Category: Sacred Heart of Jesus

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Toolkit for your spirit

On By dpavinatoIn a school of God's service, a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, contemplation, discernment, Every day Catholic, hope and healing, Ignatian prayer, Life in the Spirit, Sacred Heart of Jesus, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual desolation, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Teachers and Guides on the journey, toolkit for the spirit, Trust the journey, waiting and reflectingLeave a comment

Friday evening I was listening to a YouTube recording of a conference talk by Monsignor James Shea of Bismarck, North Dakota. He began his talk sharing an experience he had during a flight delay, hotel layover and then subsequent flight back to North Dakota. To sum up his (humorous) introduction, he was having a bad day! He was honest about his attitude during the various events as they unfolded. While very funny, and a great introduction to the theme of his talk, I have to admit being very surprised. I had this ridiculous notion of this very intelligent and pious man living a life without the many reactions he voiced. The kinds of reactions I experience daily. I was surprised, but also relieved.

We all have those days, or perhaps weeks, when things just aren’t going the way we hoped they would or we find ourselves facing feelings we would rather ignore and stuff down, and away, out of sight and mind. But I am wise enough to know that, in the long run, that isn’t the right approach! We have to walk through those days and, leaning on support when needed, and look at the source of the feelings so that we can move through and beyond them.

Sometimes the light shines through and creates an opening when least expected.

I was reminded of this on Saturday morning by reading “Midmorning Blessing Prayer”, one of my favorites, by Sr. Macrina Wiederkehr (dec’d 2020) from her book, Seven Sacred Pauses. I can’t describe what happened except to say that the clouds parted and hope streamed in.

“What is a blessing but a rain of grace falling generously into the lives of those in need; and who among us is without need?“

Sr. Macrina’s writing has always been that glimmer of hope for me. Why did I forget picking up a favorite book of poems or blessing prayers, these past two weeks? Why didn’t I turn to the things that bring light to dark places? I reflected on those questions and realized I had a couple of answers.

First, in moments of desolation, it’s hard to remember to get up and seek a healing remedy. We don’t have the energy to seek out the very thing that might help us. St. Ignatius of Loyola would call “desolation” those times when we are feeling restless and in a state of dis-ease, when we feel hopeless or discouraged, when we might even sense that God feels far away.

I have been reminded this week, reading Experience Jesus, Really by John Eldredge and his premise that as “Disciples of the Internet” we expect immediate answers. We can Google and find out a solution to anything that might be going on in our lives. It might be true, I can find a supplement or exercise routine to feel better, but what is more likely is that I will participate in endless scrolling to distract myself. We’re “told” that prayer and mystery aren’t necessary (or desired). We also don’t see, or realize, that there is a darkness and evil at work that we need to protect ourselves from. We might not be comfortable calling that darkness “the devil” or a demon. “False spirit” or “enemy” might be easier words to use and grasp. Whatever we call it, it is a real force in the world. It’s a force we need to protect ourselves from. For another blog, but so I don’t leave you wondering, John’s book offers insight on prayer, provides several specific prayers, and suggests that the practice of being an “ordinary mystic” can bring us closer to Jesus and the refuge he offers us in a broken world.

I also reflected back to the three years, and the Ignatian wisdom I learned, while working at Ignatian Ministries. Becky’s (the founder) class series Going Past the Shallows, (GPTS) on the Ignatian Rules of Discernment, gave me a lot of insight on desolation and the false spirit, how to recognize and deal with times of desolation, and the concept of Agere Contra, meaning to fight against. (A new version of the first in the GPTS series, Ignatian Prayer Methods, is being offered this Fall.)

My pondering of my “stuckness” and desolation of the past two weeks reminded me that I need to have some things at the ready during times like this, a Toolkit so to speak, that I can turn to. All of the things I will mention were right here, alongside me, but I didn’t think to turn to them. Perhaps a list would have helped. Imagine having a list in preparation for a vacation, or young expectant parents anticipating the sudden trip to the hospital, the list makes sure we don’t forget the essential things we need to have with us.

  • Reading Sr. Macrina’s, or a variety of other authors that inspire and lift me up, with a cup of tea in a quiet spot.
  • Turning to a special prayer, like the St. Michael the Archangel prayer, or Litany to the Sacred Heart of Jesus, the Divine Mercy Chaplet or a favorite mystery of the Rosary.
  • Contemplating a prayer card, a favorite image of Jesus, Mary or the saints.
  • Knowing who we can turn to, a trusted friend or spiritual guide to walk with during the difficult times.
  • Setting aside times of prayer for daily Mass or Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament.
  • Using a journal for writing, drawing or expressing yourself in some way.

What would be on your list? What do you turn to in times of need? How might they help you and how might you turn to them more quickly in the future when feeling the world weighing heavy upon you?

Wishing you abundant peace and hope, Deena

Image: My photo in the prayer chapel of Benet House, the retreat house at St Mary’s Monastery in Rock Island, where I am a Benedictine Oblate.

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Clearing the distractions

On By dpavinatoIn Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, contemplation, Daily Prayer, Every day Catholic, Lenten journey, Life in the Spirit, Poverty of Spirit, Sacred Heart of Jesus, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, UncategorizedLeave a comment

A couple of weeks ago I read the blog by Catherine Smith, in her Hem of the Light email entitled “Sometimes to tell is to transfigure”, in which she said, “Peter came to the mountain with an old story.  It wasn’t a bad story.  It just didn’t quite fit.  It constricted his sight.  He looked at it without being able to look through it.” The Gospel of Luke, that we read this weekend, for the Transfiguration, says that Peter seeing Jesus’ glory wants to build three tents for Jesus, Moses and Elijah. It then says “But he did not know what he was saying”. Jesus wanted Peter, James and John to get a glimpse of his glory so that they were readied for the difficult times ahead, witnessing his arrest and crucifixion. Peter wanted to move into action versus simply being present to the unity of Jesus and his Father, a glimpse of heaven.

Our old stories can get in the way of what God wants to reveal as possible to us. We say “it’s too late”, “I’m too old”, “I’m not smart enough”, or maybe as we move further in Lent “it’s too hard, what difference does this make anyway (i.e., “this” being the thing I am trying to do more of or have “given up”)? All of these can be temptations by the false spirit to move you further away from experiencing Jesus and growing closer to him in silence and prayer and discovering more about the fullness of life with him. We are tempted to think that the restoration and wholeness we seek during Lent isn’t possible. We might be seduced into believing that we can’t come out the other side of Lent as a different person.

In February, during his reflection on the Transfiguration mystery, on the Rosary in a Year podcast, Fr. Mark Mary used an analogy that captured my attention. He said that if you stand in Times Square in New York at night, you only see the lights, you can’t see the dark sky. The lights blind us to the reality of night above all the lights. With this analogy in mind, the lights of the world make it hard to see the beauty and brilliance of Jesus’ glory, unless we step away, reduce the distractions, so that we can see what’s really beautiful and get a glimpse of that which we have been created for. The other morning, as I went outside to watch the lunar eclipse, I was grateful for the clear skies and darkness of the night sky so that I could experience this wonder in the celestial dome. I couldn’t see the eclipse from inside my house, I had to step out and away, I had to look up to experience it.

Jesus wants us to experience wholeness and healing in our hearts and in our lives. If you haven’t started yet, or have been tempted to give up already, what might you let go of during these remaining weeks of Lent to make more room for an encounter with Christ? Are there some distractions that you can clear away to make space to listen more carefully?

This time of Lent has been revealing to me the impact of distractions and noise on my prayer life and, honestly, my stress level. I pray for the grace to continue with the same level of discipline so that I continue to be transformed during these forty days.

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Image: Starved Rock State Park on a March day, several years ago, similar to today with fresh snowfall.

Note: It’s not too late to register for my Lent Evening of Reflection, Make My Heart Like Your Heart, this Thursday, March 20 at 6:30 p.m. The suggested donation is $19 and all proceeds will be sent to Catholic Relief Services and the Rice Bowl project. I am not a non-profit so please be sure to mark donation to Catholic Relief Services on your check so that you have a record of your donation for your taxes. You can contact me in the comments, or on social media, if you would like to attend and receive a Zoom link for the event, as well as the address to mail the check. It will be a time of prayer and reflection, as well as sharing, on three scripture passages reflecting on ways that we might have a heart more like that of Christ.

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A revolutionary vision

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, a season of hope, Art and new vision, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, contemplation, Daily Prayer, Jubilee Year of Hope, Sacred Heart of Jesus, Sacred Heart of Jesus, spiritual healing, sacred listening, sacred seeing, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Teachers and Guides on the journeyLeave a comment

Lately the range of emotions I experience each day feel as though I am riding a roller coaster. I might note, I am not a fan of roller coasters! I try to ignore the news and take deep breaths but it can be overwhelming. I stopped watching the news (preferring to read updates by well versed political historians and fact-finders) but still come across posts with quotes by our leaders, elected or not, that are filled with such hate, delusion and self supremacy that I feel like giving up completely. But I know it is not the time to give in or to be silent. I also know that the people and things of this world are not the things that really matter, they are not my ultimate purpose or goal. My stability and sanity come from trying to balance each day with things that bring some relief, some joy, some hope. Thankfully there are an abundance of uplifting and life-giving posts, essays, articles and events that help me counter the negativity and vitriol.

As my thoughts for writing this post jumbled around all week, I thought of sharing an experience I had a couple of weekends ago, attending a fireside poetry reading by Scottish poet Kenneth Steven, hosted by friend Pat Leyko Connelly, also a published poet. He read from his book, Atoms of Delight: Ten Pilgrimages in Nature. I won’t share more details of the event as my friend Judith Valente, does so eloquently this morning, in her blog, along with other thoughtful reflections on finding wonder during these turbulent times. But, a significant moment during the event came for me as Kenneth Steven read a story of one of the significant “atoms of delight” in his life, being the first to gather the freshly fallen chestnuts from a tree in the early dawn. I recalled one of my own “atoms”. I spent some of my grade school years living in a small town in the area of the Catskill Mountains in New York. In a wooded area behind our home there was a huge rock (likely only 5 feet but in my memory it was massive) and giant pine trees. We would venture in the freshly fallen snow, shake the tree branches on each other and play on and around the rock. It was my own personal energy portal. Nature was alive and filled me with joy and wonder, an “atom of delight”.

In a personal post on social media this weekend I shared an article entitled “A Spell Against Stagnation”, a reflection on the writings of John O’Donohue, another poet that lifts my heart and spirit, on a site called The Marginalian (link to website but you can find on Facebook). Founder Maria Popova shares articles with endless links and spirals of creativity and nourishment. Statements from Maria, like “Kneeling to look at a lichen is a devotional act”, remind me to stop and look for those moments of wonder. I appreciate the beauty and sensitivity of her artwork, bird divinations, from An Almanac of Birds: Divinations for Uncertain Days which you can find on her website or Facebook page (and soon available in a card deck as a pre-order on Amazon).

Another simple practice that I implement each day as part of morning and/or evening prayer is a gratitude or wonder list. In a blog or article by writer and retreat facilitator, Mary DeTurris Poust, I was intrigued by a different approach to my daily list. Mary shared that she numbers her three daily posts in an ongoing list, which was now in the thousands. I began mine at the time of the reading and as of this morning have reached 215. This list is part of my daily Examen (a practice of reflecting on the graces, consolations and desolations of each day) journal. It helps me look for those moments of wonder, those small “atoms of delight” in each day.

Today a homily written by Pope Francis, read by Cardinal Jose Tolentino de Mendoza, challenged artists [poets, writers, visual artists…] to be “witnesses of the revolutionary vision of the Beatitudes”. The Pope said that living the Beatitudes and expressing them in art [and I would add the expression of our lives] was a way to reveal “ truth and goodness …hidden within the folds of history”, and “giving voice to the voiceless”. “‘Artists have the task, the Pope said, of “helping humanity not to lose its way’”. (Vatican News, February 16, 2025)

If you seek solace these days I encourage you to read poetry, listen to music or reflect on art. Visit some of the writers or poets I mention today or find others that inspire you to look at life differently. If you write, continue to do so. If you draw, paint or create mixed media journals, keep going. If you have longed to pick up and learn to play a musical instrument, it’s not too late. Do it for you, not to change the world at large, but to change yours. Find joy and express it. It just might make each day a bit more lovely!

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Another note: I mentioned offering a Lent Night of Reflection a couple of weeks ago. I am still working on a webpage and more sophisticated registration process, but that all takes time. I decided to move forward anyway. The mini retreat will be “Make My Heart Like Your Heart: Encounter and Change of Heart” on Thursday, March 20 from 6:30 – 8:30 p.m. Central Time. The suggested donation for the event is $19. I will keep working on a registration process but it might be as simple as a PayPal or Venmo payment for my first event. During the event we will reflect on the things in the world that consume our heart and attention, our need and desire to give and receive forgiveness, and ways that we can pour out our love to God in a personal and sincere way. I am excited to offer this and I hope you will be able to join me. For now, you can email me, private message me or add a comment to this post on my website adding “Retreat” to the beginning of your comment and I won’t approve (or will hide) that comment to be shown on the website.

Photo: A print of Bernini’s “The Ecstacy of St. Teresa of Avila” that hangs in my office.

All glory, praise and honor

On By dpavinatoIn Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Every day Catholic, Life in the Spirit, Sacred Heart of Jesus, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Saints as Models & Guides, Spiritual Journey, spirituality1 Comment

Today is the Solemnity of Jesus Christ, the King of the Universe. We end the liturgical year on this Sunday and will begin the Liturgical Year 2025 next week, with the First Sunday of Advent.

We don’t have any experience in the United States but we have watched more well-known monarchs, such as Queen Elizabeth II and King Charles III of the United Kingdom. Along with royal duties and governing of the countries for which they are responsible, we learn about the causes important to them, such as King Charles’ concern for the environment and sustainability. As we look at current and past history, we see the differences in leaders who care for their country and the people they serve, as opposed to those who seek power and control, regardless of the cost of human lives or property.

How then, do we approach this important day, and final Sunday, in the church calendar? What impact does it, or should it have, on our lives?

“This message of mine is for you, then, if you are ready to give up your own will, once and for all, and armed with the strong and noble weapons of obedience to do battle for Jesus, the Christ.” The Prologue of the Rule of St. Benedict

I don’t know that I completely understood the meaning of these words from the Rule when I became an Oblate twenty years ago. I had a better understanding of what I was being asked to take on versus what I was being asked to surrender in life. As is true in life, our spiritual insight grows with time too. I desired a life of prayer for the monastery and for the world. I desired community with the Sisters of St. Benedict, St. Mary Monastery and with other oblates in our community or the world-wide Oblate community. I desired to grow in my spiritual life and saw living the life of an Oblate as a way to help me on that path.

While the charism of the Franciscans, Carmelites, Dominicans and Jesuits were (and are) close to my heart, and way of viewing the world spiritually, the Benedictine monastic influence spoke most strongly to my heart and way of living in the world. To use another phrase from an online community that is important to me, I wanted to be a “monk in the world“. I considered entering the Benedictine community as a religious, but the idea of being obedient to a prioress and a specific community wasn’t something I was willing to commit to.

Over time, most especially this past year, I have grown in my understanding of what service to the King really means. I have, and am, evaluating the things that I give my mind and attention, my time, and my resources to. I didn’t want to promise obedience to a prioress in a religious community but was I also avoiding my commitment and fidelity to Christ the King?

If I look at choices over the past 25 years, most weren’t bad choices (sadly there were times!) but they were based on wants vs. desires or needs. I try to live in a way that is representative of calling myself a Catholic Christian, or being a member of my parish community and an Oblate of a Benedictine community. But I was searching. I was looking for ways that those activities, or ways of being in the world, would help me spiritually and would fill me up. My desire lately has shifted to how my participation in life brings me closer in my relationship with God and helps me understand the gifts and talents I have so that they may be used in service of God and others. It’s a subtle difference but a dramatic one.

I was looking to grow spiritually because of how it made me feel versus how it prepares me to live a life with God forever. That doesn’t mean that we have to ignore desires and dreams for this life. I have learned that God desires those for us too. But as we look at all the gifts we have in life, which were given to us freely and as a way to know God better, we consider them and respond to God out of love and thanksgiving for them.

The Thanksgiving holiday this week gives us the perfect opportunity to look at our lives, the many ways we have been blessed, and offer thanks to God. As you reflect on all you have to be grateful for this year, I invite you to consider how you can use those gifts in service of God. How might you bring more light to a dark world? How can you bring hope in a time of despair? How might you offer resources or service to those in need? Are there small changes you can make that reflect a concern for our planet, to be a good steward of the Earth? Take this week, as an extended New Year’s Eve of the liturgical year, and contemplate whether your choices each day reflect your priorities in life. What King do you serve?

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Photo: Artwork I purchased from the National Eucharistic Congress. “Christ the King, the Sacred Heart”, created by Ruth A Stricklin of New Jerusalem Studios.

Make my heart like your heart

On By dpavinatoIn Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Every day Catholic, Sacred Heart of Jesus, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spiritualityLeave a comment

Early this morning there was a beautiful frost on the ground. It wasn’t the first frost of the Fall but the scene stopped me and invited me pause and reflect on its beauty. As I sat to journal and do my Examen from Saturday, I watched the sun begin to grow higher and brighter in the sky, which then resulted in a slow and steady line of frost that was being melted by the sun. The patch of frost remaining, grew smaller and smaller. Eventually it was gone.

I thought about the human heart, the wounds we all hold and carry with us. The times we have been hurt and the times we have hurt others. Healing is a journey. It doesn’t happen overnight and I have learned I can’t do it on my own. In our human frailty, it’s not possible. We need the Love that always loves, always forgives, always desires what is best for us.

This past summer I developed a new interest and fondness to the devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus. As a Catholic I have grown up aware of the devotion but it’s never been a regular part of my prayer life. But I was praying for answers, for clarity and direction. Entering into prayer each day, using a novena prayer, I began a process of sharing all that was on my heart with Jesus. Then things got hard again and I stopped. (You can insert the game show buzzer at this point, “wrong answer!”)

When I learned that Pope Francis had written a new encyclical on the Sacred Heart of Jesus, I was excited, as if waiting for a gift on Christmas. I set my alarm this past Thursday, woke up early to visit Vatican News, and begin reading the encyclical, Dilexit Nos, a Latin expression that means “He has loved us”. I have had the time and space to spend more time reading it, and reflecting on the deep wisdom, this weekend. I already have my digital version marked up with favorite quotes and insights to ponder. It’s a beautiful treatise on the human and divine love of Jesus expressed through his Sacred Heart.

I have returned to one of the thoughts shared in the encyclical several times since reading it. Pope Francis says “If we devalue the heart, we also devalue what it means to speak from the heart, to act with the heart, to cultivate and heal the heart. If we fail to appreciate the specificity of the heart, we miss the messages that the mind alone cannot communicate; we miss out on the richness of our encounters with others; we miss out on poetry. We also lose track of history and our own past, since our real personal history is built with the heart. At the end of our lives, that alone will matter.” Later in that section, he says, “It could be said, then, that I am my heart, for my heart is what sets me apart, shapes my spiritual identity and puts me in communion with other people.”

My heart is what sets me apart.

Three times in his gospel, Luke writes that “Mary kept all these things, reflecting on them in her heart.” Over the past month or so, the idea of allowing myself to explore the deep desires and wounds in my heart has become stronger. I have begun to see an integral connection between my studies in counseling and the spiritual life. I want to dig in and study more about this relationship. I have heard Sr. Miriam James Heidland, SOLT, speak of this level of healing in many of her talks. She has said that “The past is the past unless it’s being lived out in the present”. We think we can mask the wounds and say “it doesn’t matter” or if we manage it well enough no one will notice, but can we? She speaks eloquently about the reasons for our behavior, that we are doing what we are doing because our hearts have been broken. We allow things to come out, in healing therapy or spiritual direction, so that we can heal them.

The best gift we can give ourselves is to take those wounds or concerns and bring them, open handed, and give them over to the wounded heart of Jesus who knows all the same hurts, betrayals, abandonment that we experience. But the difference is that Jesus is centered in love and his relationship with the Father. He will not judge, he will not condemn, he will only offer love and an invitation to come closer. “The heart of Jesus is ‘the natural sign and symbol of his boundless love.'”

The more we grow in trust of that Love, the more we are able to offer that love to others.

Jesus, meek and humble of heart, make my heart like your own.

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Photo: A stained glass window of the Sacred Heart, St Scholastica and St. Gertrude at St. Scholastica Monastery in Fort Smith, Arkansas

Link to Dilexit Nos: https://www.vaticannews.va/en/pope/news/2024-10/he-loved-us-the-pope-s-encyclical-on-the-sacred-heart.html