Category: Fruit of the Spirit

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A season of change

On By dpavinatoIn a season of hope, anxiety & depression, Catholic faith, contemplation, discernment, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, hope and healing, mental wellbeing, Rest for the weary, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, season of change, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, surrender, Trust the journeyLeave a comment

Saturday morning I was motivated to get moving early and left for the gym by 7 a.m. While driving I saw a flock of geese flying from a body of water to their morning destination. I smiled wide and wished that I had been parked somewhere to hear their loud and noisy morning conversation, likely discussing the best field to descend upon. Seeing them in their large wedge reminded me that fall is on the way.

The past few days have been glorious with the arrival of cooler temperatures; chilly mornings, lovely sunlight days and crisp evenings. I have even seen a few orange leaves on trees as well as the subtle hint of change to come in the green leaves still lush on the trees. I am ready for more days like this and all of that change. It is absolutely my favorite season.

To be cliche, Autumn reminds us that change can be beautiful.

However, we can fear, resist and even struggle with change, whether it is internal and emotional or external and situational. That fear, resistance or struggle can bring on feelings of depression or anxiety. I’ve been battling with this for the past month or so. Things are getting better, but I want to share some thoughts and ideas over the next couple of blog posts in the event that you struggle with this at times. We all have a “bad day” now and then, but more serious, or clinical, depression is when it lasts for a longer period of time, such as a couple of weeks.

I saw an insightful post this weekend on happiness, Mental Health in America and Suicide Prevention Month. It reported that over 800,000 people die by suicide each year, one death every 40 seconds. They suggested that we destigmatize mental health and let others know that talking about mental health is not attention seeking. People die in silence every day due to the judgments of others. I know, for myself, it’s easier to hide behind “I’m fine” when asked how we are doing. In a world in which we are so constantly connected and “talking” to others, it is amazing that we can feel so alone and isolated. In 2024 a Gallup survey reported that 30% of adults experience weekly loneliness with single adults being more greatly impacted and young adults (15-24) feeling lonelier than any other age group. Yet, seeing any group of young people at a table or gathering, chances are you will see them with heads in their phones, staying “connected”.

I have been utilizing a variety of tools and resources to help deal with the feelings I have been having. Things like talking to my doctor, meeting with a counselor, seeking spiritual guidance, spending time in prayer and meditation, reading books and poetry, taking supplements to help with mood and relaxation, and exploring a variety of creative projects have all provided some assistance. Friends that are able to listen and provide genuine care and compassion are essential so seek them out and let them know how you have been feeling. Go slow and make sure you are sharing with a friend that will truly hear you so that you don’t feel worse after opening your heart. It isn’t the words that they say in response, but the care you feel that will make the difference. However, if you feel alone and that no one will understand, please know that there are places to turn. Reach out to your pastor/priest, deacon, or other resources in your communities of faith, such as a spiritual director or faith companion, or by exploring mental health resources in your community. I also hope that some of the ideas that I will share in upcoming blogs will be of some assistance.

In addition to any of those resources, we have to be willing to look at things in a new way and to be open to the grace that comes to us as we pray for change. Friday’s Gospel reading of the day, from Luke chapter 5, regarding the old and new wine skins is a great reminder. We need new wineskins for new wine. Jesus says new wine in old wineskins will cause them to break. He also says that the person that has been drinking the old wine doesn’t want the new wine, saying that the old wine is good enough. Change is hard. It’s risky. We have to put on new ways of seeing, thinking and being. If we just consider the struggle, we won’t want to change. But if we look for the opportunities, we just might see the situation in a new way.

I was reminded of the Autumn – Season of Surrender section of the book, The Circle of Life; The Heart’s Journey Through the Seasons, by Joyce Rupp and Macrina Wiederkehr. In one of the chapters in that section, Joyce Rupp writes “If you look at a sunset, you might see only the disappearance of daylight. If you look beneath, you may see darkness opening the splendor of stars… If you look at lost dreams, you might see only disappointment and doubt. If you look beneath, you may see the stuff that new dreams contain… If you look at yourself, you might see only tarnished unfinishedness. If you look beneath, you may see your basic goodness shining there.”

Let’s be willing to “look beneath”.

Today I conclude with a few lines from a favorite Mary Oliver poem, Wild Geese:

Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting–
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

Wishing you abundant hope, peace and the assurance of knowing you have a place in this world and that you are not alone, Deena

Photo: Tree colors from my visit to Anderson Gardens in Rockford last fall.

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Before the bloom

On By dpavinatoIn A life worth living, a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, Gifts of the Spirit, hope and healing, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, nurturing growth, Our unique call, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Trust the journey, waiting and reflecting3 Comments

This week I happened upon an article about pruning lantana plants. I have a few plants in pots and didn’t realize to get the most proficient blooms that it is best to prune them when the weather is hot and sunny, then as things begin to cool down you stop pruning. So, I will have to see, with warm days still in the forecast, if I can revive them a bit.

As a result I began reflecting on my Savannah Grass blooms. It’s a lovely grass that my friend Kathy introduced me to three or four years ago. I learned after the first year, one plant in front of the house and one on the patio in back, that they prefer a longer day of sunlight. So the past couple of years, and this, I have had two plants on the patio that has a full day of sun exposure. They produce a lovely, delicate, pink plume that gently sways in the breeze like the one we have this Sunday morning. The cats actually love a piece of the grass each morning, they sit and wait for me, not so patiently, to find the perfect blade for them. As you see in the blog photo for today, one of my plants has produced the anticipated blooms but one has not.

I began reflecting on why one plant produced plumes and the other didn’t. I water them at the same time and the same amount. I feed them on the same days. They are only seven feet apart and get the same amount of sunlight. Then I remembered that after buying the plants, both started from seed at the same nursery, that I repotted one in a larger ceramic pot with new potting soil, and the other I left in the large container from the nursery and just dropped it inside a very tall ceramic pot. The first year I bought that particular pot I filled it with soil (a lot of soil!) which made it difficult to move. The next year I emptied it, filled with bricks so that my Savannah grass can sit nicely on top the bricks inside the pot and cascade over the sides. The difference it seems is the soil that I planted, or did not plant, each of the grasses in.

As I reflected on my plant situation I recalled a recent Gospel reading, Matthew 13: 24-30, regarding the Kingdom of heaven being likened to a man who sowed good seed in his field. While I don’t have any weeds, like the parable, my plant didn’t produce the desired blooms.

If you aren’t seeing the desired “blooms” in your life, or desired fruit, using another Gospel and garden analogy, I invite you to reflect with me on the following questions. I would like to continue with my garden metaphor and ponder whether I have been seeing the fruits of the Spirit such as love, joy, peace, gentleness, patience, etc.

Has your “soil” been properly prepared so that you are seeing these fruits? If not, or if in some way someone or something was detrimental to that growth, what can you do to amend the soil? Are you watering your plants each day with prayerful reflection? Are you nourishing the soil with the support of a faith community? Are you watching for “weeds” or other harmful influences, that might choke growth and inspired living? Are you monitoring your growth or just hoping for the best?

As we enjoy these final weeks of summer, I hope you will use the opportunity to look at your flowers or gardens as an inspiration for your life, supporting and sustaining each day just as we would our precious plants.

Wishing you abundant peace and hope, Deena

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Pulling out all the stops

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, A life worth living, a school of God's service, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, Daily Prayer, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, Gifts of the Spirit, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Trust the journeyLeave a comment

Last week I mentioned that I enjoy watching YouTube videos for entertainment, instruction and reflection. I shared that I enjoy watching Paul Fey and his playing the great organs around the world. If you use technology you know that the algorithms see what you watch and then show more of that type of content to your feed in the way of posts or ads. Sometimes it’s helpful and sometimes it is just plain annoying.

The other night I opened YouTube to watch a video and saw an organ short titled “Pulling out all the stops”. I laughed out loud, not realizing the source of that idiom. I watched as the organist pulled out all the knobs on the side of the organ and how the sound of the organ changed and amplified.

My post photo today is our organ at Holy Family Church. You will see the stops on the side, we have about 30 or so stop knobs on our beautiful organ. On the large organ at Holy Name Cathedral in Chicago, built by Flentrop Orgelbouw, (image from my recent visit to Holy Name pasted at the bottom of this blog) there are 71 stops and 5,558 pipes. The stops are the primary way that an organist controls and shapes the sound that is produced by the organ. They produce the pitch and tone of the sound and allows the air to flow through the pipes on the organ.

The use of the phrase, “pulling out all the stops”, suggests that we are going to do everything in our power to make something happen or to succeed. I paused to think about this with regard to our faith life. What if we pulled out all the stops in our daily prayer and living of the Gospel message? What if I lived “full out” in my belief that I am a beloved daughter of the Father and a disciple and friend of Christ? Am I living my life in a world of “just okay” when God has something greater in store for me and my life? To use the organ analogy, by pulling out all the stops, can I get the loudest, fullest, deepest expression of what I am meant to be in life?

The Gospel message this weekend for the Seventeenth Sunday in Ordinary time encourages us in persistent prayer. Jesus, in Luke’s version, assures us to be confident in our prayer, to be bold and persistent. In our Old Testament reading, Abraham is bold in convincing God to spare Sodom if there are at least 10 faithful individuals who remain in the city destined for destruction. Jesus guides us to approach God, as our loving Father, confident and trusting.

That’s what I want in my faith life! Deep, rich, vibrant spirituality lived with passion and confident trust that God knows all I need and desire to live my best life giving glory to him! Are you living in a world of “just okay” or are you willing to place your trust in God and pull out all the stops in living that faith?

Wishing you abundant peace, trust, and hope this week, Deena

The organ at Holy Name Cathedral from the nave, or main seating area, of the Cathedral.

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A spirit of renewal

On By dpavinatoIn a season of hope, An example of faith and hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, Pope Francis, Pope Leo XIV, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, season of change, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, synodalityLeave a comment

Later this summer, God willing, I will celebrate another birthday. I was reflecting early this morning on the ways I have changed this year. Yet in all the little, or even big changes, this past year I remain the same person with the same guiding values and principles in life. I dream new dreams, set goals and aspire to new things but remain the same in essence – a woman, daughter, sister, aunt, who is compassionate, values integrity and authenticity, seeks peace, desires to serve God in the best way that I can given the gifts I have. Those fundamental characteristics of who I am do not change regardless of the other evolutionary shifts on my journey through life.

Pentecost, celebrated in the Church today on June 8, fifty days after Easter, is recognized as the birth of the Church. The Spirit descended on Mary, the Apostles and other disciples and ignites them with a desire and passion to carry on the mission of Jesus, witnessing the love of the Christ to all those they encounter and spreading that message of peace. The power of the Spirit descended on them but it continues in the world, throughout time, since that first Pentecost and even today! Yet, even contemplating all of the changes in the Church in the past 2000+ years, the guiding principles of Jesus and the fundamental Christian truths, remain the same, despite culture, age, or specific social or ecclesial situation.

As I reflected upon this past year in my life, I also pondered the changes this past year in the Church. Most recently, of course, for Catholics was the passing of Pope Francis and the election of Pope Leo XIV. There were also numerous meetings of the Synod on Synodality in 2024, with the Second Session ending in October 2024 marking the end of the discernment phase. Beginning in 2021, Pope Francis asked the Church, laity, religious and ordained ministers of the Church, to reflect on themes of communion, participation and mission. The preparatory documents said that the purpose of the Synod was not to “produce documents, but to plant dreams, draw forth prophecies and visions, allow hope to flourish, inspire trust, bind up wounds, weave together relationships, awaken a dawn of hope, learn from one another and create a bright resourcefulness that will enlighten minds, warm hearts, give strength to our hands.”

Earlier this week I listened to a Liturgical Press webinar with Cardinal Timothy Radcliffe, member of the Dominican Community at Blackfriars, Oxford, on “Synodal Hope, The Vision of Pope Francis and the Future with Pope Leo.” He is a strong advocate for the Synod process and has been involved in the Synod by offering spiritual reflections at various meetings and retreats for those involved in the Synod gatherings. He offered hope (a theme discussed in his new book, Surprised by Hope; Further Meditations on Synodality published by Liturgical Press) in the process, regardless of how we feel about our place in the Church, acknowledging that many feel they are on the margins or whose full dignity in role and mission has not been recognized.

Cardinal Radcliffe said the Synod isn’t about subverting authority or hierarchy, that it isn’t about decisions, but rather, quoting Pope Benedict XVI, saying that it is about “encounter”. Being Catholic is about opening our being to everything and everyone, reaching out with stretched open arms. He said that it is about daring to get together to share hopes and dreams, “Being Church, being Christian, being alive in God”, and dropping barriers.

Pope Leo XIV, at the Pentecost Vigil and this Sunday morning, at the Mass of Pentecost, said that the Holy Spirit comes to “breaks down our hardness of heart, our narrowness of mind, our selfishness, the fears that enchain us and the narcissism that makes us think only of ourselves.” The Holy Spirit challenges us to open borders, first within our hearts and then in our relationships with others. Pentecost he said, “renews the Church, renews the world”.

During the Pentecost Vigil, Pope Leo said that synodality is rooted in the Trinity and where the Spirit is, “there is movement, a journey to be made.” He offered encouragement to say that, in this Jubilee Spirit, we walk together in unity, no longer for ourselves but walking alongside each other. Synodality demands that we recognize the poverty and richness in everyone, that we realize we are part of a greater whole.

I was inspired as Pope Leo said that this great mission of the work of God is something we all participate in, we take part in our parishes and our communities, using the charisms we have been given, working as one, the future then becomes less dark, discernment less complicated.

On this great Solemnity of the Church, I have hope. I have hope that we trust the Spirit to guide us on our individual paths and in the ways we can make a difference in the world. I have hope that the Church will seek to draw people together, to listen and encounter versus separate. I have hope, that the Jubilee message of Hope, as it now continues to be shared by Pope Leo, will have a far reaching impact to create peace in the world, to break down barriers and open hearts.

Come Holy Spirit, Come!

Wishing you abundant peace and Hope this week, Deena

Image: Our Pentecost window at Holy Family Church.

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Trust the journey

On By dpavinatoIn a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, contemplation, Daily Prayer, discernment, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, hope and healing, Ignatian prayer, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, Madonna della Strada, Our Lady of the Way, Personal call and vocation, Pope Leo XIV, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, Saints as Models & Guides, season of change, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, spiritual healing, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, The Spiritual Exercises, Trust the journeyLeave a comment

I recall the words of one of my wellness teachers in Michigan as I prepared to leave corporate life in the late 1980’s and move back to Illinois to open a business. He said, paraphrasing a bit, teach what you want keep practicing or what you want to learn. Many of us that write or teach do just that. It’s often a thought we want to explore more, go deeper with, or remember about our journeys. That is very true with today’s post!

The past couple of days have been challenging ones. I was doubting and wondering what lies ahead for me. It’s part of the reason that the past couple of blogs have been about listening to an inner call and watching for guidance from Spirit. But more specifically this week, I have been contemplating a way to present a concept about personal call and vocation in life, a Christ-centered approach to looking at the different aspects of our lives and making sense of how we decide what to focus on, the activities we pursue and how they fit in our mission in life. As soon as I put thoughts together, my inner critic would chime in and say “who cares”, “why bother”, “no one needs to know this” or worse, “no one wants to know this”. I got discouraged and depressed.

So Friday, I bought some plants! Dirt therapy is revitalizing! I have hope when I plant and watch my flowers grow and blossom. As I was finishing up outside Saturday morning, I was surprised by a visit from a good friend, Cheryl, who lives out of town, but was in the area to visit the cemetery and another friend. She dropped off an adorable cat, coffee mug, knowing coffee and cats are two of my favorite things. I was touched by the gift and the surprise visit! A few minutes later, another friend, Kelly, texted that she wanted to stop by and drop off a treat. It was an amazing chocolate expresso cupcake from a local bakery, Millstone, which I thoroughly enjoyed Saturday evening! Those brief encounters reminded me that no matter what else is going on, I have loving and cherished friends and have that to be grateful for.

Saturday evening I sat down to catch up on social media and saw a post by the Jesuits of Canada and the United States on Facebook honoring the Feast of Our Lady of the Way, Madonna della Strada, on May 24. I paused and gave thanks for the reminder to trust Divine Timing.

The fresco of Our Lady of the Way is displayed at the Church of the Gesu in Rome, Italy. There is also a replica of the painting in the Madonna della Strada Chapel on the campus of Loyola University in Chicago. St. Ignatius of Loyola, founder of the Jesuits, had a deep love for our Lady. Our Lady of Arantzazu and Our Lady of Montserrat Shrines were significant in his personal journey, and the formation of what we now call the Spiritual Exercises and Ignatian Spirituality. St. Ignatius, and later his companions, the early Jesuits, formed and made solemn vows on Marian feast days.

Our Lady of the Way is special to me because she led me to my spiritual director and praying the Spiritual Exercises this past year. Last Spring, when I worked for Ignatian Ministries, I had been talking to Becky Eldredge about the Spiritual Exercises. I knew I didn’t want to walk through the Exercises with anyone that was on our referral list or directors that Becky knew. I wanted it to be with someone that didn’t know me or my work at the ministry. I browsed many Ignatian and Jesuit retreat sites and the minute I found Our Lady of the Way (see info and link below), I knew it was the right retreat center for me. I waited a couple of months, but once I felt that the calling was intensifying within, I browsed the spiritual directors and emailed one of the founders. Besides being trained to walk with people through the Spiritual Exercises, she was trained in Mind-Body, Integrative Healing and Cognitive Behavior Therapy. I just knew she was the right fit! We talked and it was! It’s been a grace-filled year.

This morning, Sunday, May 25, Pope Leo XIV reminded us in his Regina Caeli address that “in all that the Lord calls us to—whether in our life journey or in our journey of faith, sometimes we feel inadequate.” He said that Jesus sends us the Spirit so that we don’t have to worry or be anxious in life in our individual calling or regarding personal responsibilities. Pope Leo, who also has a deep love of Our Lady, said that we too, like Mary, can welcome the Spirit, so that we can be “signs and instruments of his love” to those we encounter. Those words give me hope. I pray that they are an encouragement to you too. Let us watch for the signs that God is with us and that we have the Spirit to guide and encourage us as we attempt to respond to that personal call in each of our lives.

I wish you abundant peace and hope, Deena

Our Lady of the Way, stay with us when we grow weary of the journey…Lead us when we cannot see the path…Because for all we lay down, we pick up something greater, we pick up freedom. Our Lady of the Way, show us the way. (Full prayer on Jesuits.org)

My spiritual director, and her colleagues, have a lovely description of the history and dedication of Madonna della Strada, as well as their retreats and information regarding spiritual direction, on their website, Our Lady of the Way. The Blog section has an abundance of articles on prayer and Ignatian Spirituality, I encourage you to visit it!

Image for today’s blog: the icon of Madonna della Stada at the Church of the Gesu, Rome.

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The paths we choose

On By dpavinatoIn a life of joy, A life worth living, Answering the great question, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, contemplation, Daily Prayer, discernment, Doing what we love, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, Pope Leo XIV, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, surrender, waiting and reflecting2 Comments

This past Friday evening, the final 8th grade class of Holy Family School (HFS), our parish Catholic grade school, graduated. I mentioned two weeks ago in my blog that our three local Catholic grade schools are merging and becoming one new school, The Carlo Acutis Academy, beginning in the Fall of 2025. As I looked at pictures shared by the family members of the graduates, as well as friends with grandchildren graduating high school this past week, I find myself a bit sentimental thinking about all of the moments from my first day of kindergarten at Holy Family School and the years that followed. The post image I am sharing this week is our “Oglesby Girls” group (we still gather for lunch and other special events, friends for all these years!), and other classmates who were able to join us, for a final photo with the school name on the building before it changes. We were the first class of HFS that studied Kindergarten through Eighth Grade in the school building.

This week I also participated in a couple of workshops or seminars that helped me to continue to reflect on my topic last week on personal vocation and our call in life. Today, Sunday, May 18, was Pope Leo XIV’s Inaugural Mass of the Petrine Ministry (yes, I woke up at 2:30 a.m. for it!). I listened as commentators muses on his background and priestly and missionary calling that led to his role as Pope and Shepherd of the Catholic Church. He seems perfect, has all of the right qualifications but more importantly the pastoral heart that the world needs right now. Will he make mistakes or do something that will result in questions or criticism? Of course, he is human. But at the moment, I am enjoying the honeymoon period of learning more about him and all the work he has done leading up his selection as Pope just a short 11 days ago. The paths he chose in life gave him the necessary background, along with the working of the Holy Spirit, to bring him to this momentous day.

Before sitting down to write this, I read Maria Shriver’s weekly post, Keep Room In Your Heart for The Unimaginable, regarding her unexpected trip to Rome for the Inaugural Mass and her thoughts on the “yeses” we say in life and making room for the extraordinary. Most of us didn’t, and won’t have the opportunity, to pick up and jet off to Rome for a special event like Maria did this weekend. However, what other choices do we make in life to make room for unpredicted outcomes?

This week my spiritual director asked me if I would be willing to consider a training program she was aware of. My instant response was “No” and all the “blocks”, “restrictions” that came with that response – I’m too old, it’s too late, it’s too expensive, it would take too long… While I need to pray and discern if that program is truly one I might be called to consider, I did realize as the week went on, that there may be other things, other learning opportunities, for me to consider once the “Blocks are blasted” (using the Artist Way terminology regarding facing our inner critics and resistance). These choices we face each day aren’t always big ones, but in each of them we might be invited to make room for Spirit to present new opportunities to us.

Do you still have a dream in your heart whispering for your attention? Is there an invitation that keeps placing itself in front of you, asking you to say “yes”? Are you open and willing to consider something new? I will reflect on those questions this week along with you!

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

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A story to tell

On By dpavinatoIn a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, contemplation, Daily Prayer, discernment, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, Ignatian prayer, Jubilee Year of Hope, Lenten journey, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, sacred seeing, Seeing things in a new way, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality4 Comments

You’ve probably heard or used the phrase, “what’s their story”, when someone is inquiring about another person. It suggests that the person in question has a backstory or anthropology that will help us understand them more deeply. This week was a wonderful lesson in being open to learning more about others and being open to what might be going on behind the scenes of the exterior I am seeing. I have two examples that touched me and a captivating discussion I would like to share. They have radically changed my outlook and I hope you find them helpful as well.

This week in spiritual direction I was sharing my need to grow in compassion and patience with others, especially when out driving and doing errands. I try to be courteous and mindful of others but darn, there are days I feel like I am the only one. I am working on stopping a negative or condemnatory response before it explodes in my mind. My director shared a video, made by Cleveland Clinic, that she has used when working with others. It is helpful when trying to be more compassionate and understanding about what might be going on in another person’s life. Wow! Tears flowed. The video, Empathy: The Human Connection to Patient Care, was made in a hospital setting sharing thoughts of various individuals working at or experiencing treatment at a hospital. It’s only slightly over 4 minutes. I highly recommend it!

After watching that video, I am trying to look at others differently, with more openness. As I walked around a grocery store yesterday, I felt the desire to be more tenderhearted. Later in the day I found an interesting new page to follow on Instagram (but also on Facebook), a_mug_of_life. A young filmmaker in England began posting his encounters with others by offering them a cup of tea and asking them to share their story and letting them know he was going to film their discussion. He only has 8 posts so far this year and every single person captivated me. Ordinary looking people with amazing stories of courage, perseverance, love and tenderness. Stories that I wouldn’t know if Will hadn’t offered them a cup to tea and asked them a few simple questions about their life. I look forward to new videos! I was grateful for the timely reminder, after watching the Cleveland Clinic video, of the stories that people are walking around with.

Earlier in the week I watched an interview of Padraig O Tuama, a poet, theologian and conflict mediator that I read and follow. The interview was done by, author and podcaster, Kate Bowler. If Kate sounds familiar, I’ve shared her writing in the past, but last week shared parts of her interview with retired Duke basketball coach, “Coach K”, regarding leadership. I like Kate but I was very curious because this wasn’t an interview pairing I would ever have imagined. Padraig was brilliant as usual, especially talking about his experience with conflicts in Ireland and his perspective on ways to see political conflict differently. He shared some precious examples of leading retreats with children and allowing them space to encounter Jesus in their imaginations, highlighting in a different way, what can happen when we nurture openness and creative thinking. Finally he shared how he approaches groups when doing conflict mediation, using the Johari Window concept of the fourth quadrant, what is unknown to the self and unknown to others. He explained that it is useful to begin by saying, I don’t know why any of those gathered are there and that, initially, what holds the group together is just the physical space of being there. He said it is fruitful to begin with an openness and willingness to nurture that space without expectations. It might allow for the imagination and curiosity to occur. Kate acknowledged that this might be helpful when we are afraid that division will “take us all apart”. Padraig replied, “Division is everywhere, the question is what we do with it.” His perspective was refreshing.

I might not be able to impact a lot of people by implementing these simple things I was reminded of this week. But I certainly can try to be more open and curious when listening to others and a little more compassionate about what others might have going on in their lives when I encounter them. I dare to say that this perspective would do us all a bit of good.

I’d love to hear from you if you have the opportunity to watch the videos or visit Will’s social media page.

Wishing you abundant peace this week, Deena

Photo: A piazza in Assisi where I enjoyed an expresso during my 2023 pilgrimage.

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It takes heart

On By dpavinatoIn A life worth living, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, discernment, Doing what we love, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, Lenten journey, Life in the Spirit, sacred listening, Spiritual Journey, spiritualityLeave a comment

March is Women’s History Month and yesterday, Saturday March 8th, was International Women’s Day. It was inspiring and uplifting to see and read positive posts about women and the potential influence and impact women have on each other and the world. I thought about the number of women who have helped shape me to be the woman I am today. I think of the women, personally and in the broader social arena, who inspire, and challenge, me to be more. I reflected on being in a later season in life, what I fondly called a Crone or Wise Woman phase of life, and my ability (and desire) to cast a positive example for younger women in an earlier season of their lives.

There are so many lovely idioms about the heart, such as pouring your heart out, losing heart, or wearing your heart on your sleeve, that express how we feel when something is important to us or suggests a deeper emotion within us about a certain event or our reaction to it. In speaking of others, to say someone “has heart” suggests that we see qualities such as kindness, compassion, courage or a deep level of empathy for others.

Beth Knobbe is a woman I met while working for Ignatian Ministries and is someone I would describe as a woman who “has heart”. I had the great pleasure of editing and publishing the weekly blog for the ministry and Beth is one of the frequent contributors. After leaving the ministry I stopped reading the blogs, not for any particular reason except to feel as though I was moving on and focus on my own voice and written content. This past Monday when I received the weekly blog email, “Blessed Are You Who Are Poor”, and noticed Beth had written it, I had a strong desire to read it and “connect” with Beth, albeit in her written word only. Beth shares a beautiful encounter (links to the pages below) with a family in her church parking lot, her reflection on that family and being called, in her mission and work with others, to stand even more profoundly on the side of the poor in the world. Beth works for Catholic Relief Services and as a result of her reflection I feel called to make a change, a small one, to stand in support of Beth, the poor, and her work at Catholic Relief Services.

When I initially planned my upcoming Lent evening of Reflection, Make My Heart Like Your Heart, I had a draft plan of launching an additional site or platform, besides this Journeys blog page, of courses or other events. The past two weeks have been a time of deep prayer, discernment, reflection and journaling. I have realized that creating such a platform isn’t what I want to spend time and energy on. I won’t go into all the details today, but some of my motivation for having a suggested registration fee (not required!) for the Retreat was for the cost of Zoom, starting and maintaining a website to handle registrations and a platform on which classes could remain and be viewed again. Yes, I still need to have Zoom as a platform for us to gather, but that really is the only expense I have and will use for other things like prayer gatherings or future retreats. So, all that said, I still plan on offering the retreat on the evening of March 20 but 100% of the proceeds from the retreat from those who choose to donate (not required to attend) will be donated to Catholic Relief Services and an event she is hosting (also on March 20) for the 50th Anniversary of Catholic Relief Services Rice Bowl. I’m not going to set up an online registration, you can send me a message (on this blog or on social media) if you would like to attend so that I can send a Zoom link privately the day before the event and provide my mailing address if you wish to donate for the event.

You can read Beth’s blog on Ignatian Ministries Into the Deep blog page or a copy of the same article on Beth’s website. I would encourage you to follow both sites if you don’t already.

It takes heart to put yourself out there, to have the courage and confidence to share your thoughts, feelings and emotions with others. It also takes heart to listen to and follow the inner guidance that comes from prayer and time spent in reflection and meditation. It takes heart to be a voice for others, like Beth and so many other voices that I share with you in the course of this weekly format. Take time to go within and listen to the quiet tugs on your heart. Who needs to hear your voice? Can you be a voice for others?

If you want to spend time in reflection and sharing with others in a format of prayer and support, I hope you will join us for the Lent Evening of Reflection, Make My Heart Like Your Heart, on March 20th. It will be a simple format of listening to scripture, reflecting on it and then sharing with others. I will have a few thoughts to share on each of the three scriptures. If this sounds like a new practice for you, no worries, come to be with others and experience prayerful community.

Wishing you abundant peace this week, Deena

Blog image: From PicMonkey

Retreat image and information:

Reminder: A Lent Night of Reflection entitled “Make My Heart Like Your Heart: Encounter and Change of Heart” will be held on Thursday, March 20 from 6:30 – 8:30 p.m. Central Time. The suggested donation for the event is $19. As mentioned above, 100% of the proceeds will be donated to Catholic Relief Services. During the event we will reflect on the things in the world that consume our heart and attention, our need and desire to give and receive forgiveness, and ways that we can pour out our love to God in a personal and sincere way. I am excited to offer this and I hope you will be able to join me. 

Freely choose what seems good

On By dpavinatoIn A life worth living, a season of hope, Benedictine Oblate, Catholic faith, Coming home to myself, contemplation, discernment, Doing what we love, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, Jubilee Year of Hope, Life in the Spirit, Life of purpose, mindfulness, spiritual freedom, sacred listening, sacred seeing, sacred waiting, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality, Teachers and Guides on the journey2 Comments

Have you ever spent so much time weighing options, an action to take or a decision to make, that you never really take a step or make a move? “What is the better of these two choices? What if I make the wrong choice? What if I don’t have enough information to decide?” We can paralyze ourselves with indecision.

This past week was the feast day of St. Francis de Sales, a saint known for his kind and gentle spiritual direction. St. Francis de Sales is a Doctor of the Catholic Church, The Doctor of Divine Love. The title of Doctor is given to saints who are recognized for having a significant impact on theology or doctrine as a result of their work and writing/teaching. He was the spiritual director to St. Jane de Chantal, another saint I regard highly because of her courage and patience in the face of the challenges she encountered and her desire to help others, especially the poor. St. Francis de Sales reminded St. Jane, when she desired to enter a religious community after the death of her husband, that there was holiness in her daily tasks as a mother and that being faithful to the real life in front of her each day was a way to become holy. Eventually he counseled her to begin a new order of women, The Order of the Visitation of Holy Mary or The Visitation Sisters. St. Francis also had a temper and struggled with resentment, but he believed that the spiritual life is made up of mistakes we learn and grow from. For this reason, I also have a special fondness for him and his teaching.

He wrote of making decisions, especially when faced with two good options, “as S. Basil says, freely choose what seems to us good, so as not to weary our spirit, lose time, and put ourselves in danger of disquiet, scruples, and superstition. But I mean always where there is no great disproportion between the two works, and where there is no considerable circumstance on one side more than on the other.” He said that we should pray and ask for clarity from the Holy Spirit, seek the guidance of a spiritual director or one or two spiritual friends and then “devoutly, peacefully, and firmly keep and pursue it.”

We can hold ourselves back by saying that we don’t have this skill or aptitude or that someone else is better equipped with a particular gift. We can focus on the abilities of others and neglect to see the good that we can do with the talents we have been given.

Today and last Sunday, Second and Third Sunday in Ordinary Time, the second reading has been from the Letter of St. Paul to the Corinthians. In this letter, St. Paul is advising the church of Corinth that the Spirit of God gives different gifts and forms of service, different parts of the body that all make up the Body of Christ. We are all given our own unique talent to serve those around us. Each of these is necessary for a healthy and thriving community. All of these gifts are valuable to the whole.

In another profound weekly article by Maria Shriver, she considers how to find peace in the world, peace after the devastation of the LA Fires and peace as we navigate change in our country. She states that the way to build something new is to build from within, “to get quiet, to truly bring our peaceful selves to the table.” “Listening, trying to understand, caring for another, loving another, bestowing grace, forgiveness, kindness, and mercy on another—that’s something each of us can do.” Simple but dramatic ways to have an impact.

I have been considering this for myself, in this new year of 2025. Beginning this Spring, I will be adding a new page to this site (or perhaps a new site), mini-courses and ways to connect with each other as I launch a new venture into the world. True To Self Living will be a journey of being our most authentic self in the world. We will use practices from various disciplines such as faith and spirituality, mindfulness, creativity and wellness to live a life that allows the full expression of who we are, a way to come home to ourselves. I believe, like Maria, that when we do this we also have a positive impact on the world.

What gifts do you have and offer to those around you? In what ways do you, or can you, serve your family and friends, making a positive impact on their day? What ways might you get quiet and bring peace and concern, a gentleness like St. Francis de Sales, to those you encounter? Let’s work together to bring peace to the world in a way that only we can.

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Image: a sign I saw on the wall at Tea Room at the Depot in Mackinaw, IL.

Poverty of spirit

On By dpavinatoIn A life worth living, a season of hope, Catholic faith, contemplation, Daily Prayer, discernment, Every day Catholic, Fruit of the Spirit, Life in the Spirit, Poverty of Spirit, sacred listening, sacred waiting, spiritual freedom, Spiritual Journey, spirituality2 Comments

I participated in Judith Valente’s “Writing the Prologue to Your New Year”, a retreat I look forward to each January. Part of the retreat is to reflect on our “word of the year”. This tradition of considering a word for the new year goes back to the 2nd or 3rd century when individuals seeking spiritual insight and wisdom would go to one of the Desert Fathers or Mothers and “ask for a word”. Most of us don’t have a desert monastery of wise elders to seek out. Most of us don’t even have a spiritual father or mother who knows us well enough to provide that “word” based on their insight to the spiritual journey we are on. We are left to our own discovery, discernment or discrimination of the word that can carry us through the new year.

This past week, words emerged like kernels popping up in a popcorn popper or one of those bingo cages that you spin to pull out the next important letter in the game. Words were tossed and spinning all week and I had a long list to sit with on Friday before sharing my word on Saturday morning. It isn’t my word for 2025 or phrase, (sets of words are ok to choose, there aren’t any rules!) but “poverty of spirit” kept capturing my attention all week. It kept coming up as part of reflections I was reading or podcasts I have been listening to in the new year. So I kept pondering what it might mean, for me, as the phrase kept presenting itself over and over.

One example of trust and humility that was shared in a podcast was that as young children we turn to our parents when asked a question like “what would you like to order to eat” or “to drink”. We, as children, aren’t aware of all the options or what is acceptable, so we turn to a trusting adult to help us decide. Poverty of spirit is the same type of humility or dependence on God as God’s children, turning to the One who can help us see more clearly.

I reflected earlier this week (my first mid-week reflection) on President Jimmy Carter’s funeral services. He certainly seemed to be a man with a poverty of spirit, a will to serve God and others, before self, always looking for ways to be attentive to what God desired for him to do and where he was needed to help others.

As I reflected on these two examples I determined that I can’t be open to hear or listen when my “hands” and mind are grasping tightly to what I think I need to do or be. My tendency is to anxiously hurry up and figure out the next step. This can create confusion or perhaps beginning to go down a path that isn’t the “right” one. I realize that I need an open spirit, willing to ask, “God, I don’t know what I want, or even what the options are (because I surely can’t see them all) or what is best for me, so will you help me decide?”

Jesus’ Baptism, that we remember as we end the Christmas season today, was not a baptism that Jesus needed. It was a baptism for the rest of us. As Fr. Paul Carlson, my parish pastor, shared in his homily, St. Gregory of Nazianzus said that “when Jesus rises from the waters, the whole world rises with him. As Jesus rises from the waters, our recreation has begun”. To be recreated though, requires a poverty of spirit to be called and led, to change and to be transformed.

This week retired minister, speaker and writer, Catherine E. Smith shared her blog on Baptism in an email (links below). She shared a beautiful story of Jesus’ Baptism and a Blessing for each of us. I share the closing stanza of her story.

Baptism is concrete and holy and full of mystery.

Out of the cloud-split heavens the words of belovedness are spoken. 

These words fall upon Christ and in Christ they fall upon us. 
We are the beloved. 

In those days, in these days, in days to come
We are the beloved,
And we are beautiful to behold. 

To listen for my call, for words of “belovedness” being spoken to me, or even to hear my word for 2025, takes a poverty of spirit. Am I willing to say “I don’t know what to choose, will you guide me?” Am I willing to emerge from the waters open to hearing what I am being called to? Am I willing to be transformed? I invite you this week to consider these questions also.

Wishing you abundant peace, Deena

Link to Catherine’s website, Hem of the Light, click here.

Link to Catherine’s post on Baptism (not on the website yet), click here.

Photo: Statue of the Baptism of Jesus, Epiphany Parish, Normal IL.