the ideas that appeal to me for those I want to shop for. There are countless stories of countries, and the people who live there, in need due to weather events. Then there are all the random posts of pets found alone and hungry because people just left them alone when moving. It’s all too much. How, where do we find joy?

Pope Francis has often reminded us to live with real joy. Even as he ages, joy is almost always visible in his encounters with others. In his final event in Corsica today, his 47th apostolic journey, in his homily at a Mass, “the Pope encouraged the faithful to embrace a joyful expectation of the Lord’s coming. Christian joy, he explained, “is neither shallow nor ephemeral”. On the contrary, it is a joy rooted in the heart and built on a solid foundation. He recalled the words of the prophet Zephaniah, who called his people to rejoice because the Lord was in their midst, bringing victory and salvation. “The Lord’s coming brings us salvation: that is the reason for our joy”, he said. This joy, the Pope explained, is not about forgetting life’s hardships but rather finding strength and peace in the presence of God.”” He says that the more we focus on ourselves and the concerns of the world, we lose sight of God’s providence and guidance. The answer lies in prayer and our focus on the promises of Christ. (Source: Vatican News)

In his apostolic exhortation, The Joy of the Gospel, it was determined that he used the word joy 110 times. In his exhortation, Pope Francis writes about a joy, living a life with Christ and the Gospel, that cannot be taken away by the things of this world. For him joy is “something beautiful, capable of filling life with new splendor and profound joy, even in the midst of difficulties.” Who doesn’t yearn for that? I certainly do.

I picked up a beautiful book this week, after listening to the first two weeks of their Advent podcast, Encountering Emmanuel, on the station Abiding Together. Sr. Miriam James Heidland, a woman religious who has deeply impacted my faith life with her story of healing and relationship with Jesus, along with Heather Khym and Michelle Benzinger, discuss a book written by Heather, Encountering Emmanuel: A Guided Advent Journal for Prayer and Meditation. On Monday of the First Week of Advent, Heather, talking about the Gospel of John and the Light of the World discourse, says Jesus “comes crashing through the darkness of night into a world darkened with sin. A star illuminates the way – a star that he breathed into existence and that echoed the truth of who he is, the Light in whom there is no darkness.”

That sentence, and a proclamation that Jesus “wants our whole being to be in the light”, reached the deep core of my being. It was one of those moments where billions of years collapsed into a single second, that stars created by God, illuminating the way for shepherds and wise men thousands of years ago, continues to be a symbol of hope each night as I gaze at stars, that there is a world and truth that no country, politics, or person can wipe away. Even if we destroy the planet with our careless concern for the gift of creation, the stars will shine and remind us that Jesus can and will light the dark places of our lives and the world if we are open to the encounter.

Despite the hardship, despite the turmoil, we look to God who promises us peace, hope, joy and love amidst the darkness of the world. We turn to the Light, to the tender compassion of our God, to “guide our feet into the way of peace” (Luke 1: 78-79, Zechariah’s Canticle, the Benedictus). In that we find true joy.

Wishing you abundant peace and joy this week, Deena

Photo: The Third Week of Advent on our Advent wreath a previous year at my parish.

Advent 2nd Sunday – From darkness to light

On By dpavinatoIn advent, Catholic faith, Every day Catholic, Life in the Spirit, praying for peace, sacred listening, sacred waiting, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, waiting and reflecting1 Comment

Last week our Advent Gospel readings advised us to be attentive, to watch for the signs in nature and to be aware as the world around us changes but not get anxious. I know that in darkness my senses are more attuned to what is going on, I am more sensitive to sounds around me. This week, for the Second Sunday of Advent, we light our second candle and the Christmas narrative begins to unfold for us with the story of John the Baptist as he begins to preach to the people of Israel about the coming Messiah, crying out “prepare the way”. So now we open our ears along with our eyes to reflect on the presence of the Christ in our lives.

One of the most helpful ways for me to pray with Scripture is to use the prayer method of Lectio Divina, or sacred reading. As a Benedictine Oblate we commit to making this a part of our daily prayer. Some days my Lectio is brief and lackluster. Other days the daily readings for morning prayer or daily Mass come alive and speak to me as if it was intended for me personally, an invitation to enter into a conversation with the Divine. This past Wednesday was one of those days and has filled me with hope and peace as I prayed the remainder of this week.

Isaiah 25 says “On this mountain he will destroy the veil that veils all peoples, The web that is woven over all nations…This is the Lord for whom we looked; let us rejoice and be glad that he has saved us!” Isaiah was speaking of the time that the veil will be lifted once and for all and we will see and experience God in fullness.

As I prayed with those verses I reflected that is this is how we encounter the Christ each day, our experience of heaven on earth. Our meditations and our insights, as we read scripture, become our encounter with the Christ and in that the Lord briefly removes the veil for us, we see clearly. Our relationship with the Christ is unburdened and without barriers or restrictions. But we have to open our eyes, ears and hearts to the encounter. Times like this remind me that we don’t need miraculous visions or visits from angels. We just need to create the space, sit in silence and be open to the encounter. I know when I create the time and space for the possibility of encounter like that, I desire it even more.

As we begin the Second Week of Advent, still early in our journey, consider where you might create a space each day to sit and listen to what God might have to say to you. Simply open the daily Mass readings, or a scripture in a daily reflection guide, read the words slowly and listen for the word or phrase that speaks to you. Read it again and let it sink deep into your spirit. Is there a message or insight for you? Does reading it pull at your heart and invite you to simply sit in stillness with God, just resting in God’s presence? Daily encounters with the Divine are not reserved for the Saints or for the mystics and authors that inspire us. They happen in our lives too. I encourage you to use this time of prayer during Advent to open your eyes and ears to the words of Scripture, which are so rich and beautiful during Advent.

Allow this sacred time of encounter to bring Light to the darkness of this world. I am convinced it will not only change your experience of, and relationship with, God but it will change how you relate to the world around you. There are so many things that we cannot change in life and dwelling on that can bring darkness and despair. But we can change how we navigate through them. We can first experience the hope, peace, joy and love of Advent and the Christmas season and then bring these things to those we encounter.

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Photo: The Second Week of Advent candle lit on an Advent wreath from a previous year at our parish.

Advent 1st Sunday – From darkness to light

On By dpavinatoIn advent, Catholic faith, contemplation, Daily Prayer, Every day Catholic, Life in the Spirit, sacred waiting, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, waiting and reflecting2 Comments

Advent is a quiet time of preparing for Christmas. We begin the liturgical season with the dim light of one candle and reflect on the Second Coming of Christ. As we move closer to Christmas we remember the stories from our salvation history and the Incarnation, Jesus’ coming to us in Bethlehem over 2000 years ago. The gospel readings are somber. They warn us to be vigilant. We don’t watch the skies and wring our hands waiting for everything to collapse but we seek to make our hearts more open and prepared. We look within, making sure we aren’t drowsy and distracted by the concerns and desires of this world. We seek to put our focus on God, the peace that comes from living a life of faith, versus the anxieties of each day.

This morning, for the First Sunday of Advent, the prelude to the opening music was a haunting organ version of Veni veni Emmanuel. It was discordant, almost as if someone was playing off key (but we have a digital system, so I knew better). Before it moved to a more harmonious version of that music, O Come O Come Emmanuel, I was reflecting that it was perfect for the beginning of Advent. Our lives, the world for that matter, lack harmony and true fulfillment without the Light that comes from faith. We believe that our lives are changed for the better by living in alignment with the principles that Jesus shared with us, that we encounter daily in the Holy Word.

As we begin our new liturgical year 2025 with the season of Advent, we pause to reflect on our lives and the coming of the Christ Child, remembered at Christmas as the fulfillment of all the promises and covenants of old. But we do so, aware that Christ comes to us each day, if we are open and willing to have the encounter, and that each day we prepare for the time that our days on this earth will end, as well as the Second Coming, at the end of time.

How might we increase our focus on Christ during this holy time of preparation, even in the midst of our busy Christmas decorating, shopping and baking? How might we remind ourselves each day of the real reason we are doing all of these activities? How might we prepare our hearts so that each day they are filled with the Light of Christ, that brings us hope, peace, joy and love.

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Photo: A past Advent wreath at my parish, Holy Family Church.